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___________________________________________________ History: on this day, December 24, in 1223, St. Francis of Assisi assembled one of the first Nativity scenes, in Greccio, Italy. ____________________________________________________ Bonehead Award: Florida man shot ex-girlfriend 15 times for not answering texts _____________________________________________________ Q If you believe the doctors, nothing is wholesome; if you believe the theologians, nothing is innocent; if you believe the military, nothing is safe. --- Lord Salisbury Language is the source of misunderstandings. --- Antoine de Saint-Exupery (1900 - 1944) In all large corporations, there is a pervasive fear that someone, somewhere is having fun with a computer on company time. Networks help alleviate that fear. --- John C. Dvorak ____________________________________________________ Why do Jewish men so often become doctors? Because a doctor can order a woman to undress without guilt, he can look at her without fear of being interrupted, and on best of all, it's usually her husband that pays for it all. __________________________________________________ German scientists dug 50 meters underground and discovered small pieces of copper. After studying these pieces for a long time, Germany announced that the ancient Germans 25,000 years ago had a nation-wide telephone network. Naturally, the British government was not that easily impressed. They ordered their own scientists to dig too. 100 meters down, they found small pieces of glass and they soon announced that the ancient Brits 35,000 years ago already had a nationwide fiber network. Scottish scientists were outraged. They dug 200 meters underground, but found absolutely nothing. So they concluded that the ancient Scotts 55,000 years ago had cellular telephones under their kilts.. __________________________________________________ An International Bonehead Award has been earned by Carlos Lemont Jones, 23, Melbourne, Florida USA Florida man shot ex-girlfriend 15 times for not answering texts A Brevard County man accused of killing his ex-girlfriend reportedly shot her fifteen times because she wouldn't return his calls or text messages, according to an arrest affidavit. Carlos Lemont Jones, 23, was arrested this week in connection to the murder of 23-year-old Sha'Dayla A. Johnson. Melbourne police said the shooting happened on Colbert Circle near East University Boulevard on Tuesday morning. According to the affidavit, Sha'Dayla was leaving for work when she was shot fifteen times in the back outside her home. Her father, Torrance Clark, told deputies he heard gunshots and saw Jones staring toward the home. When he walked outside, he said Jones was gone and he found his daughter face down on the carport floor. Sha'Dayla and Jones had reportedly been living together until they broke up two weeks prior during an argument. Torrance said Jones had been "continuously calling and harassing Sha'Dayla in efforts to get back with her." The report stated that Sha'Dayla ignored his calls and texts. Jones' mother reportedly convinced him to turn himself in and police said he gave a full confession to shooting his ex-girlfriend because he was angry that she would not return his calls or text messages. The affidavit stated that Jones bought the gun he allegedly used to kill Sha'Dayla a week prior to the shooting. When asked if he was remorseful, Jones reportedly told police "no" and said if he had to do it again, he would have killed Sha'Dayla and her father. ___________________________________________________ ___________________________________________________ Was it J.Edgar Hoover who once said: "Legalize crime, then tax them out of business!" ? The government of England seems to have been inspired by that and is taxing itself out of the taxing business. They have raised the tax on cigarettes so high that officially admitted over 1/3 (-but actually over 60%-) of the cigarettes smoked in the UK are smuggled and tax free cigarettes. Officially smoking has increased 6.5% in the last year. Since they probably didn't check with all the smugglers, that figure is probably closer to 10%. Since smoking is the leading cause of statistics, the unemployment rate is expected to drop accordingly, as more people find jobs in compiling statistics. ___________________________________________________ If you can spare a coin, PLEASE hit PayPal with it! ___________________________________________________ Desert Rose Andrew Htut _______________________________________________ During a phone conversation, my niece mentioned that she was taking a psychology course at university. "Oh, great," I said, "Now you'll be analyzing everyone in the family." "No, no," she replied. "I don't take abnormal psychology until next year." _______________________________________________ The other night I was waiting for a woman getting ready to go to Walmart. She sat there and put on eyebrow pencil, eye shadow, eyeliner, eyelashes, mascara, toner, blush and lipstick and all kinds of stuff I don't even know the names of, then turned to me and asked, "Does this look natural?" __________________________________________________ If you can spare a coin, PLEASE hit PayPal with it! ___________________________________________________ One evening as a family was eating dinner, the mother knowing that her young son Johnnie had been telling lot's of lies as of late, announced that she had made arrangements for her son to go over to talk to their priest. The priest had a good reputation for helping people who were compulsive liars. The mother asks her son if he would go over to the parsonage to see the priest. So Johnnie being a very helpful kid went over. At answering the door the priest ask Johnnie if he