The curious incident of Son Heung-min at the ping-pong table

As the talisman for South Korea in their ill-fated Asian Cup campaign, Son Heung-min has had a difficult start to 2024. After a group stage in which the Taeguk Warriors drew with Jordan (world ranking: 87) and Malaysia (130) to scramble through in second place, it was their captain who fronted up for the traditional mid-tournament squabble with assorted hacks. “We are working very hard on the pitch. We are trying to give everything for the fans, for the country,” Son roared. “Some of the boys are being criticised or receiving comments that at times cross the line a little.” A disjointed team managed at arm’s length by Jürgen Klinsmann, South Korea then found a kind of anti-momentum, ‘zombie football’ helping them find a way past Saudi Arabia and Australia. As other big names crashed out, Son’s side looked set to ‘do an Ivory Coast’ before even Ivory Coast had done so. But much like Peter Andre in the mid-noughties, they couldn’t escape Jordan, who beat them 2-0 in a miserable semi-final rematch.

While Klinsmann breezily proposed a chat with the Korean FA about “what was good and not so good in the tournament”, Son was left to carry the can. “I don’t know what to say really. I am so sorry,” he sobbed. After the ignominy of going out to a team whose assistant coach asked for a photo with him, the embarrassment was not quite over for Son. It’s now emerged that a number of his younger teammates in Qatar did cross a line before the semi-final – one guarded with a miniature net. A Korean FA suit has explained that during a pre-game dinner, “some young players went up to play table tennis … Son and other older players took issue with it. The players exchanged a few words and Son hurt his finger in the process.” With Son perhaps justifiably sick and tired of apologising for his teammates’ mistakes, PSG forward Lee Kang-in stepped up this time. “I’m just sorry for showing football fans a bad image. I apologise to the many people who were disappointed by me,” Lee wrote on Social Media Disgrace Instachat. To which we would say: look, it’s hardly the Dentist’s Chair, is it?

Son is now back at Tottenham but still had his fingers strapped during Saturday’s win over Brighton. It’s unclear exactly how and when it happened – although anyone who has stayed at a British holiday park knows table tennis can be brutal. It also feels strangely on-brand for a largely likable and responsible player with a penchant for the occasional dodgy tackle. The curious incident of Son at the ping-pong table at least earns the forward an immediate place in the football freak-knack hall of fame, alongside the likes of Alan Mullery (toothbrush), Rio Ferdinand (coffee table), Dave Beasant (salad cream), David Batty (toddler), Kirk Broadfoot (hot egg) and Steve Morrow (Tony Adams). Now he’s back in England, Son will simply be hoping for a stress-free and stable domestic run-in with … ah.

Join Barry Glendenning for Big Cup updates on PSG 2-1 Real Sociedad at 8pm GMT, while Niall McVeigh will be on hand for Lazio 2-3 Bayern Munich.

“We are talking about a small group but I think they should stay at home if they are going to be like that, because it clearly affected the players on the pitch. It was just unacceptable in my view … I think I deserve more respect too” – Norwich boss David Wagner gets the funk on with some Canaries fans who were less than supportive towards his substitutions during the 4-2 win over Watford which has lifted them into the Championship playoff places.

The main photo in yesterday’s Football Daily seems to have Harry Kane and others in cricket whites: is this a branching out? Is there a Bavarian Cricket League? Who would be their Ben Stokes or Jimmy Anderson? And will they run up a cricket score against Lazio?” – Mark Bennett.

While Mark McFadden may want to love Leverkusen (yesterday’s Football Daily letters), it is worth bearing in mind Bayer’s historical links. Don’t mention the war and all that” – Alex Roy.

Send letters to the.boss@theguardian.com. Today’s winner of our prizeless letter o’ the day is … Mark Bennett.

Speaking of which … to League Two and the harrowing of Harrogate at Mansfield. Yup, the eighth-placed Sulphurites’ recent good run went up in smoke at Field Mill as they watched N-I-N-E goals whizz past them. “It was an outstanding exhibition of hurting the opposition,” whooped Stags boss Nigel Clough. It equalled their all-time record league win from 1932 and powered them up to second. So impressive were Mansfield that Harrogate boss Simon Weaver sounded like he enjoyed things a bit too much. “It was an incredible scoreline! Fair play, I thought they were brilliant in all aspects,” he tooted, before dialling down his tone like Bob Katter. “It was a hard night. We gift-wrapped several goals and lacked intensity. That was the element that hurts.”

A Dutch court has sentenced Spartak Moscow forward Quincy Promes to six years in prison – in absentia – for his involvement in the smuggling of 1,360kg of cocaine. Former Dutch international Promes did not attend the hearing in Amsterdam and is not expected to return to the Netherlands in the future.

Joel Barwise, an Everton fan who shouted racist abuse about Mohamed Salah and mocked the Heysel stadium disaster at last October’s Merseyside derby, has been banned from attending matches for three years and fined £500.

Matt Le Tissier and John Hartson broke UK advertising rules by posting promotional tweets about a CBD product … without telling consumers they were being paid by its retailer. Hartson claimed to be “a fan of SupremeCBD’s … gummies” while Le Tissier attested that they were a “gamechanger”.

Chris Wilder is in a pickle after being charged by the FA over his rant about a sandwich-eating assistant referee who, he claims, showed a “complete lack of respect”.

The FA has approved Sir Big Jim Ratcliffe’s 25% buy-in at Manchester United, who are also sniffing around Newcastle’s Dan Ashworth.

Pep Guardiola is chuffed to bits after Manchester City’s 3-1 Big Cup win at Copenhagen but admits Jack Grealish appears to have twanged his groin. “I didn’t speak with the doctor but it looks muscular with Jack,” he lamented. “It’s something muscular, his groin – it’s a pity. We’ll do tests.”

Real Madrid also have the advantage in their Big Cup tie with Leipzig, Brahim Díaz producing a sumptuous solo effort for the only goal.

Leeds are into the Championship’s top two after a 4-0 smiting of Swansea, combined with Southampton’s unbeaten streak ending at Bristol City. “I’m disappointed, but immensely proud of the players for the run we have been on,” sighed Saints boss Russell Martin. “To go 25 games unbeaten is phenomenal.”

Ivory Coast caretaker boss Emerse Faé says winning the Afcon title on home soil feels like “revenge” after he was forced to retire early. “I had to stop playing at 28 as it was jeopardising my health,” he said. “Since then, I’ve decided I was going to win every trophy as a manager that I did not win as a player.” Next stop the Premier League?

And Dorking Wanderers owner/manager/PR hype man Marc White has been flapping his gums in the modern style after their 1-0 National League win at fellow strugglers York City. “How d’you like them apples [mothereffers], yeah? That’s what I’m saying … One thing you should learn about a team that’s come as far as us is you should never write us off.”

Arsenal’s Kieran Tierney gets his chat on with Sid Lowe about life on loan at Real Sociedad, the “crazy” football culture there and facing Kylian Mbappé.

Steven Pye recalls an absolute thunder [snip – Football Daily Bad Word Ed] of a golden goal by Johnny Metgod against West Ham in 1986.

“Freddy Adu was just like Messi”: what happened to America’s Pelé? By Ryan Baldi.

And the Knowledge takes a deep dive into the biggest points gaps between one position and the next, along with plenty more besides.

Spoiler: it’s Valentine’s Day so here’s some romancing the woodwork at Molineux in May 2011 after Wolves and Blackburn both managed to avoid relegation from the Premier League on the final day of the season. Rovers won 3-2, but Birmingham’s defeat against Spurs sent them down to the second tier instead. It would be a brief respite: the two teams would slip through the trap-door the following season.