1.  ‘Coyote vs. Acme’ Is Apparently Dead All Over Again

 CENA UNSEEN 

A new report reveals that Warner Bros. CEO David Zaslav never even saw the movie before deciding to permanently shelve it.

ENTERTAINMENT

2.  Kansas AG Demands Schools Out Trans Kids to Their Parents

  ‘WOKE GENDER IDEOLOGY’ 

Even though there’s no state law requiring the schools to do so.

U.S. NEWS

This Anti-Aging Cream Duo Is a Great Alternative to Retinol

  SKIN DEEP 

If your skin is too sensitive to use retinol, give this anti-aging face and eye cream set a try.

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3.  Teens Arrested After Adoptive Mom Found Dead in Her Garage

 GRISLY CRIME 

The teens are accused of claiming they were kidnapped, but authorities tracked them down and arrested them.

WORLD

4.  Axe-Swinging Hostage Taker Shot by Swiss Police on Train

 DARING RESCUE 

He was killed after taking 15 people hostage.

WORLD

KeySmart Just Dropped an Ultra-Slim Rechargeable Tracker

 LOST AND FOUND 

The tracking card works like other Bluetooth trackers, but it’s slimmer and rechargeable, so you won’t have to change the battery every other month.

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5.  Jonathan Majors Accused of Abuse by More Women: Report

 WORSE AND WORSE 

The former Marvel star was allegedly violent with one ex-partner, while another accused him of emotional abuse.

ENTERTAINMENT

6.  Feds Probe Threats Against Potential Witness in Trump Case

 UNDER FIRE 

Special counsel Jack Smith filed to request permission to enter an exhibit under seal regarding the witness and the threats they have faced over social media.

POLITICS

7.  Principal on Leave After Terrifying Active Shooter Drill

 ‘SHOCKING’ 

Nina Denson allegedly announced several kids were dead after she roamed the campus pretending to be a gunman.

U.S. NEWS

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8.  Rolling Stone Editor-in-Chief Noah Shachtman Steps Down

 ‘THE RIGHT DECISION’ 

The move came after “many discussions about the direction of the brand,” Shachtman said.

MEDIA

9.  Former Mets GM Suspended for Faking Player Injuries

  HARDBALL 

While the use of the “phantom injured list” is common throughout baseball, Billy Eppler is the first to be officially disciplined.

ENTERTAINMENT

10.  Wild Footage Shows Runaway Kangaroo at Apartment Complex

 WALLABY DARNED! 

It was not your typical Florida wildlife emergency.

U.S. NEWS

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11.  Biden Confuses Presidents of Egypt and Mexico During Presser

 ‘WEAK AND SAD’  

The president may have wanted to squash reports questioning his mental acuity, but it appears he’s done the exact opposite.

POLITICS

12.  White House Correspondents’ Dinner Has a Host

 HOST JOST 

“His sharp insights perfectly meet this remarkable time of divided politics,” the association’s president said.

MEDIA

13.  Austin Scorned ‘Not Very Good’ Militants Before U.S. Deaths

 PRIDE BEFORE FALL? 

The defense secretary did, however, prophetically warn that they might “get lucky.”

WORLD

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