A Special Message for Discouraged Parents
Parenting is hard. We speak to many people every day who are struggling with challenging parenting issues. It’s natural to get caught up in negative thoughts about yourself and your family.
Here are some common thoughts we hear from parents: - “I love my family, but sometimes I don’t like being a parent.”
- ”My friends’ kids are so easy. Why can’t my kids be like them?”
- “I’m just not good at this. I’m failing as a parent.”
So what do you do when you are discouraged stuck in negative thinking? Here are some things we’ve learned from working with so many parents over the years. 1. Don’t Compare Your Insides to Other People’s Outsides
When we compare how other people seem on the outside to how we feel on the inside, it is easy to get discouraged with our struggles. The truth is, no one has it all, and we all have negative thoughts about ourselves or our families at times.
So don’t compare your real life to someone’s seemingly picture-perfect social media images. You’ll always come up short.
Just know that there is no such thing as a perfect parent.
Everyone has moments where they make parenting mistakes. Everyone has moments where they regret their words or their actions. And everyone has moments where they wish they could start the day over.
Mistakes and regrets come with the job. Mistakes and regrets are OK.
2. It’s OK to Ask for Help
When you are feeling stuck or unsure of what to do next, it is OK to reach out to a friend or to find online resources to help you. Kids don’t come with an instruction manual, but there are lots of resources available.
Warning: be wary of judgmental friends and relatives who make you feel inadequate. Just focus on your child’s behavior and not on how others are making you feel.
And don’t blame your child for how others are making you feel. If you can do this, you will feel better, and you will be a more effective parent.
3. You’re Not Alone
The Empowering Parents team has the privilege of speaking with so many parents from all around the world. We can tell you that if you are feeling overwhelmed, tired, worried, or upset about a parenting challenge, you are in good company here. It’s common to feel this way.
When you are having negative thoughts, be kind to yourself. Remind yourself that we are all just doing the best that we can. We are all in this together. We’re glad you are here with us.
Warmly,
The Empowering Parents Team
Related article: How to Let Go of Parenting Guilt |
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