LISTEN ONLINE“Feverish in body, disturbed in mind—sinful, vile, tempted. A lost, humbling day, have seldom seen a worse. Lord, have pardon.” So wrote John Newton in his diary for 2 September, 1767. The writer of “Amazing Grace” and an important figure in the abolition of the evil slave trade he once supported, Newton was no stranger to spiritual struggles.
Although living hundreds of years later, we too can feel ourselves ripped apart over the tug of war between the sinful nature and our desire to please God. Yet Newton persevered and four months later thanked God for His “mercy, health, peace, plenty”.
The apostle Paul also found himself torn between doing what was right and what was evil, and in his letter to the Romans he explains that it’s part of the law of sin waging war on our souls. His despair resonates with us: “I do not do the good I want to do, but the evil I do not want to do—this I keep on doing” (Romans 7:19). The law instructs us about what is wrong but can leave us wondering how to change.
Despair at our inner torment is mercifully not the end of the story. Through God, we can find hope for the hopeless; release for the prisoners of sin (v. 23). Or as Paul expresses it, “Thanks be to God who delivers me through Jesus Christ our Lord” (v. 25). Amazing grace indeed!