Good Morning, Do! Today is Saturday, July 17 ___________________________________________________ If you can spare a coin, PLEASE hit PayPal with it! ___________________________________________________ Louisiana man stole ring to make down-payment on engagement ring ___________________________________________________ Today, July 17 in 1966 Ho Chi Minh ordered a partial mobilization of North Vietnam forces to defend against American air strikes. ____________________________________________________ Thirty-five is a very attractive age. London society is full of women of the very highest birth who have, of their own free choice, remained thirty-five for years. --- Oscar Wilde (1854 - 1900) ____________________________________________________ A small, uncertain, and nervous witness was being cross- examined. The lawyer thundered at him: "Have you ever been married?" "Yes, sir," said the witness in a low voice. "Once." "Whom did you marry?" "Well, a woman." The lawyer said angrily, "Of course you married a woman. Did you ever hear of anyone marrying a man?" And the witness said meekly, "MY mother did." ____________________________________________________ First mouse ____________________________________________________ A traveling evangelist always put on a grand finale at his revival meetings, When he was to preach at a church, he would secretly hire a small boy to sit in the ceiling rafters with a dove in a cage. Toward the end of his sermon, the preacher would shout for the Holy Spirit to come down, and the boy in the rafters would dutifully release the dove. At one revival meeting, however, nothing happened when the preacher called for the Holy Spirit to desend. He again raised his arms and exclaimed: "Come down, Holy Spirit!" Still no sign of the dove. The preacher then heard the anxious voice of a small boy call down from the rafters: "Sir, a big black cat just ate the Holy Spirit. Shall I throw down the cat?" ____________________________________________________ Reported by Rock An INTERNATIONAL BONEHEAD AWARD has been earned by Justin Pope, 29, Downsville, Louisiana, USA Louisiana man stole ring to make down-payment on engagement ring A Louisiana man has admitted to stealing and pawning a $4500 ring owned by his girlfriend and then using the ill-gotten proceeds for a down payment on an engagement ring for the same woman, police say. Justin Pope, 29, was arrested yesterday for the theft of a ring that belonged to Samantha Futch, 40. Pope allegedly stole the ring in mid-2019 from Futchs residence in Downsville, a village about 25 miles from Monroe. According to a probable cause affidavit, Pope yesterday confessed to taking a ring that belonged to his then- girlfriend. Pope told investigators that he sold the ring at a local pawn shop, then used the money for a down payment on an engagement ring for her. The stolen ring, cops reported, was valued at $4499. The affidavit does not reveal how Pope, seen above, was identified as a suspect (or why it took two years for an arrest). Pope told Ouachita Parish Sheriffs Office deputies that he sought to retrieve the ring a month after pawning it, only to learn that it had been melted for scrap. The court filing lists separate addresses for Pope and Futch, so it appears the pair is no longer a couple. Pope, who does not have a criminal record, is free on $500 bond. DearWebby's tech support pits from: Russ Re: Save Pictures Dear Webby Thanks for the all the great humor and especially the technical information over the years. Youre still the best. Do you know of some trick or piece of software that would help me save my precious photos but reduce them down in size, halving them would be a good start, smaller even better. These blasted phones are creating larger and larger photos. I have my camera on the smallest setting which is 6MP. This creates photos in the 2-3MB range when a 400K photo would do nicely in most circumstances. Im running out of backup space on my laptop and do not want to jump through any more hoops. I know theres software that will do what I want one at a time but Id like to do it a directory/folder at a time! Help if you can. Thanks for listening. At least Im getting it off my chest. Russ Dear Russ Dear Russ It CAN be done with just Windows alone, but: 1) it is a silly rigamarole 2) sooner or later you will wish you had not done that. The procedure is at https://www.technipages.com/resize-multiple-images-at- once What I would recommend instead is that you get one or more camera chips. For example WISH has 128 GIGAbyte camera chips for $5.78 That is probably a lot bigger than your hard disk. Then just get a zip lock baggie, attach it to the monitor or the wall, and put the chip in there. Of course, any convenient safe storage place will do fine. You can even be a big spender, and get two chips, and put one into your bank deposit box. To load it, stick the chip into a chip slot on the computer