Good Morning, Do! Today is Monday, September 13 __________________________________________________ If you can spare a coin, PLEASE hit PayPal with it! ___________________________________________________  Man Drove 135mph With 2 Kids in Car  ___________________________________________________ Today, Sept 13 in 1977 The first American diesel automobiles were introduced by General Motors. ____________________________________________________ An education isn't how much you have committed to memory, or even how much you know. It's being able to differentiate between what you do know and what you don't. --- Anatole France (1844 - 1924) Do not condemn the judgement of another because it differs from your own. You may both be wrong. --- Dandemis ____________________________________________________ Johnny came home from school and told his dad: "Hey, Dad, I lerned that we decended from apes! Neat, huh ?" That didn't go over well at all, so Johnny was told in no uncertaint terms: "YOU might have apes for ancestors, but I sure don't!" ____________________________________________________   ____________________________________________________ Hiya! Your jokes has keep me smiling even when black cloudy days hangs over my head!..it kinda uplifts my spirit when I read through them each day! Many thanks for all the AWESOME JOKES I have received so far! *smiles* MacRo==== ____________________________________________________ Reported by Rock An INTERNATIONAL BONEHEAD AWARD has been earned by  Joshua Parent, 31, Route 101, New Hampshire, USA  Man Drove 135mph With 2 Kids in Car  A New Hampshire man was pulled over on Labor Day and arrested after allegedly driving 135mphwith two young kids in the car. Joshua Parent, 31, allegedly had two children under the age of five in the car with him when police stopped him on the state's Route 101 on Monday, the Union- Leader reports. He's been charged with reckless operation and child endangerment, along with other violations, CBS Boston reports. Extra patrols were added in the area for the holiday weekend, and more than 50 drivers were stopped. Of those, 11 were allegedly driving over 90mph.  ____________________________________________________ If you can help with the cost of the Humor Letter, please donate what you can! ______________________________________________________  From: Carmen Re: Extra Gmail account Dear Webby, Not your usual bimbo malfunction! This time it is my hubby. He finally decided to get his own gmail account instead of just mooching on mine. He used to have an account with Telus, but like with yours, they stole it and told him to go to hell and get a Gmail account. He was extremely UNhappy about that, as you can probably relate to. Since we both use the same computer, he naturally wants to have his gmail on it too, and not too far away, so that he can pull up mail, that he got or sent while pretending to be me. How does he do that? There does not seem to be an easy way for that. Carmen  Dear Carmen Yes, I can most definitely relate to how enraged your hubby was. To add an acount, look at the top right corner, where it shows your sexy mug shot. Click on that. About half way down inside that there is "Add Another Account". Hit that, and add him. It will probably be a bit of a struggle finding a suitable address, that is not in use yet, but you can use numbers. To jump from one account to the other, go in the same way, through the mug shot. Have FUN! DearWebby 
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 If "con" is the opposite of "pro," then what is the opposite of progress? ____________________________________________ You know you're old, ... if you can remember when bacon, eggs and sunshine were good for you. ____________________________________________ At Sunday school, the teacher asked Johnny, "Johnny, could you tell me what are we supposed to do to deserve the salvation?" "Yeah, of course" Little Johnny replied. "We're supposed to sin first so that we got something to be forgiven for!" ______________________________________________ 
 Ophelia Dingbatter's NewsNo sermon and not suitable for church, just jokes and fun for grownups. Read it on-line or subscribe. If you subscribe, look for the double opt-in confirmation request. 
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 Today, Sept 13, in 1759 The French were defeated by the British on the Plains of Abraham in the final French and Indian War. 1788 The Constitutional Convention decided that the first federal election was to be held on Wednesday the following February. On that day George Washington was elected as the first president of the United States. In addition, New York City was named the temporary national capital. 1789 The United States Government took out its first loan. 1847 U.S. forces took the hill Chapultepec during the Mexican-American War. 1862 During the American Civil War General Lee's Order No. 191 was found by federal soldiers in Maryland. 1898 Hannibal Williston Goodwin patented celluloid photographic film, which is used to make movies. 1922 In El Azizia, Libya, the highest shade temperature was recorded at 136.4 degrees Fahrenheit. 1935 Aviator Howard Hughes, Jr., of Houston, set a new airspeed record of 352 mph with his H-1 airplane (Winged Bullet). 1943 Chiang Kai-shek became the president of China. 1948 Margaret Chase Smith was elected to the U.S. Senate and became the first woman to serve in both houses of the U.S. Congress. 1959 The Soviet Union's Luna 2 became the first space probe to reach the moon. It was launched the day before. 1960 The U.S. Federal Communications Commission banned payola. 1970 The first New York City Marathon took place. Fireman Gary Muhrucke won the race. 1971 In New York, National Guardsmen stormed the Attica Correctional Facility and put an end to the four-day revolt. A total of 43 people were killed in the final assault. A committee was organized to investigate the riot on September 30, 1971. 1971 The World Hockey Association was formed. 1977 The first American diesel automobiles were introduced by General Motors. 1981 U.S. Secretary of State Alexander M. Haig said the U.S. had physical evidence that Russia and its allies used poisonous biological weapons in Laos, Cambodia and Afghanistan. 1988 Forecasters reported that Hurricane Gilbert's barometric pressure measured 26.13. It was the strongest hurricane ever recorded in the Western Hemisphere. 1993 Israel and Palestine signed their first major agreement. Palestine was granted limited self-government in the Gaza Strip and in Jericho. 1994 U.S. President Bill Clinton signed a $30 billion crime bill into law. 1998 The New York Times closed its Web site after hackers added offensive material. 2001 U.S. Secretary of State Colin Powell named Osama bin Laden as the prime suspect in the terror attacks on the United States on September 11, 2001. Limited commercial flights resumed in the U.S. for the first time in two days. 2021 Do smiled. 
 
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