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1. Jacksonville Gunman Was a ‘Socially Awkward’ Kid: Classmate
‘INTROVERTED’
Ryan Palmeter left behind a violent manifesto that a law enforcement official described as “quite frankly, the diary of a madman.”
U.S. NEWS
2. Conservative Activist ‘Joe the Plumber’ Dies at 49
CAMPAIGN CAMEO
Joe Wurzelbacher announced that he had been diagnosed with pancreatic cancer earlier this summer.
POLITICS
Revive Parched, Sun-Damaged Skin With This $16 Moisturizer
BUBBLING THIS UP
Bubble’s new Cloud Surf Moisturizer works just as well as formulas double its price.
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3. Restaurateur Behind Kansas Newspaper Raid Speaks Out
PUBLIC ENEMY #1
“I’ve probably got 600 or 700 messages saying I have blood on my hands,” she said.
MEDIA
4. Large CTE Study Finds Brain Damage Even in Amateur Athletes
BAD NEWS
Boston University's research discovered more than 60 cases of CTE in athletes who were under 30 years old at the time of their death.
ENTERTAINMENT
Marlow Pillow Is Having an End-of-Summer Sale
PILLOW TALK
Don’t sleep on this sale; Marlow Pillow is ending summer with their buy-more, save-more promotion.
5. Chess Cheating Scandal Ends With Grandmaster’s Reinstatement
POTENTIAL REMATCH?
The saga, which included accusations of vibrating anal beads and more, has finally come to a close—at least in court.
6. Trump Spreads ‘Roomer’ That DeSantis Plans to End Campaign
BLATHERING
The former president claimed, without a shred of evidence, that his GOP nomination rival is making alternative plans.
7. 2 Dead After Police Chopper Crashes Into Florida Apartments
TERRIFYING
Video taken of the incident appears to show the aircraft engulfed in smoke prior to going down.
8. Ukraine Claims to Break Russian Line, Liberate Village
ONWARD
Kyiv says its forces are now fighting to push further south.
WORLD
9. Rape Suspect Nicholas Rossi Got Over $50K in U.K. Legal Aid
MILKING THE SYSTEM
Rossi has been using publicly funded legal aid to fight extradition since 2020.
10. Elton John Hospitalized After Falling in France
SLIP UP
The legendary singer has reportedly been spending the summer at his Nice villa with his husband and two sons.
11. 67-Year-Old Man Allegedly Tried to Rob Bank for Rent Money
SAD
“It was the last chance for him to obtain $650.00 before he would be homeless.”
12. Pennsylvania Man Arrested for Attacking Cops on Jan. 6
GOTTA CATCH 'EM ALL
James Maryanski allegedly called the Jan. 6 riot a “dry run” on Facebook after the riot.
13. Soccer Chief’s Mom on Hunger Strike Over ‘Hunt’ Against Son
HOLY MOLY
She said the demonstration was in protest of Luis Rubiales’ “inhumane treatment” after he gave a female player an unsolicited kiss.
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