Good Morning, Do! Today is Tuesday, February 15 ___________________________________________________ If you can spare a coin, PLEASE hit PayPal with it! ___________________________________________________ Today, February 14, in 1903, Morris and Rose Michtom, Russian immigrants, introduced the first teddy bear in America. ___________________________________________________ Bonehead Award Pastor Was Killed by Woman sitting on her in 'Prayer Position' ___________________________________________________ Things are more like they are now than they ever were before. --- Dwight D. Eisenhower (1890 - 1969) ___________________________________________________ GiveSendGo@GiveSendGo Know this! Canada has absolutely ZERO jurisdiction over how we manage our funds here at GiveSendGo. All funds for EVERY campaign on GiveSendGo flow directly to the recipients of those campaigns, not least of which is The  Freedom Convoy campaign. ___________________________________________________ A robber went to the bank and pointed a gun on the cashier and said, "Give me all your money, or you'll be GEOGRAPHY!" The cashier laughed and said, "You mean to say HISTORY." The burglar answered, "Dangit, don't change the *subject*!" ____________________________________________________   Elidrissi Fossa, Madagascar ____________________________________________________ A store manager overheard a clerk saying to a customer, "No, ma'am, we haven't had any for quite some time now, and it doesn't look as if we'll be getting any more." Alarmed by what was being said, the manager rushed over to the customer who was walking out the door and said, "That isn't true, ma'am. Of course, we'll have some soon. In fact, I personally placed an order for them just a couple of days ago." Then the manager drew the clerk aside and growled, "Never, never, never, never say we don't have something. If we don't have it, say we ordered it and it's on its way. Now, what was it she asked if we had any?" "Rapes in the underground parking area." ____________________________________________________ Reported by Rock An INTERNATIONAL BONEHEAD AWARD has been earned by  Gloria Ann Jordan, 41, Wichita Falls, Texas, USA  Pastor Was Killed by Woman sitting on her in 'Prayer Position'  A woman in Texas was arrested this week after she allegedly killed one of her roommates by sitting on her until she suffocated. Gloria Ann Jordan, 41, was taken into custody on Tuesday and charged with one count of manslaughter, jail records reviewed by Law&Crime say. Officers with the Wichita Falls Police Department on Nov. 21, 2021 responded to a call about an unresponsive woman at a home located in the 1100 block of Las Cruces Lane, Wichita Falls CBS/CW affiliate KAUZ-TV reported. The home was shared reportedly by Jordan, Gloria Farmer, and a third roommate whose name was not disclosed. Upon arriving at the scene in November, first responders discovered Farmers body, and it was initially concluded that her death was medical in nature, KAUZ reported. It wasnt until a family friend of Farmers reportedly went to police and reported concerns with the circumstances of her death that a follow-up investigation was ordered. The report did not detail what concerned the family friend. Investigators began by questioning Farmer and Jordans roommate for a second time. During the second interview, the roommate reportedly admitted that Jordan may have killed Farmer by sitting on her. She reportedly told police that she failed to mention anything during the initial interview because she feared Jordan. Per the report, the roommate told police that Farmer was sitting in an office chair when Jordan put her hand on Farmers forehead and pushed backwards, tipping her and the chair over backwards and onto the floor. The roommate reportedly said that Jordan was praying when she pushed Farmer over. Farmer was reportedly on her back and on the floor when the 170-pound Jordan allegedly sat on her chest, straddling her body. Farmer repeatedly told Jordan to get off her because she couldnt breathe, the roommate reportedly told police, but Jordan refused. The roommate reportedly said she tried to help Farmer but was unable to move Jordan, who sat on Farmers chest until the victim stopped breathing. A medical examiner conducted an autopsy and determined that Farmers manner of death was homicide and the cause of death was mechanical asphyxiation. Investigators on Nov. 24 questioned Jordan for a second time. During the interview, Jordan allegedly said that she tipped Farmer over in the office chair and admitted to straddling her body in a prayer position. She said she had her hands on Farmers forehead during the incident but then refused to respond to any additional questions, according to the report. Officers with the Burkburnett Police Department, which is about 20 miles north of Wichita Falls, took Jordan into custody Tuesday. She is currently being held in the Wichita County Jail. A judge set her bond at $150,000, online jail records show. Those records also show that Jordan was arrested on Nov. 26 and charged with assault causing bodily injury in a family violence incident. She was released two days later after posting a surety bond of $2,500. Per KAUZ, Jordan allegedly became violent after a woman refused to drive her to Dallas approximately 140 miles southeast of Wichita Falls because Jordan would not agree to pay for gas. Jordan allegedly slammed the womans head into a wall several times and shouted, I rebuke you in the name of the Lord.  ____________________________________________________ If you can help with the cost of the Humor Letter, please donate what you can! ______________________________________________________  From: Dan Re: Covid19 scam Dear Webby I got a Facebook message from a friend, who does not normally fall for scams, about signing up for some grants. What really irked me was Nigerian grammar. I am a teacher and "don't go fer dat sheet." So I reported to FB that Len's account has been hacked. FB promptly blocked me, indicating that it is some inside con job. So I dug out my most vile and most memorable insults, and pasted them to the scammer. While that did not help, it made me feel better. What should I do next? Dan  Dear Dan Send an email to your friend and tell him all about it. Since it is an inside job, tell him to start a new account and slowly copy all his stuff over. With any luck he does not have too much anyway. Scammers usually go after dormant or rarely used accounts. Once the transfers are completed, he can send Friend requests to all his friends, who are still alive. If your friend is a fart smella, he will still have a Skype account. Those are very rarely hacked, and you can use it to inform him and help him transfer his stuff. Have FUN! DearWebby 
 A New Yorker was being shown around the back country of Louisiana by his cousin. "Is it true that an alligator won't attack you if you carry a flashlight?" he asked. The cousin smirked, "Depends on how fast ya carry it." 