or into a $9 chip reader, then use SEARCH EVERYTHING, search for pictures, CTRL A to select all, and drag them to the chip. No need to trash them down to smaller size, or do anything, that you WILL regret. Have FUN! DearWebby Every morning Custer rode thru the Indian Reservation on his horse accompanied by his faithful Indian scout. And every morning as he rode past the Indian chief he was greeted with the gesture of first a finger raised vertically - then the finger thrust horizontally. Eventually Custer said to his scout "I think I know what the chief means by the vertical finger, but what's the significance of the horizontal one?". The scout replied "He doesn't like your horse either!" | If you can help with the cost of the Humor Letter, please donate what you can! | If you like my work,
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_____________________________________________ A gentleman goes to an estate sale and notices that one of the items for sale is a large parrot. He's always wanted a talking bird, so when it comes up for bid he offers $50. The bidding proceeds hot and heavy with someone always bidding ten dollars more than he until the parrot is finally sold to him for $1,500. When he goes to get the bird, he asks the auctioneer, "Can the bird talk?" The auctioneer replied, "Who do you think was bidding against you?" ____________________________________________ This following event, reported by our subscriber Sheila has not made it to the official bonehead awards yet, but is definitely a candidate. Thanks to Sheila for telling us first! A trailer park in Semmes, Alabama was broken into on May 3. The thieves stole a computer and jewelry from one trailer, TV and stereo from another, and even got away with radios and CD players out of cars. When the cops asked the manager of the park if he was broken into too, he said: "Yeah my office, and they pried my lock open with their drivers license, and left half of it in my door." ____________________________________________ She left him on the sofa when the phone rang, and was back in a few seconds. "Who was it?" he asked. "My husband," she replied. "I better get going," he said. "Where was he?" "Relax. He's downtown playing poker with you." ______________________________________________ | Ophelia Dingbatter's NewsNo sermon and not suitable for church, just jokes and fun for grownups. Read it on-line or subscribe. If you subscribe, look for the double opt-in confirmation request. |
___________________________________________________ | Today, July 17, in 1212 The Moslems were crushed in the Spanish crusade. 1453 France defeated England at Castillon, France, which ended the 100 Years' War. 1785 France limited the importation of goods from Britain. 1815 Napoleon Bonaparte surrendered to the British at Rochefort, France. 1821 Spain ceded Florida to the U.S. 1862 National cemeteries were authorized by the U.S. government. 1866 Authorization was given to build a tunnel beneath the Chicago River. The three-year project cost $512,709. 1898 U.S. troops under General William R. Shafter took Santiago de Cuba during the Spanish-American War. 1917 The British royal family changed their german name to Windsor. 1941 Brigadier General Soervell directed Architect G. Edwin Bergstrom to have basic plans and architectural perspectives for an office building that could house 40,000 War Department employees on his desk by the following Monday morning. The building became known as the Pentagon. 1945 U.S. President Truman, Soviet leader Josef Stalin and British Prime Minister Winston S. Churchill began meeting at Potsdam in the final Allied summit of World War II. During the meeting Stalin made the comment that "Hitler had escaped." 1946 Chinese communists opened a drive against the Nationalist army on the Yangtze River. 1960 Francis Gary Powers pled guilty to spying charges in a Moscow court after his U-2 spy plane was shot down over the Soviet Union. 1966 Ho Chi Minh ordered a partial mobilization of North Vietnam forces to defend against American air strikes. 1975 An Apollo spaceship docked with a Soyuz spacecraft in orbit. It was the first link up between the U.S. and Soviet Union. 1979 Nicaraguan President Anastasio Somoza resigned and fled to Miami in exile. (Florida) 1986 The largest bankruptcy filing in U.S. history took place when LTV Corporation asked for court protection from more than 20,000 creditors. LTV Corp. had debts in excess of $4 billion. 1987 Lieutenant Colonel Oliver North and rear Admiral John Poindexter begin testifying to Congress at the "Iran-Contra" hearings. 1997 After 117 years, the Woolworth Corp. closed its last 400 stores. 1998 Biologists reported that they had deciphered the genome (genetic map) of the syphilis bacterium. 2008 In China, construction of the Shanghai World Financial Center was completed. 2021 Do smiled. |
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