1.  Don Jr. Denies Speech Was Cocaine-Fueled, Blames Lighting

 NOT VERY BRIGHT 

The president’s oldest son was asked about social-media speculation during his speech.

2.  White House Bullied CDC into Weaker COVID Testing: Official

  SHOCKER 

What had become obvious to most Americans—you do not need symptoms to be a COVID-19 carrier—is suddenly no longer accepted by the top public health agency in the country.

3.  If You Ever Shop Online, You Need to Check Out Wikibuy

 AD BY WIKIBUY 

Find cheaper prices and coupon codes with this free to use browser extension.

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4.  Biden: I Told Blake’s Family ‘Justice Must and Will Be Done’

 ‘UNITE AND HEAL’ 

The Democratic presidential nominee decried the shooting of another Black man by a cop, while insisting that “burning down communities is not protest.”

5.  Lewd Cheerleader Video Allegedly Made for NFL Team Owner

 SIZZLE REEL 

A former employee says a Washington Football Team executive ordered the “good bits” compiled for owner Daniel Snyder.

6.  These Adidas Favorites Are On Sale Just in Time for Fall

 FEET FIRST 

Adidas is having a footwear sale where select styles are just $50 and under.

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7.  Two New COVID Reinfection Cases Discovered in Europe

 OH NO 

Doctors say that it was “only a matter of time.”

8.  Son of NZ Mosque Shooting Victim Gives Finger to Gunman

 ‘YOU ARE WEAK’ 

Ahad Nabi unleashed on the white-supremacist killer, saying he should be buried in a landfill.

9.  John Lennon’s Killer Denied Parole for 11th Time

 STILL DOING TIME 

The man who shot the esteemed Beatles musician in 1980 says that he’s found Jesus since committing his crime.

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10.  Anti-Masker Arrested, Wheeled Out of Idaho Capitol on Chair

 NO, DON’T GET UP 

Cops rolled Ammon Bundy out the building on a wheeled office chair he’d tied himself to.

11.  CDC Warns Workers Not to Argue With Unmasked Customers

  KEEP SAFE 

Employees should prioritize their own safety: “Don’t argue with a customer if they make threats or become violent.”

12.  Half a Million Ordered to Flee Category 4 Hurricane Laura

 ‘FORMIDABLE’ 

“If you decide to stay, you’re staying on your own,” Port Arthur’s mayor warns, as forecasters say storm surge could push 30 miles inland.

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13.  Two Pro-Democracy Opposition Lawmakers Arrested in Hong Kong

 ‘COMPLETELY UNREASONABLE’ 

One lawmaker is accused of rioting in connection with an attack in which he was targeted by a mob in a subway station.

14.  Louisville Cops Arrest 68 People at Breonna Taylor Protests

 ‘DANGEROUS SITUATION’ 

Porsha Williams, star of “The Real Housewives of Atlanta,” was reportedly one of the dozens of protesters arrested.

15.  Alaska AG Who Sent 100s of Flirty Texts to Employee Resigns

 ‘G-RATED’ 

The messages, which referred to the woman’s beauty and included kiss emojis, were made public by ProPublica and the Anchorage Daily News.

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