Florida Man: your next braai game
TL;DR: Is he a superhero? Is he a public menace? Or is he the spirit of chaos that lives in all of us? The origins of the eponymous Florida Man, revealed.
If you haven’t participated in the viral Florida Man game yet, then you’re about to discover something really fun. You can play it right now, as you’re sitting with your phone in your hand or your browser open. Simply open a new tab and type “Florida man” followed by your birthday into Google search. The first news headline that comes up is your very own Florida Man spirit animal.
When I do mine, the result is “Florida man hit dad in face with pizza after learning he helped deliver him, police say.”
For our resident ghost's birthday, the winner is "I'm not going to lie, it's cocaine: Florida man tries to eat stolen debit card, deputies say."
Pro tip: play this with guests at your next braai. It’s a guaranteed laugh and a great conversation starter.
Of course, Florida Man isn’t actually a single person but rather a trope of all the Florida men who’ve made headlines for doing something… unusual. Since these headlines almost always start with the words “Florida man”, the trope has since evolved into an almost mythical personality, a meme that captures the spirit of the bizarre.
Here are a few of my favourite Florida Man headlines from this year:
Which begs the question: what on earth is going on in Florida? Is it something in the water?
Not really, actually - Florida just happens to exist at the centre of a very odd Venn diagram. One contributor is the sheer size of the state and its equally massive population. Florida’s population stands at more than 21 million people, most of which are concentrated along the coastline or near the big theme parks. It stands to reason that when you put more people in a place (especially a hot, humid place), you’re going to end up with more crazy interactions between them.
Another contributor is something called the Sunshine Laws. Thanks to these, Florida is the state with the strongest public records laws. That makes it very easy for journalists in Florida to get their hands on police incident reports and churn out attention-grabbing stories practically in real time. It might well be that Florida experiences the same amount of shenanigans as any other state; we just read about them more frequently.
The final contributor is mental health. This is a huge issue in Florida, which ranks at the bottom of all states for mental health funding, according to the Florida Policy Institute. I guess that point speaks for itself.
I wish I could tell you that there was some more exciting answer, like mind-altering gasses rising off the Everglades or the government secretly testing drugs on the Floridian population by spiking their tap water.
Regardless of its somewhat ordinary origins, the legend of Florida Man lives on to spread chaos another day.