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 _____________________________________________  During a county-wide drive to round up all unlicensed dogs, a patrolman signaled a car to pull over to the curb. When Bubba asked why he had been stopped, the officer pointed to the big dog sitting on the seat beside him. "Does your dog have a license?" he asked. "No way," Bubba said, "Ol' Blue don't need none. He's getting too shortsighted fer doin' the drivin'." ______________________________________________ A little boy was afraid of the dark. One night his mother told him to go out to the back porch and bring her the broom. The little boy turned to his mother and said, "Mama, I don't want to go out there. It's dark." The mother smiled reassuringly at her son. "You don't have to be afraid of the dark," she explained. "Jesus is out there. He'll look after you and protect you." The little boy looked at his mother real hard and asked, "Are you sure He's out there?" "Yes, I'm sure. He is everywhere, and He is always ready to help you when you need Him," she said. The little boy thought about that for a minute and then went to the back door and cracked it a little. Peering out into the darkness, he called, "Jesus? If you're out there, would you please hand me the broom?" ______________________________________________ 
 Ophelia Dingbatter's NewsNo sermon and not suitable for church, just jokes and fun for grownups. Read it on-line or subscribe. If you subscribe, look for the double opt-in confirmation request. 
 A California girl walked up to the information desk in her local hospital and said, "I need to see the upturn, please." "I think, you mean the 'intern,' don't you?" asked the nurse on duty. "Yes,whatever." said the girl. "I want to have a 'contamination.'" "Don't you mean 'examination ?" the nurse asked. "Yes, whatever. I'll probably have to go to the fraternity ward" "I'm sure you mean the maternity ward." To which the girl replied "Upturn, intern; contamination, examination; fraternity, maternity.... What's the difference? All I know is I haven't demonstrated in two months, and I think I'm stagnant." ___________________________________________________  
 Today, February 15, in 1758, Mustard was advertised for the first time in America. 1764, The city of St. Louis was established. 1799, Printed ballots were authorized for use in elections in the state of Pennsylvania. 1842, Adhesive postage stamps were used for the first time by the City Dispatch Post (Office) in New York City. 1879, U.S. President Hayes signed a bill that allowed female attorneys to argue cases before the U.S. Supreme Court. 1898, The USS Maine sank when it exploded in Havana Harbor for unknown reasons. More than 260 crew members were killed. 1900, The British threaten to use natives in their war with the Boers. 1903, Morris and Rose Michtom, Russian immigrants, introduced the first teddy bear in America. 1932, George Burns and Gracie Allen debuted as regulars on "The Guy Lombardo Show" on CBS radio. 1933, U.S. President-elect Franklin Roosevelt escaped an assination attempt in Miami. Chicago Mayor Anton J. Cermak was killed in the attack. 1942, During World War II, Singapore surrendered to the Japanese. 1946, Edith Houghton, at age 33, was signed as a baseball scout by the Philadelphia Phillies becoming the first female scout in the major leagues. 1953, The first American to win the womens world figure skating championship was 17-year-old Tenley Albright. 1961, A Boeing 707 crashed in Belgium killing 73 people. 1962, CBS-TV bought the exclusive rights to college football games from the National Collegiate Athletic Association (NCAA) for a figure of $10,200,000. 1965, Canada displayed its new red and white maple leaf flag. The flag was to replace the old Red Ensign standard. 1982, During a storm, the Ocean Ranger, a drilling rig, sank off the coast of Newfoundland. 84 men were killed. 1985, The Center for Disease Control reported that more than half of all nine-year-olds in the U.S. showed no sign of tooth decay. 1989, After nine years of intervention, the Soviet Union announced that the remainder of its troops had left Afghanistan. 1991, The leaders of Czechoslovakia, Hungary and Poland signed the Visegard agreement, in which they pledged to cooperate in transforming thier countries to free-market economies. 1995, The FBI arrested Kevin Mitnick and charged him with cracking security in some of the nation's most protected computers. He served five years in jail. 2002, U.S. President George W. Bush approved Nevada's Yucca Mountain as a site for long-term disposal of radioactive nuclear waste. The democrats stopped that project a few years later because they did not want Bush to take the credit for it. 2017, The Indian space rocket PSLV-C37 successfully launched 104 satellites in a single flight. 2021 Do smiled. 

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