Good Morning, Do! Today is Monday, July 27 ___________________________________________________ Today, July 27 in  1921 Canadian biochemist Frederick Banting and associates announced the discovery of the hormone insulin.  _____________________________________________________ Today's Bonehead Award: Woman Tried To Hire Hitman Online  ______________________________________________________ Indecision may or may not be my problem. --- Jimmy Buffett Man is a credulous animal, and must believe something; in the absence of good grounds for belief, he will be satisfied with bad ones. --- Bertrand Russell (1872 - 1970) _____________________________________________________ After the church service, a little boy told the pastor, "When I grow up, I'm going to give you some money." "Well, thank you," the pastor replied, "but why?" "Because my daddy says you're the poorest preachers we've ever had." _____________________________________________________   OOOPS! ___________________________________________________ A wife invited some people to dinner. At the table, she turned to their six-year-old daughter and said, "Would you like to say the blessing?" "I wouldn't know what to say," the girl replied. "Just say what you hear Mommy say," the wife answered. The daughter bowed her head and said, "Lord, why on earth did I invite all these silly mooches to dinner?" ___________________________________________________  An INTERNATIONAL BONEHEAD AWARD has been earned by  Wendy Wein, 51, South Rockwood, Michigan, USA 
 Woman Tried To Hire Hitman Online 
 A Michigan woman who wanted her ex-husband murdered tried to hire a killer via the farcical web site rentahitman.com, police allege. According to investigators, Wendy Wein, 51, this month filled out a service request form on the site, which describes itself as your point & click solution and boasts of 17,985 U.S. Based Field Operatives. Site visitors are assured that Rent-A-Hitman is compliant with provisions of the 1964 Hitman Information Privacy & Protection Act (HIPPA). A recent update on Rent-A-Hitman noted that, We are still open during the COVID-19 pandemic, though our Wuhan offices will be working on a reduced schedule. The form Wein submitted to the web site identified her former spouse as the intended victim, prompting Rent-A- Hitmans operator to contact the Michigan State Police since it appeared Wein was serious about soliciting a murder. An undercover trooper subsequently met Wein in a parking lot near her home in South Rockwood, a village about 25 miles south of Detroit. Wein allegedly offered the supposed hitman $5000 to kill her ex, and gave him an upfront payment to cover travel expenses since the target lives in Tennessee. Wein was subsequently arrested and charged with murder solicitation and using a computer to commit a crime, both felonies. Pictured in the above mug shot, Wein was booked into the Monroe County jail on $500,000 bond. She is scheduled for a July 29 probable cause conference in District Court.  
 DearWebby's Tech Support Pits  From: Kay RE: Wipe machine?   Dear Webby, I would like to know if I can completely wipe a computer clean then start all over programming it. It is an older PC and I think it has a virus. Would like to start from scratch with it. Thank you for all of your help, Kay  Dear Kay Unless you have the Windows Set-up CD, don't do that. Get Malwarebytes from http://webby.com/malwarebytes Clean it with that first. Then get Should I Remove It It will list every program and tell you whether it is worth keeping, or whether you should remove it. It even helps you remove them. Finally, run CrapCleaner. After that the machine will run almost like it did when it was brand new. With some machines there is a copy of Windows in a secret partition, and you can do a "Restore to factory preset". Chat the company that made it, and ask them how to do a factory reset on that particular machine. They will, of course, try to talk you into buying a new machine, but if you are firm, then they will tell you. Keep in mind, new machines are infected with W10 ! You would NOT like that at all! So, first try the clean-up. If that is not good enough, then do a Factory reset. That does a total format and then re-installs the original Windows, and also all the crap they put on as "Freebies", like Snorton,Windoze Office trial, etc. All of that you can get rid of with Should I Remove It Have FUN! DearWebby 
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 A Sunday school class was studying the Ten Commandments. They were ready to discuss the last one. The teacher asked if anyone could tell her what it was. Susie raised her hand, stood tall, and quoted, "Thou shallt not take the covers off the neighbor's wife." _____________________________________________ At Sunday School they were teaching how God created everything, including human beings. Little Johnny, a child in the kindergarten class, seemed especially intent when they told him how Eve was created out of one of Adam's ribs. Later in the week his mother noticed him lying as though he was ill, and said, "Johnny what is the matter?" Little Johnny responded, "I have a pain in my side. I think I'm going to have a wife!" ____________________________________________ A man finds his seat in the theater, but it's too far from the stage. He whispers to the usher, "This is a mystery and I have to watch a mystery close up. Get me a better seat, and I'll give you a handsome tip." The usher moves him to the second row, and the man hands the usher a quarter. The usher looks at the quarter and then leans over and whispers, "The wife did it." 
 Ophelia Dingbatter's NewsNo sermon and not suitable for church, just jokes and fun for grownups. Read it on-line or subscribe. If you subscribe, look for the double opt-in confirmation request. 
 ___________________________________________________  
 Today July 27 in 1214 At the Battle of Bouvines in France, Philip Augustus of France defeated John of England. 1245 Frederick II was deposed by a council at Lyons after they found him guilty of sacrilege. 1663 The British Parliament passed a second Navigation Act, which required all goods bound for the colonies be sent in British ships from British ports. 1689 Government forces defeated the Scottish Jacobites at the Battle of Killiecrankie. 1777 The marquis of Lafayette arrived in New England to help the rebellious American colonists fight the British. 1778 The British and French fleets fought to a standoff in the first Battle of Ushant. 1866 Cyrus Field successfully completed the Atlantic Cable. It was an underwater telegraph from North America to Europe. 1909 Orville Wright set a record for the longest airplane flight. He was testing the first Army airplane and kept it in the air for 1 hour 12 minutes and 40 seconds. 1914 British troops invaded the streets of Dublin, Ireland, and began to disarm Irish rebels. 1918 The Socony 200 was launched. It was the first concrete barge and was used to carry oil. 1921 Canadian biochemist Frederick Banting and associates announced the discovery of the hormone insulin. 1940 Bugs Bunny made his official debut in the Warner Bros. animated cartoon "A Wild Hare." 1944 U.S. troops completed the liberation of Guam. 1947 The World Water Ski Organization was founded in Geneva, Switzerland. 1953 The armistice agreement that ended the Korean War was signed at Panmunjon, Korea. 1955 The Allied occupation of Austria ended. I remember that! Rationing ended and all us kids got our first hot dog. I was 6. 1964 U.S. President Lyndon Johnson sent an additional 5,000 advisers to South Vietnam. 1965 In the U.S., the Federal Cigarette Labeling and Advertising Act was signed into law. The law required health warnings on all cigarette packages. 1967 U.S. President Johnson appointed the Kerner Commission to assess the causes of the violence in the wake of urban rioting. 1974 The U.S. Congress asked for impeachment procedures against President Richard Nixon. 1980 The deposed shah of Iran, Muhammad Riza Pahlavi, died in a hospital near Cairo, Egypt. 1993 IBM's new chairman, Louis V. Gerstner, Jr., announced an $8.9 billion plan to cut the company's costs. 1999 The U.S. space shuttle Discovery completed a five-day mission commanded by Air Force Col. Eileen Collins. It was the first shuttle mission to be commanded by a woman. 2003 It was reported by the BBC (British Broadcasting Corp.) that there was no monster in Loch Ness. The investigation used 600 separate sonar beams and satellite navigation technology to trawl the loch. Reports of sightings of the "Loch Ness Monster" began in the 6th century. 2006 Intel Corp introduced its Core 2 Duo microprocessors. 2020 Do smiled. 

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