was at church Sunday, of course he lied and said yes. "Well," said the priest, "I guess you seen what happened at church on Sunday?" "Yes" said Johnnie lying. "Well I guess you saw that big grizzly bear come through the front door and up the aisle grabbing people from their seats and eating them alive?" "Yeah" said Johnnie. "Well I guess you saw that little dog come in right behind him, and stare down that grizzly right in the middle of the church?" "Yeah" said Johnnie, lying again. After a few moments of silence the priest finally looked Johnnie straight in the eye and ask Johnnie if he honest to God believed that story. Johnnie replied, without a quiver, "I sure do preacher, that was my Dog!" ___________________________________________________________ DearWebby's Tech Support Pits From:Delta Re: Double sided printing Dear Webby I need a new printer. Like you, I got fed up with ink squirters a long time ago. I got 15 years and an awful lot of printing out of my Dell color laser. Now, though, Dell does not make them anymore. Now what? Delta Dear Delta, Actually, I don't think DELL ever made printers in their garage or basement. They just marketed them, after a DELL sticker was put on the outside, at the far away factory. They stopped doing that, and now they market Lexmark printers. Lexmark took over the IBM printer department. At first many people were quite hesitant to buy Asian made IBM/Lexmark printers, but they turned out quite OK and are still in business. When my DELL color laser died of old age a couple of years ago, I bought a Lexmark C2400. The first surprise was that it was extremely heavy. They must have replaced all plastic with cast iron or used Uranium. The second surprise was printing letters, that were more than one page. The page came out part way, then it sucked it back in and did more printing type noises. Finally it spit out the page, and the second page had been printed on the back of the first page. Neato! Takes a bit of getting used to, but you can tell it in the settings not to do that, if you have to print 200 pages, and just want to flip the stack over before you go for lunch. Aside from that peculiarity and the getting used to the printing on the back side, I can definitely recommend that printer. Have FUN DearWebby _____________________________________________________ A fellow decided to decorate his bedroom. He wasn't sure how many rolls of wallpaper he would need but he knew that the irishman who lived next door had recently done the same job and the two rooms were identical in size. "Murphy," he asked, "how many rolls of wallpaper did you buy for your bedroom?" "Twenty" said murphy. So the fellow bought the twenty rolls of paper and did the job. It looked wonderful, but he had 12 rolls of wallpaper left over. "Murphy," he said. "I bought twenty rolls of wallpaper for the bedroom, but i've got 12 left over!" "Dat's funny," said murphy. "So did i." ____________________________________________________ Today, December 25 in 0800, Charlemagne was crowned first Holy Roman Emperor in Rome by Pope Leo III. 1066, William the Conqueror was crowned king of England. 1223, St. Francis of Assisi assembled one of the first Nativity scenes, in Greccio, Italy. 1776, Gen. George Washington and his troops crossed the Delaware River for a surprise attack against Hessian forces at Trenton, NJ. 1818, "Silent Night" was performed for the first time, at the Church of St. Nikolaus in Oberndorff, Austria. 1868, U.S. President Andrew Johnson granted an unconditional pardon to all persons involved in the Southern rebellion that resulted in the Civil War. 1896, John Philip Sousa finally titled the melody "The Stars and Stripes Forever." 1914, During World War I, British and German troops observed an unofficial truce and even playing Soccer together on the Western Front. 1917, The play "Why Marry?" opened at the Astor Theatre in New York City. "Why Marry?" was the first dramatic play to win a Pulitzer Prize. 1926, Hirohito became the emperor of Japan after the death of his father Emperor Taisho. 1930, The Mt. Van Hoevenberg bobsled run at Lake Placid, New York opened to the public. It was the first bobsled track of international specifications to open in the U.S. 1931, Lawrence Tibbett was the featured vocalist as radio came to the Metropolitan Opera House in New York City. The first opera was "Hansel und Gretel" and was heard on the NBC network of stations. 1937, Arturo Toscanini conducted the first broadcast of "Symphony of the Air" over NBC radio. 1939, "A Christmas Carol," by Charles Dickens, was read on CBS radio for the first time. 1941, Hong Kong surrendered to the Japanese. 1946, W.C. Fields died at the age of 66. 1962, The Department of Commerce Census Clock in Washington, DC, recorded the U.S. population on this day as 188,000,000. 1972, The Nicaraguan capital Managua was hit by an earthquake. Over 10,000 people were killed. 1979, The USSR invaded Afghanistan in a bid to halt civil war and protect USSR interests. 1989, Ousted Romanian President Nicolae Ceausescu and his wife, Elena, were executed following a popular uprising. 1989, Dissident playwright Vaclav Havel was elected president of Czechoslovakia. 1991, Soviet President Mikhail S. Gorbachev went on television to announce his resignation as leader of a Communist superpower that had already gone out of existence. 1998, Seven days into their journey, Richard Branson, Steve Fossett and Per Lindstrand of Sweden gave up their attempt to make the first nonstop round-the-world balloon flight. They ditched near Hawaii. 2000, Over 300 people were killed and dozens were injured by fire at a Christmas party in the Chinese city of Luoyang. The incident occurred at the Dongdu Disco. 2022 Do smiled.
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