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Craig Bellamy (left). He’s sensible now, apparently.
camera Craig Bellamy (left). He’s sensible now, apparently. Photograph: Peter Byrne/PA
02/04/2024

Premier League action … on a Tuesday?! Now we’re talking!

John Brewin
 

HAMMERED

A massive week for Everton, though doesn’t every week now seem a massive week for the formerly Hafnia-sponsored School of Science? Nothing but the best is good enough? A positive result from Tuesday’s meeting with Newcastle and a kindly ruling from the latest probe into the club’s finances would probably do fine.

Amid five Premier League matches played on Easter Tuesday, Everton at Newcastle takes the eye. Not least because half the Toon’s defence either limped off or were carried off during Saturday’s 4-3 win over West Ham. Time then, for Sean Dyche to really go for it at Newcastle, release those defensive shackles, and well, do everything his team has not done this season. Or Dyche has done, well, ever. For all the Dychian growls of positivity, the Ev have been playing like a blocked drain, a torpid defeat at Bournemouth just the latest sorry example.

For West Ham, losing at Newcastle was less thriller, more psychological horror for Kalvin Phillips. After his understandable if ill-advised reaction to Hammers fans outside St James’ Park, it’s unlikely he will be in the team that faces Tottenham at the London Stadium, a fixture Spurs have lost the last two seasons.

At Tottenham, the big news is that club suits are celebrating planning permission for a flash new hotel at the Tottenham Stadium, to be built in time for Euro 2028. Will that include a Postecoglou suite, done out in the finest chintz Paul Robinson and Mr Udigawa once offered at Lassiter’s? That probably depends on Ange’s team making it to Big Cup soccer on a regular basis from now until then.

Another continuum of Saturday’s action will take place at Turf Moor where a tracksuited Craig Bellamy takes charge of Burnley, who face Wolves while suspended Big Vin Kompany takes his Kendall Roy headgear to the stands. That’s despite part-owner JJ Watt’s utterly hilarious April Fool’s joke that he will do the job instead. Stick to American football, JJ: Bellamy v Gary O’Neil shapes up for a decent session of touchline classic “Hold Me Back”.

While Bournemouth v Crystal Palace might simply be an exhibition between two clubs probably out of trouble and with coaches doing Interesting Things with tactics, Nottingham Forest v Fulham honks with vitality and meaning. Like Everton and Goodison Park, the City Ground seethes with insurrection against the suits managing Our League. During Saturday’s 1-1 draw with Palace, that sense of injustice at a points deduction made for a frenzied affair. Next, Forest will try to contain Fulham hot shot Rodrigo Muniz. All that, and it’s still only Tuesday.

QUOTE OF THE DAY

“We as a company are committed to opposing xenophobia, antisemitism, violence and hatred in every form. We will block personalisation of the jerseys” – Adidas has banned football fans from customising the German national shirt with the number 44 due to its perceived resemblance to the symbol used by Nazi SS units during the second world war. Concerns over the jerseys were originally raised by the historian Michael König, who said the kit’s design was “very questionable”.

Germany football shirt.
camera Composite: Adidas

FOOTBALL DAILY LETTERS

“Shame on everyone involved in this borefest. Not one player could be bothered to send in a cross to let (Gabriel) Jesus rise to meet it and score on Easter Sunday. To appropriate Padmé Amidala, ‘So this is how nominative determinism dies, with a complete lack of thunderous applause or any atmosphere whatsoever for a big game at the Etihad’” – Noble Francis.

Send letters to the.boss@theguardian.com. Today’s winner of our prizeless letter o’ the day is … it’s a rollover!

MOVING THE GOALPOSTS

Why are the WSL’s female coaches a minority? Ella Braidwood talks to Carla Ward and Remi Allen to discuss the lack of female managers in the elite women’s game and why it is important to “remove the dinosaurs”. And remember, you can sign up for our newsletter on the women’s game right here.

RECOMMENDED LISTENING

In Tuesday’s edition of Women’s Football Weekly, Faye Carruthers is joined by Suzanne Wrack, Sophie Lawson, and Sophie Downey to discuss the Continental Cup Final and WSL and answer the question: was Emma Hayes’s comments about Jonas Eidevall fair?

The Guardian Podcasts

NEWS, BITS AND BOBS

Ajax have suspended their new CEO Alex Kroes on suspicion he has been involved in insider trading in the club’s shares. The board said it had learned Kroes had bought more than 17,000 Ajax shares a week before his intended appointment was announced last summer.

Raphaël Varane said concussions have damaged his body and stressed the dangers of heading. “My seven-year-old son plays football and I advise him not to head the ball. For me, that’s essential,” the Manchester United defender said.

Southampton technical director and former Blackburn winger Jason Wilcox could be Manchester United technical director and former Blackburn winger Jason Wilcox by the end of the week, if Sir Jim Ratcliffe and co get their way.

The good old days.
camera The good old days. Photograph: Action Images

Plymouth Argyle have booted Ian Foster out of the nearest door marked Do One after just three months in charge.

Flamin’ Ange Postecoglou expects hopes Tottenham are in the title race in 12 months’ time. When asked whether he expects Spurs to be challenging next season, Postecoglou tooted: “I hope so. Or why am I doing what I’m doing? That’s why I came to the club. If you don’t think you’re going to be in the title race in 12 months’ time, then I don’t know why I’m here [mate].”

Vincent Kompany believes refereeing standards in the Premier League have dropped this season. “The frustration comes from that it’s a succession of mistakes and it is always debatable,” bellowed Kompany, who in unrelated news is serving a touchline ban after being sent off at Stamford Bridge.

STILL WANT MORE?

Read our writers’ talking points on the weekend of WSL and League Cup action including how Emma Hayes went too far, Leicester’s end a difficult week well and the amazing Bunny Shaw.

Bunny Shaw: can play a bit.
camera Bunny Shaw: can play a bit. Photograph: Jess Hornby/Getty Images

Nicky Bandini asks whether Thiago Motta will follow in Xabi Alonso’s footsteps and remain at Bologna or if the pull of Juventus is just too strong.

Kylian Mbappé may be leaving, but the signs at Paris Saint-Germain are still ominous for their competitors at home and abroad, writes Luke Entwistle.

The president of Brann, Aslak Sverdrup, calls on Uefa to explain why the club were fined €5,000 for chants that constitute freedom of expression.

The baring of teeth between the Premier League, the government and the putative regulator is a mere distraction from the disparity between clubs, writes Aaron Timms.

Barney Ronay ponders if Arsenal will regret not going for all three points in their goalless snoozefest against Manchester City.

MEMORY LANE

Ajax’s Clarence Seedorf, Frank Rijkaard and Nwankwo Kanu celebrate beating Milan in the Champions League final moments after the final whistle on 24 May 1995. Seedorf, who turned 48 yesterday, remains the only player to win the competition with three different teams: Ajax, Real Madrid and Milan.

Scenes.
camera Scenes. Photograph: Luca Bruno/AP

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