Good Morning, Do! Today is Thursday, June 25 ___________________________________________________ Today, June 25 in 1867 Lucien B. Smith patented the first barbed wire. 1950 North Korea invaded South Korea initiating the Korean War. _____________________________________________________ Today's Bonehead Award: Driver who fled deadly crash scene under arrest ______________________________________________________ | If you can help with the cost of the Humor Letter, please donate what you can! | |
_____________________________________________________ Fools rush in where fools have been before. --- Socratex _____________________________________________________ Sam and Greg were sitting in a bar having a drink complaining about the heat, the cows and their wives. They weren't exactly the brightest guys, and neither were their comments. Everyday they said pretty much the same thing. And it always ended in a pissing contest over who had the worst wife. Today though something was different. There was a wise looking elderly Indian Chief sitting at the bar. They decided to ask him to decide, who had the worst wife. Sam complained that his wife was always arguing with him. No matter what he said, she always said the opposite. She didn't just say it either, she said it so loud that the neighbors complained. The old Chief listened attentively and then said, "If your wife was Indian, we would name her Fire-Water. Every time she opens her mouth she breathes fire and your knees turn to water." Greg said "My wife is so bad that we haven't hadn't had physical relations in darn near twenty years." The chief again listened attentively and pronounced Greg's wife as "Sleeping-Dragon. If you try to touch her while she is sleeping, she will become a dragon and bite your head off." Sam and Greg had a good laugh over their wives new names. Then Sam asked, "Okay, them Indian names are pretty cool, but.... Who has the worst wife?" The chief replied, "I do. My wife is Whumpo Havo Noja" Both Sam and Greg looked very confused, and so the chief explained, "That's my wife's Indian name, it translates in English to "Three-Old-Horses." More puzzled than ever before Sam asked, "Yeah, but what does it (Three-Old-Horses) mean? The chief sighed, took a sip of his beer and said , "Nag, Nag, Nag." _____________________________________________________ ___________________________________________________ Three animals in a bar was having a huge argument over who was the best. The first animal, a hawk, claimed that because of his ability to fly, he could attack anything repeatedly from above, and his prey had hardly a chance. The second, a lion, based his claim on his strength. No one in the jungle dared to challenge him, King of the Jungle. The third, a skunk, insisted he needed neither flight nor strength to frighten off any creature with his unique arsenal. As the three debated the issue, a grizzly bear came along and swallowed them all; hawk, lion and stinker! ___________________________________________________ An INTERNATIONAL BONEHEAD AWARD has been earned by Miguel Burgos, 27, Hartford, Connecticut, USA Driver who fled deadly crash scene under arrest Miguel Burgos of Hartford was arrested after a high-speed crash during which he drove into a utility pole, cutting the car in half, police say. He fled the scene, leaving his female passenger to die alone. Police have arrested a man who they said slammed a stolen car into a utility pole in Hartford -- splitting it in half -- and fled the scene, leaving his female passenger to die alone. Miguel Burgos, 27, of Arlington Street in Hartford was arrested late Monday afternoon and charged with second- degree manslaughter, reckless endangerment, driving without a license and third-degree larceny among others, police said. He was in custody overnight on $325,000 bail. Liza Ramos, 34, died in the crash, which happened about 7:40 p.m. Friday near 401 Flatbush Ave. Investigators learned that the 2006 Nissan Altima, which had been reported stolen from someone in New Britain the day before, had been speeding west on Flatbush when it slammed into the pole on the south side of the road, police said. The force of the impact cut the car in half and threw Ramos. Police said witnesses told officers that the driver ran from the scene, leaving the critically-injured woman. During an investigation that Lt. Paul Cicero called extensive, detectives from the Crime Scene Division identified Burgos as a suspect and obtained a warrant for his arrest. Burgos other charges are reckless driving, evading responsibility and second-degree criminal trover, police said. (Trover is trashing a stolen vehicle) DeaWebby's Tech Support Pits From: Anna Re: Typical spam/scam Dear Webby I get an awful lot of scam email. I need a few tips to help me identify them, without getting infected. Anna Dear Anna First and foremost I would recommend that you get Mailwasher I have used and recommended MailWasher since Nick Bolton created it in the mid 90s. With the Humor Letter being read by 10,000 or more people every day, If there had been ONE person, who had an unsatisfactory experience with it, or a complaint, I would have heard about it. No complaints whatsoever. Everybody who tried it, loves it. Since I have not changed my address, humor@webby.com since 1994, it is on every spammer's CD. So what? Mailwasher takes care of the spam. Most of the spam and scam is recognized right out of the box. In addition to that, you can make filters. Gmail copied that feature, or part of them. With mailWasher you can pull down filter conditions like "IF ..., but not IF ...", and all kinds of devious tricks. Scammers simply don't have a chance. You can set it to just mark bad stuff for deletion, and allow you one last look at it, or just dump it right on the server, sent to hell without any human ever seeing it. For example, if you get an email from an AOL address, and it has INVOICE, then you KNOW it is phony. Legitimate businesses don't have AOL or Hotmail addresses. So it is quite safe to dump emails like that straight to hell, automatically, without even listing them. You can also use filters to safeguard some mails. You can play with the conditions and dump all mails from your former college, BUT NOT if there is "George" in the header somewhere. Making filters is a strategy game, and YOU have all the weapons. It