Spurs live down to their underdog billing as Arsenal paint the town red

Since comfortably beating Aston Villa at the start of November, Tottenham Hotspur have won only two of the 11 Premier League matches they’ve contested. Well, played in or at least turned up for. Indeed, a good lawyer might argue that technically they haven’t really won any because one of the aforementioned victories came against peak b@nter era Manchester City, while not even Spurs were capable of doing anything other than swat the current Southampton rabble aside, a feat that is not so much something to be proud of, but more the equivalent of helping yourself to the pennies covering a dead man’s eyes. Having taken just eight points from their previous 10 games, Ange Postecoglou’s knack-depleted team went into Wednesday night’s north London derby as firm underdogs … and duly lived down to their billing.

Despite taking a first-half lead with what would prove their final shot on target, they did little else to ensure that their Australian manager would conduct his post-match interviews while staring forlornly at his brogues in the style to which he, assorted interrogators and so many Spurs fans, have become wearily accustomed. “Not good enough, especially the first half which was way too passive,” fumed Ange following a derby in which only the hosts seemed to go about their business with any additional neighbourly animus. “We allowed Arsenal to take control. I was disappointed with us with and without the ball, allowing them to dictate the tempo. Nowhere near good enough. That’s not who we are. That’s not how I set the team up to play. To be sitting in and allowing Arsenal to play just wasn’t good enough.”

While all available evidence suggests that, despite Ange’s protests to the contrary, “that” is exactly who Spurs are and have been for so long that their very name has become a byword for spinelessness and meek capitulation, but quite how the increasingly frustrated Aussie plans to rid the club of its apparently ingrained loser mentality remains to be seen. With Spurs currently sitting 13th in the table eight points clear of the relegation zone and just one better off than the worst Manchester United team of the past 30 years, he is unlikely to get the chance to try anything unless results improve very quickly.

While Arsenal had knack issues of their own to contend with, their manager and fans were understandably delighted with the performance of Myles Lewis-Skelly, who became their youngest player to start a match against Spurs in 20 years. Far from being overwhelmed, the 18-year-old snapped into tackles, blocked what passed for anything resembling a kitchen sink that Spurs threw at him and crowned a memorable day at the office by winding up Richarlison. “My mum, my grandma, my friends [were at the game],” he tooted before revealing the presence of one relative in particular had kept him motivated. “I had to put on a show for my grandma, to make sure that I did not look soft in front of her. I had to make sure I was winning my tackles for her, and hopefully she is proud of me.”

Expect Ange to issue a flurry of invitations to the nans of assorted Tottenham players before Sunday’s game against Everton if he thinks it might finally shame some of his underperforming stars into a performance that might move them up the table.

Join Scott Murray at 8pm GMT for red-hot updates of Manchester United 3-0 Southampton in the Premier League.

14 January: “I want to try and show that I can go again” – David Moyes reckons he still has the energy to revitalise Everton.

15 January: “I can’t magician all that to change after one and a bit days, I just can’t do it. It’s a huge challenge” – reality hits hard (and fast) after a 1-0 defeat by Aston Villa on his big Goodison homecoming.

I would never dare doubt the accuracy and reliability of statistics from Big Website, but some of the match stats from the Holsten Pils Kiel v Dortmund game that you directed us to in Wednesday’s News, Bits and Bobs (full email edition) seem more inflated than a Roman Eagle handler’s tackle. By my maths, this works out at a shot every 52 seconds, a corner just shy of every three minutes, and more than a foul every minute. Pity the poor set-piece coaches and magic-sponge carriers, they’ll be needing a second winter break to recover from the exertions” – Neil McGwyre.

I’m not sure I need to get involved in this, but perhaps Thomas Ayre (yesterday’s Football Daily letters) meant to say that Lazio didn’t have the ‘cojones’ to sack the eagle/fascist bloke, rather than ‘cajones’, which would mean they didn’t have the drawers, or possibly coffins. Or maybe, as these are both Spanish, we’d be better off with ‘coglioni’” – Mark Taylor (and 1,056 others).

After Everton’s home defeat on Wednesday, perhaps David Moyes will actually need Leighton Baines to help him find a Pret (Tuesday’s David Squires cartoon) – as he has already lost his way” – Dedric Helgert.

