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1. Trump Faces 30+ Counts Relating to Business Fraud: CNN

  YUGE TROUBLE 

A witness reportedly gave 30 minutes of testimony before the Manhattan grand jury took its historic vote.

POLITICS

2. Russia Unveils New Policy to Address ‘Existential’ Threat

 COLD WAR 2.0 

The new doctrine calls the U.S. the “main source” of risk to Russian security.

WORLD

This $24 Neck Light Is a Major Life Upgrade for Avid Readers

 NECK-LEVEL SOLUTION 

If reading paperbacks in the dark is your style, try this ergonomic neck light on for size.

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3. Lawyer Says There’s ‘Zero’ Chance Trump Will Take Plea Deal

 ‘NOT GONNA HAPPEN’ 

Joe Tacopina said Trump was “shocked” to learn of the criminal indictment against him.

U.S. NEWS

4. Gwyneth Explains Why She Went to Court Over Ski Accident

 GOOPED 

“I am pleased with the outcome,” she added in a statement she posted on her Instagram story after her legal victory.

ENTERTAINMENT

Spring Cleaning: This Top-Rated Water Flosser Is 40% Off

 TOP TIER CLEAN 

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5. Tesla Launches Its Own Cybertruck-Inspired Beer

 BOOZE CONTROL 

Three bottles of drink—made with “Cyberhops”—will set you back almost $100.

WORLD

6. Wimbledon Will Allow Russian Players to Compete This Year

 COURT DRAMA 

But they’ll have to enter the tournament as “neutral athletes.”

ENTERTAINMENT

7. 3 Arrested Over Tekashi 6ix9ine’s Gym Attack

 CUFFED 

Videos showing the rapper being beaten went viral last week.

ENTERTAINMENT

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8. 35 Dead After Well’s Cover Collapses in Temple

 HORRIFIC 

Dozens of people plunged into the water.

WORLD

9. Trump and His Minions ‘Caught Off Guard’ by Indictment: NYT

 SURPRISE! 

They reportedly thought it was weeks away.

POLITICS

10. Girl’s Pet Goat Feared to Have Been Barbecued: Lawsuit

 NO KIDDING 

Jessica Long tried to save her daughter’s goat, Cedar, after he was entered into a livestock auction.

U.S. NEWS

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11. Senior Staff for Texas Lawmaker Resigns En Masse

 ‘ABUSIVE AND HOSTILE’ 

Among their complaints with state Rep. Jolanda Jones, a Democrat, was an allegedly hostile workplace and the fostering of an improper relationship between her son and an intern.

POLITICS

12. Hollywood to Drop On-Set COVID-19 Safety Measures in May

 CUT, PRINT, MOVING ON 

The Return-to-Work agreement mandated social distancing measures and mask wearing, and provided sick pay for cast and crew.

ENTERTAINMENT

13. Spanish TV Star Slammed For Using Baby Surrogate at Age 68

 OH MAMA! 

Surrogacy is banned in her homeland, but Ana Obregón traveled to Miami to become a mom again.

WORLD

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