Dear Webby's Humor Letter
widely read, forwarded, copied and imitated daily since 1994
Again voted Best Newsletter
Dear Webby's Humor Letter, daily since 1994
Clean humor and tech tips, updated daily! The Dear Webby Humor Letter is still the best Humor Newsletter and is available in regular HTML and large font HTML for vision impaired readers. The Dear Webby Humor newsletter is sent from a server that has a Listed Sender ID, proper SPF record, and matching forward and reverse DNS. It has an approved privacy policy and full contact information. The Dear Webby Humor Letter is strictly Double Opt-In and is not on any blacklist. No advertising mails are sent from this address or IP number. If you are not receiving your subscription, click here.
Return to Webby homepage Hosting | Software | Contacts | Privacy Policy | About You have a friend @Webby!
High traffic web space on reliable UNIX and Linux servers with the fastest connectivity.
Regular HTML version    Click here for Large Print  Subscribe   |   Unsubscribe |  To write to me: DearWebby@webby.com
 
 
 Good Morning, Do, Today is Monday, September 11 Remember 9/11 ! Have Fun! Dearwebby Todays Bonehead Award: Day care workers stop creep from running off with 2 tots. Cops tenderize and arrest him.  Bonehead ______________________________________________________ Today, Sept 11 in 1609 Explorer Henry Hudson sailed into New York harbor and discovered Manhattan Island and the Hudson River. See More of what happened on this day in history. ______________________________________________________ 
If you can help with the cost of the Humor Letter, please donate what you can!
______________________________________________________ The best time to plant an oak tree was twenty-five years ago. The second best time is today. --- James Carville When you are young, you want to be the master of your fate and the captain of your soul. When you are older, you dream of being the master of your weight and the captain of your bowling team. --- Socratex ______________________________________________________ If you like the Humor Letter, please vote! ______________________________________________________ From deep inside the automobile there came a dreadful curse, A man was trying to fold the map, The way is was at first. _____________________________________________________ Malwarebytes for Home | Anti-Malware Premium | Free Trial Download ______________________________________________________ Thanks to Ellen for this one: One of my picture frames was broken, and I decided to try my hand at repairing it. A screw was missing in one corner, so I called the hardware store. "Do you carry screws for picture frames?" I asked. "What size do you need?" "I don't know, but it's rather small." The man sighed. "Ma'am, we have 'itsy-bitsy' size screws for a dollar and 49 cents in a package of 10, and we have 'teeny-weeny' size screws , also for a dollar and 49 cents in a package of 10. I can give you a special deal and sell you both packages for two dollars and fifty cents.'" ______________________________________________________ Note the female captain! _____________________________________________________
If you like the Humor Letter, please vote! Thanks for your votes!
______________________________________________________ An INTERNATIONAL BONEHEAD AWARD has been earned by Calvin Davis, 47, Newark, Delaware Day care workers stop creep from running off with 2 tots. Cops tenderize and arrest him. Day care workers in Delaware stopped a man from walking off with two babies after the stranger shoved his way into the facility and grabbed the infants, state police said Friday. The man rang the front doorbell at Happy Kids Academy in Newark and pushed a worker to get into the facility, police spokesman Sgt. Richard Bratz said. The man went to the infant room, punched another worker in the face, and picked up two infants, putting one under each arm. When the man tried to leave with the babies, one of the workers stood in front of the door to stop him, police said. The other worker went behind the man and grabbed one baby. The first worker then caught the second baby as the child began slipping from the suspect's arm. The suspect ran from the day care, punching a car in the parking lot, Bratz said. State and county police officers saw the man and ordered him to stop walking and show his hands, police said. The man refused to obey the officers' orders, Bratz said, and one officer shot him with a Taser. The man continued to approach the officer, police said, and the officer tripped on a curb and fell backward. The officer again deployed the Taser, authorities said, but the man continued to approach the officer. The officer then hit Davis for a while with a baton, and was able to eventually take him into custody, Bratz said. Calvin Davis, 47, of Newark was taken to a hospital for evaluation. When he is released, Bratz said, Davis will be charged with kidnapping, assault and various other offenses. The mug shot seems to be from previous arrests. The injured officer was taken to a hospital. One of the two babies sustained a minor cut. _________________________________ Tech Support Pits From: Chris Re: Mailing photoshop pictures Dear Webby, Good morning and I hope this finds you and yours well. My husband sent me a group of pictures from his laptop at work. It's in Adobe Photoshop files and I can't open the attachment. I get the box with the red X that says it was unable to open the program because 'qt-mt.dll' wasn't found and that I should reinstall it. I'm clueless at this point, can you tell me what that program is and how/where I go to install it. I have downloaded the photoshop, but still it isn't working. Thanks for the jokes, pictures, and teck help. Have a great and safe weekend! Chris Dear Chris Ask hubby to save the files as JPG and then send them again. Have FUN! DearWebby

