Good Morning, Do! Today is Tuesday, May 11 ___________________________________________________ If you can spare a coin, PLEASE hit PayPal with it! ___________________________________________________  Man arrested in deadly 2011 stabbing of teenager  ___________________________________________________ Today, May 11 in 1910 Glacier National Park in Montana was established. ____________________________________________________ Never believe anything until it has been officially denied. --- Claud Cockburn (1904 - 1981) ____________________________________________________ At a local coffee bar, a young woman was expounding on her idea of the perfect mate to some of her friends: "The man I marry must be a shining light amongst company. He must be musical. Tell jokes. Sing. Entertain. And not bother me when I am not in the mood to be bothered!" An old granny overheard and spoke up, "Girl, if that's all you want, get a TV!" ____________________________________________________ The young man told his father, "I want to marry a beautiful woman, a good woman, a smart woman, one who'll be a good mother to our kids, a woman who will make me happy." His father told him he'd better make up his mind. ____________________________________________________   ____________________________________________________ "Your honour, " explained the young man, "I have to get married, please." "All right, what is your age?" "I'm 22, sir." "And the age of the bride?" "She's 15, sir." "15??? That's too young -- marrying you would be against the law!" "I see, " said the young man. "Could you try explaining that to the fella behind me, the one with with the shotgun?" ____________________________________________________ An INTERNATIONAL BONEHEAD AWARD has been earned by  Freddy Martinez, 32, Phoenix, Arizona, USA  Man arrested in deadly 2011 stabbing of teenager  Police have made an arrest in a deadly stabbing in Phoenix that left a 19-year-old teenager dead nearly 10 years ago. Thirty-two-year-old Freddy Martinez is facing several charges, including first-degree murder, second-degree murder and kidnapping. According to court documents, the stabbing happened on May 28, 2011 when three teens were walking in an area near 83rd Avenue and Lower Buckeye Road. A group of men reportedly pulled up in a white car, running out and chasing down the teenager. 19-year-old John Williams-Ryan, who was visiting from another state, was not able to escape and was beaten and stabbed to death. A DNA search last year led police to Martinez. "The victim may have scratched the suspect and managed to get the scrapings, and they can get plenty of skin samples from the suspect," said Sree Kanthaswamy, a professor in genetics and forensic science at Arizona State University. The teen victim's nail clippings had been kept for years. On January 2020, investigators had found a match in Arizona's DNA index system, leading them to Freddy Martinez. He was detained on May 3 and initially denied knowledge of the stabbing. Once police revealed his DNA had been found under the victim's fingernails, police say he admitted involvement in the attack. Martinez's bond has been set to $500,000, and his next hearing is May 11. 
 DearWebby's Tech Support Pits FROM: Reg RE: Best Conductor  Dear Webby This has nothing to do with the web, but I know you too have worked at ALCAN. What is the best conductor? Aluminum or copper, or what? I remember seeing those huge aluminum bus bars under the floor and the spots where they had a turn and tripped newbies walking above them, because a right angle turn was like a qurter turn of an electromgnetic coil and grabbed their steel toes enough to trip them. Obviously there was some almighty power going through those bus bars. Reg  Dear Reg Yes, I remember those bus bars and steering newbies over the spots, that tripped them. However, best conductor (aside from silver-oxide) is copper. Silver oxide is not practical to use beyond confusing students. Aluminum is second best of the practical ones. ALCAN uses aluminum bus bars and also aluminum wire from the Kemano power plant to the smelter in Kittimat, because they make aluminum themselves and would have to buy copper elsewhere. Have FUN! DearWebby 
 In the first year of marriage, the man speaks and the woman listens. In the second year, the woman speaks and the man listens. In the third year, they both speak and the neighbors listen. Later the lawyers speak and the judge listens. 
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 ===from Gennalyn -- thank you for giving me some words to help improve knowing my english. Gennalyn You are most welcome Gennalyn A number of schools in Asia and South America have written me that they use the Humor Letter in English classes. Your letter reminded me to get back to adding explanations when a joke uses the language in strange ways, like in the one following here: -------------------------------------- During an arctic training exercise in Alaska intense cold played havoc with vehicles and equipment. One harassed commander was trying to cope with vehicles that wouldn't run and machinery that wouldn't work. He was wondering what else could go wrong when the tent flap opened and a soldier rushed in to announce, "Hey, captain, the northern lights are out!" Exasperated and without looking, the captain barked, "Well, go get the generator mechanic and have him fix the @#$% lights!" ---- With northern lights the phrase "the lights are out" goes back a lot farther than electric lights, and actually means "the northern lights have come out from behind the clouds, they are visible." ___________________________________________ Ron has been telling his wife for 37 years that diamonds look tacky on younger women. So far, it has worked. ____________________________________________ A wife says to her husband one weekend morning, "We've got such a clever dog. He brings in the daily newspapers every morning." Her husband replied, "Well, lots of dogs can do that." The wife responded, "But we've never subscribed to any papers!" ___________________________________________________ 
 Ophelia Dingbatter's NewsNo sermon and not suitable for church, just jokes and fun for grownups. Read it on-line or subscribe. If you subscribe, look for the double opt-in confirmation request. 
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 Today, May 11 in 0330 Constantinople, previously the town of Byzantium, was founded. 1573 Henry of Anjou became the first elected king of Poland. 1647 Peter Stuyvesant arrived in New Amsterdam to become governor. 1689 French and English naval battle takes place at Bantry Bay. 1745 French forces defeat an Anglo-Dutch-Hanoverian army at Fontenoy. 1792 The Columbia River was discovered by Captain Robert Gray. 1812 British prime Minster Spencer Perceval was shot by a bankrupt banker in the lobby of the House of Commons. 1857 Indian mutineers seized Delhi from the British. 1889 Major Joseph Washington Wham takes charge of $28,000 in gold and silver to pay troops at various points in the Arizona Territory. The money was stolen in a train robbery. 1894 Workers at the Pullman Palace Car Company in Illinois went on strike. 1910 Glacier National Park in Montana was established. 1927 The Academy of Motion Picture Arts and Sciences was founded. 1934 A severe two-day dust storm stripped the topsoil from the great plains of the U.S. and created a "Dust Bowl." The storm was one of many. 1944 A major offensive was launched by the allied forces in central Italy. 1947 The creation of the tubeless tire was announced by the B.F. Goodrich Company. 1949 Siam changed its name to Thailand. 1960 Israeli soldiers captured Adolf Eichmann in Buenos Aires. 1995 The Nuclear Nonproliferation Treaty was extended indefinitely. The treaty limited the spread of nuclear material for military purposes. 1997 Garry Kasparov, world chess champion, lost his first ever multi-game match. He lost to IBM's chess computer Deep Blue. It was the first time a computer had beaten a world-champion player. 1998 India conducted its first underground nuclear tests, three of them, in 24 years. The tests were in violation of a global ban on nuclear testing. 1998 A French mint produced the first coins of Europe's single currency. The coin is known as the euro. 2000 India's population officially reached 1 billion. 2001 U.S. Attorney General John Ashcroft announced his decision to approve a 30-day delay of the execution of convicted Oklahoma City bomber Timothy McVeigh. McVeigh had been scheduled to be executed on May 16, 2001. The delay was because the Federal Bureau of Investigation (FBI) had failed to disclose thousands of documents to McVeigh's defense team. 2021 Do smiled. 
 
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