| Good Morning, Do! Today is Wednesday, April 26, 2023 ___________________________________________________ History: Today, April 26 in 1986, The worlds worst nuclear disaster to date occurred at Chernobyl, in Kiev. Thirty-one people died in the incident and thousands more were exposed to radioactive material. ___________________________________ Bonehead Award: Killer Clown admits 33 year old murder to avoid death penalty _____________________________________________________ Q Frisbeetarianism is the belief that when you die, your soul goes up on the roof and gets stuck. --- George Carlin (1937 - 2008) Indecision may or may not be my problem. --- Jimmy Buffett ______________________________________________________ Two friends and I were sitting in the outside area of bar & grill when a police car pulled a two-door car over right in front of the place. Both officers get out and we hear the cop closest to us say something about "They gotta be drunk!" The first cop approaches the car on the driver's side, the other cop on the passenger side. The first cop orders all the occupants out; there were 5. The second cop walks past the passenger door and waits. The front passenger gets out, then the back seat three. Then, the driver crawls over the console and out the passenger door. The driver is eyeing the first cop and nudges the second cop with his elbow -- without looking at who is behind him -- and with a drunken slur says "Jesh tell'em you wuz drivin'. I'm WAY too drunk!" ______________________________________________________ A Chicago lawyer named George successfully defends a major crime lord from charges of dealing drugs, racketeering, murder, kidnapping, and selling arms. As he is leaving the courtroom, an indignant old woman grabs him by the arm. "Young man, where are your Christian scruples? I believe you would defend Satan himself!" "I don't know," George says, "what has your kid done now?" ___________________________________________________ Thanks to Tamara for this picture: Blue Footed Booby ______________________________________________________ If you can help with the cost of the Humor Letter, please donate what you can! _____________________________________________________ A man who had just undergone a very complicated operation kept complaining about a bump on his head and a terrible headache. Since his operation had been an intestinal one, there was no earthly reason why he should be complaining of a headache. Finally his nurse, fearing that the man might be suffering from some post-operative shock, spoke to the doctor about it. The doctor assured the nurse, "Don't worry about a thing. He really does have a bump on his head. About halfway through the operation we ran out of anesthetic and had to gong him with the fire extinguisher." ___________________________________________________ If you can help with the cost of the Humor Letter, please donate what you can! _____________________________________________________ Events in the past may be roughly divided into those which probably never happened and those which do not matter. --- William Ralph Inge (1860 - 1954) _____________________________________________________ A Chicago lawyer named George successfully defends a major crime lord from charges of dealing drugs, racketeering, murder, kidnapping, and selling arms. As he is leaving the courtroom, an indignant old woman grabs him by the arm. "Young man, where are your Christian scruples? I believe you would defend Satan himself!" "I don't know," George says, "what has your kid done now?" ___________________________________________________ A man who had just undergone a very complicated operation kept complaining about a bump on his head and a terrible headache. Since his operation had been an intestinal one, there was no earthly reason why he should be complaining of a headache. Finally his nurse, fearing that the man might be suffering from some post-operative shock, spoke to the doctor about it. The doctor assured the nurse, "Don't worry about a thing. He really does have a bump on his head. About halfway through the operation we ran out of anesthetic and had to gong him with the fire extinguisher." ___________________________________________________ From: Richard Re: NOT for USA Utube downloader Dear Webby you recommended the Link to Dave today and it says not allowed in the US due to copyright laws??? Richard Hi Richard Try one from here: https://www.softwaretestinghelp.com/free-youtube-video-downloader The video streaming market is valued at about $25 billion. The most popular video streaming sites include YouTube, Netflix, Vimeo, Yahoo! Screen, and Daily Motion. By far the most popular platform is YouTube with over 2 billion monthly active users. Have FUN! DearWebby ___________________________________________________ What are the three fastest means of communication? 