Crucial Skills

JANUARY 11, 2023 • VOL. 21 ISSUE 2

Hi John,

Feedback: difficult to deliver, and perhaps even harder to hear.

We’ve spent decades teaching people how to speak up and say hard things with respect. In today’s Q&A, we discuss how to receive tough feedback or respond to a Crucial Conversation, regardless of how well it’s delivered.

CRUCIAL CONVERSATIONS FOR ACCOUNTABILITY

When Feedback Feels Abusive

by Brittney Maxfield

I’ve had trouble with employees being vigilant to hold peers accountable, but in a way that isn’t very kind. How do you encourage peer accountability and ensure it doesn’t end up as a form of bullying?

Signed
Concerned

Holding people accountable can be challenging. When you hold someone accountable, you are giving them uncomfortable feedback about their behavior. You are in effect holding up a mirror to show them that what they said, did, or didn’t do isn’t acceptable. Does that feedback get easier to hear when it’s said with a smile? With kind words? With a gentle tone?

Several years ago, we did a study on feedback. We wanted to know how people responded to feedback, especially harsh feedback…

Separate Facts and Stories to Avoid Jumping to Conclusions

A conclusion is an interpretation of facts. Use this tip to share your conclusion when it differs from another’s.

Watch Video

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Your List vs Your Memory

Having a good memory is like knowing a good card trick: useful for impressing people at a party, but probably won’t help you do your job well.

Watch Video

FEB 13–17

Crucial Conversations^® for Mastering Dialogue

Join us live online and learn how to:

Resolve conflict.
Speak your mind truthfully and tactfully.
Reach alignment when stakes are high and opinions vary.
Navigate the most important interactions at home and work.

Take criticism seriously, but not personally. If there is truth or merit in the criticism, try to learn from it. Otherwise, let it roll right off you.

—Hillary Clinton

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