Darian Boyd’s letter o’ the day (yesterday’s letters) for his motorbike-related quip was some Triumph” – Mike Wrall.

Send letters to the.boss@theguardian.com. Today’s winner of our prizeless letter o’ the day is … Neil McGwyre. Terms and conditions for our competitions – when we have them – can be viewed here.

When rather less-than-universally popular Sheffield Wednesday owner Dejphon Chansiri agreed to meet fans on Wednesday, the occasion went as well as might be expected. Those supporters hoping for good news on Chansiri’s relationship with beloved manager Danny Röhl were disappointed. The two haven’t spoken in 2025; Rohl was a candidate for the Southampton job in December. “If he doesn’t want to talk to me tomorrow, what can I do?” asked Chansiri. Tasked with finding a buyer or investment in a squad that sit 10th in the Championship but within playoff-striking distance, the Thai tuna tycoon replied: “I only wanted to sign five to six players in the summer. We signed 11. People’s definition of ‘ambitious’ is different. Mine will be completely different to someone else’s.” The five-hour conflab closed with Chansiri ducking out and returning to reveal Shea Charles, a promising star for the Owls this season, was returning to parent club Southampton. “I don’t know what I’m doing wrong,” Chansiri wailed when met with a room of unhappy Owls.

Big Website’s bookshop has a host of great new tomes, just waiting to be added to your online basket. There’s My Beautiful Sisters by Khalida Popal and David Squires’ latest brilliant collection of cartoons: Chaos in the Box. What are you waiting for!

Joey Barton has appeared in court charged with sending allegedly “indecent or grossly offensive messages” on social media abomination TwiXer to commentator Lucy Ward and TV presenter Jeremy Vine. The 42-year-old faced Chester magistrates’ court by videolink – he had been due to attend in person but Richard Derby, defending, claimed the former footballer had not been made aware of the date and was “minding the children” so was unable to attend. Barton confirmed he was indicating not guilty pleas to both offences, before being granted unconditional bail to appear at Liverpool crown court on 13 February.

Former Northampton chief suit David Cardoza has been bailed after appearing in court charged with fraud in connection with a £10m stadium redevelopment loan.

Chelsea are negotiating with the Premier League over a financial settlement related to secret payments for transfers made during Roman Abramovich’s ownership.

Birmingham chief executive officer Garry Cook has stepped down from his role due to personal reasons.

Newcastle-based Duracell Bunny Miguel Almirón is set for a return to Atlanta United in the USA! USA!! USA!!! for around £10m. Unless there’s another Paraguayan poised for a move there.

And Ruben Amorim wants his Manchester United players to look like zombies when they finish matches, citing Harry Maguire as an example of the commitment he expects. “He was dead in the end [of the Arsenal match] – I want that from every [one],” parped the Portuguese.

The WSL is back but will anyone catch Chelsea? Suzanne Wrack looks ahead to Friday’s big kick-off-again.

Worse than the Christian Gross season, worse than the Juande Ramos season and worse than the season where they fired Glenn Hoddle and basically forgot to replace him? Or actually just a bit unlucky? Jonathan Liew tries to crack the enigma that is Tottenham in 2025.

“Maybe the world isn’t ending after all. Or at least, not yet anyway.” Barney Ronay on Arsenal keeping the title race alive for now.

In customary cap and T-shirt, with hoodie, gilet and tight jeans, Steffen Baumgart is back at Union Berlin and trying to rescue the club he served so well. Andy Brassell on the return of an unlikely style icon.

Look out Jimmy Strong, look out the Port Vale of 1953, Scott Parker’s Burnley are in line to be the stingiest team in English football history. Will Unwin pours himself some Clarets.

Choo! Choo! The next stop is Manchester City for “the train” Abdukodir Khusanov, who got his career back on track after a bumpy journey from Uzbekistan.

And Alejandro Garnacho could be bound for Napoli so they can replace Khvicha Kvaratskhelia. All that and more in today’s Mill.

14 June 1987: Liverpool’s Bruce Grobbelaar shows that the trend for bigger goalkeeper gloves started way earlier than the late-noughties.