1) Internet 2) Telephone 3) Telawoman! __________________________________________________ If you can help with the cost of the Humor Letter, please donate what you can! _________________________________________________ Slim Robin ____________________________________________________ One of the world's greatest scientists was also recognized as the original absent-minded professor. One day, on board a train, he was unable to find his ticket. The conductor said, "Take it easy. You'll find it." When the conductor returned, the professor still couldn't find the ticket. The conductor, recognizing the famous scientist, said, "I'm sure you bought a ticket. Forget about it." "You're very kind," the professor said, "but I must find it, otherwise I won't know where to get off." _______________________________________________ An INTERNATIONAL BONEHEAD AWARD reported by Rock, has been earned by 30 year old picture Sheila Keen-Warren, 59, Abington, Virginia USA Killer Clown admits 33 year old murder to avoid death penalty Sheila Keen-Warren has admitted what authorities have suspected for more than 30 years: She was the person who, dressed as a clown and holding flowers and balloons, fatally shot a Florida woman on her doorstep in 1990. Keen-Warren pleaded guilty Tuesday to the second-degree murder of Marlene Warren and was sentenced to 12 years in prison, with credit for time served since her arrest in 2017, the Palm Beach Post reports. Under sentencing guidelines in place at the time of the murder and with time off for good behavior, Keen-Warren could be released in around 10 months, according to defense attorney Greg Rosenfeld. Without the plea deal, Keen-Warren, 59, would have faced a trial for first-degree murder. Rosenfeld, who claimed last year that his client was innocent and ready for her day in court, said she changed her plea because Florida wanted to execute her, reports WPTV. "They wanted to murder our client, and now she's going home in 10 months," he said. Keen-Warren, who had been having an affair with the victim's husband, had long been a suspect in the murder but she wasn't arrested until 27 years later when evidence was retested after advances in DNA technology. She married Marlene Warren's husband, Michael Warren, in 2002 and they were together when she was arrested. Marlene Warren, 40, had just finished breakfast with her 22-year-old son and his friends when she answered the door to the killer clown on May 26, 1990, authorities say. Palm Beach County State Attorney Dave Aronberg told WPTV that a big factor in the decision to seek a plea deal was the deaths of key witnesses. Keen-Warren "has finally been forced to admit that she was the one who dressed as a clown and took the life of an innocent victim," Aronberg said. "She will be a convicted murderer for the rest of her days." _____________________________________________________ Today, April 26 in 1478, Pazzi conspirators attacked Lorenzo and killed Giuliano de'Medici. 1514, Copernicus made his first observations of Saturn. 1607, The British established an American colony at Cape Henry, Virginia. It was the first permanent English establishment in the Western Hemisphere. 1819, The first Odd Fellows lodge in the U.S. was established in Baltimore, MD. 1865, Joseph E. Johnston surrendered the Army of Tennessee to Sherman during the American Civil War. 1865, John Wilkes Booth was killed by the U.S. Federal Cavalry. 1906, In Hawaii, motion pictures were shown for the first time. 1921, Weather broadcasts were heard for the first time on radio in St. Louis, MO. 1929, First non-stop flight from England to India was completed. 1931, NBC premiered "Lum and Abner." It was on the air for 24 years. 1937, German planes attacked Guernica, Spain, during the Spanish Civil War for the Spanish nationalist government against the Communists. This raid is considered one of the first to be attacks on a civilian population by a modern air force. The US quickly joined in, also on the same side as the Germans. 1941, An organ was played at a baseball stadium for the first time in Chicago, IL. 1945, Marshal Henri Philippe Petain, the head of France's Vichy government during World War II, was arrested. 1952, Patty Berg set a new record for major womens golf competition when she shot a 64 over 18 holes in a tournament in Richmond, CA. 1954, Grace Kelly was on the cover of "LIFE" magazine. 1964, The African nations of Tanganyika and Zanzibar merged to form Tanzania. 1968, Students seized the administration building at Ohio State University. 1982, The British announced that Argentina had surrendered on South Georgia. 1985, In Argentina, a fire at a mental hospital killed 79 people and injured 247. 1986, The worlds worst nuclear disaster to date occurred at Chernobyl, in Kiev. Thirty-one people died in the incident and thousands more were exposed to radioactive material. 1998, Auxiliary Bishop Juan Gerardi Conedera was bludgeoned to death two days after a report he'd compiled on atrocities during Guatemala's 36-year civil war was made public. 2000, Charles Wang and Sanjay Kumar purchased the NHL's New York Islanders. 2002, In Erfurt, Germany, an expelled student killed 17 people at his former school. The student then killed himself. 2023, Do smiled.
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