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1. Trump’s Super Bowl Attendance Fails to Drive Up Tanking Ticket Prices
BARGAIN BOWL
Tickets for Super Bowl LIX in New Orleans this year can be bagged for below $4,000.
U.S. NEWS
2. Publishers Sue After Idaho Bans Books Like ‘Game of Thrones’
HITTING THE BOOKS
Industry heavyweights including Penguin Random House and HarperCollins have launched a legal challenge.
Nutribullet’s New Portable Blender Streamlined My Morning Smoothie Routine
SMOOTHIES ON THE GO
The Nutribullet Flip, an insulated portable blender, allows you to make smoothies, protein shakes, and other blended drinks on the go.
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3. NFL Quietly Drops ‘End Racism’ Super Bowl Message as Trump Targets DEI
SIGN OF THE TIMES
Viewers will be asked to “Choose Love” instead.
4. 100K Eggs Stolen in Massive Heist as Prices Soar
HARD TO BEAT
The eggs are worth an estimated $40,000.
These Heated Chairs Are a Must-Have Cold Plunge Companion
HEAT CHECK
Athletes, fitness fanatics, and wellness enthusiasts will love adding Galanter & Jones heated chairs to their outdoor cold plunge lineup.
5. Has Musk Launched Memecoin With ‘White House Tech Support’ Gag?
ULTIMATE TROLL
The DOGE chief changed his X bio to “White House Tech Support,” as a new cryptocurrency with the same name launched at the same time.
POLITICS
6. Phony ICE Agents Try to Join Trump’s Immigration Crackdown
ON THE PROWL
ICE impersonators have been arrested in at least three states, CNN reports.
7. Kanye Boasts: My Wife Is ‘Most Googled’ Person on Earth After Naked Grammys Stunt
BREAKING THE INTERNET
“WE BEAT THE GRAMMIES,” the rapper bragged on social media.
OBSESSED
8. Greenland Blocks Foreign Political Cash as Trump Rekindles Takeover Talk
MUSK-PROOF
New law bans political donations from overseas.
WORLD
9. Trump Wants to Bring ‘Sharpiegate’ Scientist Back to NOAA
PERFECT STORM
Neil Jacobs was in charge in 2019 when the president appeared to redraw an official map of Hurricane Dorian’s projected path using a permanent marker.
10. New Diddy Lawsuits Allege Drugging and Rapes at Trump Hotel
SHOCKING DETAILS
Two lawsuits were filed against the rapper, according to a new report from TMZ.
11. Sorry Shoppers: Trump’s Tariffs Mean No Packages From China
GOODBYE SHEIN
The USPS announced a temporary suspension of inbound packages from China days after the president signed an order imposing a 10% tariff on the country.
12. Trump’s Backup Plan Confirmed as Attorney General
GREEN LIGHT
Pam Bondi won her confirmation in a 54-46 vote.
13. Trump Totally Dismisses Female Afghan Reporter: ‘Can’t Understand a Word’
THANK YOU, NEXT
The moment was overshadowed by Trump’s claim that the U.S. will “take over” Gaza.
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