>From James Le Petit Chef
If you can help with the cost of the Humor Letter, please donate what you can!
Daily tip from Thriftyfun.com Pickle Popsicles By SHARON [16 Posts, 34 Comments] These popsicles are made from pickle juice. My grandkids love them. Pour the pickle juice in Popsicle molds, and freeze. The kids love them, and even my pregnant niece loves them. Source: They sell them at my grandson's T-ball games. By branbrumom from Vian, OK ____________________________________________________
Puppet sings to Simon - You Make Me Feel Like a Natural Woman, starts at 1:25
____________________________________________________ From Obie Dear Webby I really enjoy your Daily Humor Letter, all the good jokes, without having so many four letter words to make a point. The Tech Support, Bonehead Awards are real nice too. I also enjoy the BONUS links a lot. You are doing GREAT. Thanks, Obie ___________________________________________________
You Never Know What You'll Find!
___________________________________________________ A very young couple had just gotten married and decided to spend their honeymoon in a large Manhattan hotel. Showing signs of nervousness the young man approached the check-in desk. "Good evening, sir," said the official behind the desk, favoring the young man with a perceptive wink. "Suite 16?" "Oh, no!" the young man responded quickly. "She's eighteen."
Ophelia Dingbatter's NewsNo sermon and not suitable for church, just jokes and fun for grownups. Read it on-line or subscribe. If you subscribe, look for the double opt-in confirmation request.
____________________________________________________ From the Classified Ads: Auto Repair Service. Free pick-up and delivery. Try us once, you'll never go anywhere again. Our experienced Mom will care for your child. Fenced yard, meals, and smacks included. Dog for sale: eats anything and is fond of children. Stock up and save. Limit: one. Semi-Annual after-Christmas Sale. 3-year old teacher needed for pre-school. Experience preferred. Mixing bowl set designed to please a cook with round bottom for efficient beating. Dinner Special -- Turkey $2.35; Chicken or Beef $2.25; Children $2.00 ____________________________________________________
 Today, Sept 11, in 1297 Scotsman William Wallace defeated the English forces of Sir Hugh de Cressingham at the Battle of Stirling Bridge. 1499 French forces took over Milan, Italy. 1609 Explorer Henry Hudson sailed into New York harbor and discovered Manhattan Island and the Hudson River. 1695 Imperial troops under Eugene of Savoy defeated the Turks at the Battle of Zenta. 1709 An Anglo-Dutch-Austrian force defeated the French in the Battle of Malplaquet. 1714 Spanish and French troops broke into Barcelona and ended Catalonia's sovereignty after 13 months of seige. 1776 A Peace Conference was held between British General Howe and three representatives of the Continental Congress (Benjamin Franklin, John Adams and Edward Rutledge). The conference failed and the American war for independence continued for seven years. 