When I was a little kid, I always apologized to whomever I had offended by making a card, with the magic words scribbled on colorful cardboard paper. ("I'm sorry for being mean, Mom.") Now, as an adult, it's much harder to summon the words—and sometimes, the energy—to apologize in a meaningful way.

Experts say few of us know how to apologize well, or have the bravery to do so. But apologizing comes with a host of benefits for both the person delivering the message and the one receiving it. With that in mind, I asked a few experts for tips on making sincere apologies. Here's what they offered:

• Don't rush into it. Apologies are better late than early, one researcher told me. If you apologize too soon, the person you wronged likely won't believe that you understand what you did and truly feel bad about it.
• Accept responsibility. If you're both at fault, take responsibility for the parts of the conflict you're responsible for. Resist the urge to phrase it as, “I’m sorry I did this, but you also did that.”
• Be clear about how you plan to repair things. This could be as simple as replacing a broken wine glass, or as forward-looking as explaining the steps you'll take to be less reactive in the future.

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