is actually fun! Any spam or scam that gets through, you take notice. If there is ever a second one some day, then you make a filter. Have FUN! DearWebby
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____________________________________________________ _____________________________________________ Three animals in a bar was having a huge argument over who was the best. The first animal, a hawk, claimed that because of his ability to fly, he could attack anything repeatedly from above, and his prey had hardly a chance. The second, a lion, based his claim on his strength. No one in the jungle dared to challenge him, King of the Jungle. The third, a skunk, insisted he needed neither flight nor strength to frighten off any creature with his unique arsenal. As the three debated the issue, a grizzly bear came along and swallowed them all; hawk, lion and stinker! _____________________________________________ "Doc," said the young man lying down on the couch, "You've got to help me! Every night I have the same horrible dream. I'm lying in bed when all of the sudden five women rush in and start tearing off my clothes." The psychiatrist nodded, "And what do you do?" "I push them away." "I see. What do you want me to do?" The patient implored. "Break my arms." ____________________________________________ >From Eleanor In my teens, friends would ask, "Who are you going out with this weekend?" In my 20's, relatives would say, "Who are you dating?" In my 30's, co-workers might inquire, "So, are you dating anyone?" Now people ask, "Where did you get that adorable purse?" | Ophelia Dingbatter's NewsNo sermon and not suitable for church, just jokes and fun for grownups. Read it on-line or subscribe. If you subscribe, look for the double opt-in confirmation request. |
___________________________________________________ | Today June 25 in 0841 Charles the Bald and Louis the German defeated Lothar at Fontenay. 1080 At Brixen, a council of bishops declared Pope Gregory to be deposed and Archbishop Guibert as antipope Clement III. 1580 The Book of Concord was first published. The book is a collection of doctrinal standards of the Lutheran Church. 1658 Aurangzeb proclaimed himself emperor of the Moghuls in India. 1767 Mexican Indians rioted as Jesuit priests were ordered home. 1864 Union troops surrounding Petersburg, VA, began building a mine tunnel underneath the Confederate lines. 1867 Lucien B. Smith patented the first barbed wire. 1868 The U.S. Congress enacted legislation granting an eight-hour day to workers employed by the Federal government. 1870 In Spain, Queen Isabella abdicated in favor of Alfonso XII. 1876 Lt. Col. Custer and the 210 men of U.S. 7th Cavalry were killed by Sioux and Cheyenne Indians at Little Big Horn in Montana. The event is known as "Custer's Last Stand." 1876 In Philadelphia, PA, Alexander Graham Bell demonstrated the telephone for Sir William Thomson (Baron Kelvin) and Emperor Pedro II of Brazil at the Centennial Exhibition. 1917 The first American fighting troops landed in France. 1920 The Greeks took 8,000 Turkish prisoners in Smyrna. 1921 Samuel Gompers was elected head of the AFL for the 40th time. 1938 Gaelic scholar Douglas Hyde was inaugurated as the first president of the Irish Republic. 1941 Finland declared war on the Soviet Union. 1946 Ho Chi Minh traveled to France for talks on Vietnamese independence. 1948 The Soviet Union tightened its blockade of Berlin by intercepting river barges heading for the city. 1950 North Korea invaded South Korea initiating the Korean War. 1951 In New York, the first regular commercial color TV transmissions were presented on CBS using the FCC-approved CBS Color System. The public did not own color TV's at the time. 1959 The Cuban government seized 2.35 million acres under a new agrarian reform law. 1959 Eamon De Valera became president of Ireland at the age of 76. 1962 The U.S. Supreme Court ruled that the use of unofficial non-denominational prayer in public schools was unconstitutional. 1964 U.S. President Lyndon Johnson ordered 200 naval personnel to Mississippi to assist in finding three missing civil rights workers. 1970 The U.S. Federal Communications Commission handed down a ruling (35 FR 7732), making it illegal for radio stations to put telephone calls on the air without the permission of the person being called. 1973 Erskine Childers Jr. became president of Ireland after the retirement of Eamon De Valera. 1975 Mozambique became independent. Samora Machel was sworn in as president after 477 years of Portuguese rule. 1981 The U.S. Supreme Court decided that male-only draft registration was constitutional. 1987 Austrian President Kurt Waldheim visited Pope John Paul II at the Vatican. The meeting was controversial due to allegations that Waldheim had hidden his Nazi past. 1990 The U.S. Supreme Court upheld the right of an individual, whose wishes are clearly made, to refuse life- sustaining medical treatment. "The right to die" decision was made in the Curzan vs. Missouri case. 1991 The last Soviet troops left Czechoslovakia 23 years after the Warsaw Pact invasion. 1991 The Yugoslav republics of Slovenia and Croatia declared their independence from Yugoslavia. 1993 Kim Campbell took office as Canada's first woman prime minister. She assumed power upon the resignation of Brian Mulroney. 1997 The Russian space station Mir was hit by an unmanned cargo vessel. Much of the power supply was knocked out and the station's Spektr module was severely damaged. 1997 U.S. air pollution standards were significantly tightened by U.S. President Clinton. 1998 The U.S. Supreme Court rejected the line-item veto thereby striking down presidential power to cancel specific items in tax and spending legislation. 1998 The U.S. Supreme Court ruled that those infected with HIV are protected by the Americans With Disabilities Act. 1998 Microsoft's "Windows 98" was released to the public. 2000 U.S. and British researchers announced that they had completed a rough draft of a map of the genetic makeup of human beings. The project was 10 years old at the time of the announcement. 2000 A Florida judge approved a class-action lawsuit to be filed against America Online (AOL) on behalf of hourly subscribers who were forced to view "pop-up" advertisements. 2020 Do smiled. |
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