1777 American forces, under General George Washington, were forced to retreat at the Battle of Brandywine Creek by British forces under William Howe. The Stars and Stripes (American flag) were carried for the first time in the battle. 1814 The U.S. fleet defeated a squadron of British ships in the Battle of Lake Champlain, VT. 1842 1,400 Mexican troops captured San Antonio, TX. The Mexicans retreated with prisoners. 1855 The siege of Sevastopol ended when French, British and Piedmontese troops captured the main naval base of the Russian Black fleet in the Crimean War. 1875 "Professor Tidwissel's Burglar Alarm" was featured in the New York Daily Graphic and became the first comic strip to appear in a newspaper. 1877 The first comic-character timepiece was patented by the Waterbury Clock Company. 1883 The mail chute was patented by James Cutler. The new device was first used in the Elwood Building in Rochester, NY. 1897 A ten-week strike of coal workers in Pennsylvania, WV, and Ohio came to an end. The workers won an eight-hour workday, semi-monthly pay, and company stores were abolished. 1910 In Hollywood, the first commercially successful electric bus line opened. 1936 Boulder Dam in Nevada was dedicated by U.S. President Franklin D. Roosevelt by turning on the dam's first hydroelectric generator. The dam is now called Hoover Dam. 1941 U.S. President Franklin D. Roosevelt gave orders to attack any German or Italian vessels found in U.S. defensive waters. The U.S. had not officially entered World War II at this time. 1941 In Arlington, VA, the groundbreaking ceremony for the Pentagon took place. 1952 Dr. Charles Hufnagel successfully replaced a diseased aorta valve with an artificial valve made of plastic. 1959 The U.S. Congress passed a bill authorizing the creation of food stamps. 1965 The 1st Cavalry Division (Airmobile) arrived in South Vietnam and was stationed at An Khe. 1974 "Little House On The Prairie" made its television debut. 1977 The Atari 2600 was released. It was originally sold as the Atari VCS. The system was discontinued on January 1, 1992. 1985 A U.S. satellite passed through the tail of the Giacobini-Zinner comet. It was the first on-the-spot sampling of a comet. 1990 U.S. President Bush vowed "Saddam Hussein will fail" while addressing Congress on the Persian Gulf crisis. In the speech Bush spoke of an objective of a new world order "freer from the threat of terror, stronger in the pursuit of justice, and more secure in the quest for peace". 1991 Soviet President Mikhail Gorbachev announced that thousands of troops would be drawn out of Cuba. 1997 Scotland voted to create its own Parliament after 290 years of union with England. 2001 In the U.S., four airliners were hijacked and were intentionally crashed. Two airliners hit the World Trade Center, which collapsed shortly after, in New York City, NY. One airliner hit the Pentagon in Arlington, VA. Another airliner crashed into a field in Pennsylvania. About 3,000 people were killed. 2012 Terrorists attacked the U.S. consulate in Benghazi, Libya. Five Americans were killed and ten others were injured. 2017 Do smiled.

If you can help with the cost of the
Humor Letter, please donate what you can!

Go to TOP
Well, Do , that's all for today.

Have FUN !
Dear Webby from Webby.com

Please give a friend a subscription to the Humor Letter

If you like the Dear Webby Daily Humor Letter,
please vote for it at the Ezine Finder:
Thanks for your votes!


The Archive is in the Dear Webby Humor Letter Blog.ARCHIVE: If you missed previous issues, you can see them
in the Humor Letter Blog at http://webby.com/humor/blog

If the greeting on top does NOT have your first name,
or at least your favorite nickname, please tell me.
I can correct that in two seconds and greet you properly
from then on.

If you want to give a gift subscription to a friend, but don't
have time to subscribe her or him, just hit REPLY and tell me.
I will gladly enter them for you and send them a confirmation request.

To reply to me personally, just hit REPLY or write to humor@webby.com

If you do not normally get the Humor Letter every day, and this was the first time,
then a friend sent you a one time sample or maybe even gave you a gift subscription.
If you like the Humor Letter, then you can subscribe at http://webby.com/sub.html
You can also UNsubscribe there.

If you don't want to receive the Webby Humor Letter,
please unsubscribe by clicking the link below:
You are currently subscribed to the Regular HTML version with this address:
newsletter@newslettercollector.com
UNSUBSCRIBE from the regular HTMLversion

. Zoom the font size for best readability
Search the web for:
  Recommended Resources  
Malwarebytes for Home | Anti-Malware Premium | Free Trial Download
Find a human
Bypass voice menus



Web Tools

handy program downloads


SPAM CONTROL made Easy!
Click here for a FREE
30 day trial

This is the Mail Washer that I use and have
used for over 10 years. I have tested many
others, but Mail Washer is still
The Best
spam control

Crap Cleaner Safely get rid of
tons of useless crap left over from
old, obsolete updates, temp files, lost
file fragments, etc.
STILL FREE


Babelfish Translator
Converter
Urban Legends
Truth or Hoax?
Check before believing chain letters


Great tool for getting rid of
spy-ware and mal-ware. Still FREE

Virus Hoaxes

Virus / Trojan / Malware Info
Straight from McAfee Threat Center

   FREE HTML Course !   


Get the REAL McAfee
at incredible discount!


used and
Highly recommended
by Dear Webby



This Undeleter will easily and securely recover deleted files from hard drives, flash drives, USB external drives, Zip drives, Firewire drives, digital camera cards, and more. This powerful recovery software can recover deleted files from most data loss scenarios.
Is your data worth recovery?

SmartFix The ONLY Registry Fixer, that I recommend!

All In One PX Fixer has all the necessary tools included: Fix System Errors, Improve Startup, Clean Registry, Defrag Disk, Optimize System Settings, Back-Up, etc. Currently Smart OC Fixer is 50% off regular price!


Roboform, still the best password manager.
Still FREE
  Highly recommended by DearWebby
FREE, no fuss download!

Domain Name registration:
Discuss your needs first, don't just register a name, that might not be good for you! Ask DearWebby first. That will save you a lot of money!


Software for your own postcard site
 YOUR OWN
Postcard Site
!
You too can easily have a postcard site for business or fun.


If you like the Dear Webby Daily Humor Letter, please vote for it at the Cumuli Ezine Finder:

Etiquette To Get Read
Ebook with power tips
for effective writing,
by DearWebby


Click here to order YOUR ad to be shown here

Ads are $50 per month for subscribers only.
$60 per month for anybody else.


Find newsletters



Dear Bubba
All is forgiven. I still love you. Please come back!
Ps. Congratulations on your lottery win!
Your Betty-Sue



That could be YOUR ad for $50 per week.
Subscribers only!
Click here to order YOUR ad to be shown here

Nudist Colony of Alberta
Closed for the season

Space Weather
Solar storms, Auroras

Thesaurus

NASA Multimedia Gallery
Sky Map: the interactive planetarium of the Web

Sky Watch: Calendar of celestial events

Weather Underground
Maps and Satellite


Click a meal
to a homeless vet!


HungerSite
A free click donates a cup of food to a hungry person.


The number of mammograms donated thanks to clicks has dropped quite noticeably when these two ladies went away. So here they are back, working hard to get you to click. Donate by clicking on them!

BreastCancer Site

A free click helps to donate mammograms to women who can not afford one.


Feed the Animals!
Animal Rescue

Do, Please Feed Dear Webby!

Affordable web space
effective privacy policy Privacy Policy

Unique visitors since 1/1/11
free counters



Have FUN
Dear Webby
CEO of Webby, Inc
DearWebby @ webby.com
Box 646
Black Diamond, AB T0L 0H0
Canada


Subscribe    |   Give a Gift Subscription    |   Unsubscribe
Click here for Large Print
Go to TOP
You can un-subscribe from this list by clicking this link: http://webby.com/magiclist/index.cgi?act=u&l=humor2&email=newsletter@newslettercollector.com