Good Morning, Do! Today is Monday, May 10 ___________________________________________________ If you can spare a coin, PLEASE hit PayPal with it! ___________________________________________________ Man charged with murder of 7-year-old at McDonalds drive-thru has 2 pending felony cases ___________________________________________________ Today, May 10 in 1960 The U.S.S. Triton completed the first circumnavigation of the globe under water. The trip started on February 16. ____________________________________________________ There is no such thing as an underestimate of average intelligence. --- Henry Adams (1838 - 1918) ____________________________________________________ Q. What do you get when you cross a lion and an ocelot? A. A political animal called a Lialot, close relative of the Cheetalot. ____________________________________________________ Two senior gentlemen are working at a sewage treatment plant. One guy goes off to lunch and comes back to find his buddy standing above a vat of sewage with a long rake. "What are you doing?!" he yells "My coat fell in!" his buddy yells back "You're not really gonna wear that again are you?!" his friend said worriedly. "No, no. Gosh no!" Says the old man to the relief of his friend. "I have to get it back though. My teeth are in the pocket!" ____________________________________________________ Waterton Lake park, a bit south of here ____________________________________________________ Joan, the town gossip and supervisor of the town's morals, recently accused George, a local man, of being an alcoholic because she saw his pickup truck parked outside the town's only bar. George stared at her for a moment, and said nothing. Later that evening, he and his plumbing apprentice parked their pickup trucks in front of her house and left them there all night. ____________________________________________________ An INTERNATIONAL BONEHEAD AWARD has been earned by Marion Lewis, 18 Chicago, Illinois, USA Man charged with murder of 7-year-old at McDonalds drive-thru has 2 pending felony cases Prosecutors on Sunday charged a suburban man in connection with the fatal shooting of 7-year-old Jaslyn Adams at a West Side McDonalds drive-thru restaurant and trying to carjack a family from Las Vegas on the Eisenhower Expressway. Marion Lewis had two felony juvenile cases pending one for burglary and looting, the other for possessing a stolen motor vehicle when he participated in the murder and other crimes this month, prosecutors said. Hes the 18th person charged with killing, trying to kill, or shooting someone in Chicago this year while awaiting trial in other felony cases. Assistant States Attorney Kevin Deboni said Adams was sitting in the front seat of her dads car when he pulled up to the McDonalds menu board on April 18. At the same time, Lewis drove a silver Audi into the lot and pulled up behind their car, according to Deboni. Two gunmen stepped out of the Audis passenger-side doors and opened fire on the fathers car. One was armed with a 40- caliber pistol, and the other wielded an AK47-style rifle. The men then returned to the Audi and left the area. Police found 45 shell casings at the scene. Lewis never got out of the car, Deboni said. Chicago cops pulled Adams from her dads car and drove her to Stroger Hospital in a squad car, Deboni said. An officer administered CPR as they sped toward the hospital, but the girl was pronounced dead from three gunshot wounds, he said. Her father suffered a gunshot wound to the torso and survived. About two hours before the shooting, Lewis posted a video to social media that showed him driving an Audi while wearing a red New York Yankees baseball hat and a black coat, Deboni said. Two passengers in the car are allegedly seen in the video wearing the same clothes that the gunmen wore at McDonalds. And the social media footage shows the back seat passenger holding an AK47-style rifle, according to Deboni. Chicago police found Lewis social media post and quickly identified him and the passengers from previous contact officers have had with the men, Deboni said. On Thursday, police tracked Lewis to an apartment in Lombard via his Facebook use, Deboni continued. Undercover cops staked out the complex and allegedly saw the distinctive Audi sitting in the parking lot. Cops watched as Lewis emerged from the apartment with a tan backpack and got into a stolen Dodge Durango, Deboni said. Officers tried to box him in, but Lewis repeatedly rammed a parked car until he was able to drive away, according to prosecutors. Police followed the Durango until it crashed on the Eisenhower Expressway near Mannheim Road. Lewis got out of the wrecked SUV and ran into the interstates traffic lanes with his backpack, Deboni said. According to the allegations, Lewis, brandishing a handgun, began pulling on the drivers door of a Land Rover that was carrying five occupants, including young children in safety seats. Lewis allegedly fired a bullet through the drivers side window and pulled the driver out while the rest of the family remained inside. The driver was cut by flying glass, but the bullet did not hit anyone, Deboni continued. An undercover officer who was searching the wrecked Durango heard the gunshot and saw Lewis pull the driver from the car, Deboni said. The cop pulled his gun and moved to the Land Rover, where he allegedly saw the top of a handgun sticking out from under Lewis thigh on the drivers seat. Lewis refused to show his hands and made repeated motions toward the gun, Deboni said. The officer fired five rounds at Lewis when the SUV began rolling backward toward him, according to Deboni. One bullet struck Lewis in his shoulder. Deboni said the officer then reached into the car, retrieved Lewis gun, and took the 18-year-old into custody. An AK47- style rifle was allegedly found in Lewis backpack. Lab tests linked the rifle and the 40-caliber handgun Lewis was carrying to the McDonalds shooting, Deboni alleged. Prosecutors on Sunday charged him with 18 felonies, including first-degree murder, three counts of attempted first-degree murder, aggravated vehicular hijacking by discharge of a firearm, and six felony counts of aggravated discharge of a firearm. He was previously convicted in juvenile court of a gun charge, possessing a stolen motor vehicle, criminal trespass to vehicle, burglary to auto, and attempted residential burglary as a juvenile, authorities said. Saying Lewis turned the 290 expressway into a crime scene, Judge David Navarro ordered him held without bail. The two gunmen have not yet been charged. Ironically, Lewis earlier this year posted a screenshot of a Sun-Times news story about a double homicide to his Facebook page. The three-paragraph passage notes that police found cellphone video of the two accused murderers riding in a car with the murder weapons before the slayings and said detectives located the suspects by using Facebook records. DearWebby's Tech Support Pits FROM: Karen RE: Fake virus alert Dear Webby Got this:... A new virus has just been discovered that has been classified by Microsoft and by McAfee .... ...... Karen==== Dear Karen Hoaxes like that are called "Moron-Bait". It's from some joker trying to see how many gullibles fall for a silly hoax and possibly a trap. Since Microsoft does not classify viruses, and never has, whenever you see anything claiming that Microsoft, IBM, Google or AOL had announced or classified a virus, then it is instantly obvious that it is just Moron-Bait. Whoever sent that Moron-Bait to you, was just tricking you into looking silly. Just dump it. Have FUN! DearWebby A woman goes to the supermarket. She starts walking up and down the aisles. Each aisle she goes to she touches her head, her ears, her breasts, and her crotch. After doing this a number of times a man approaches her and ask if she is having a problem. She tells him no. He says that he would like to know what she is doing at the beginning of each aisle. She says she is trying to remember her grocery list. He seems puzzles and asks for an explanation, so she goes thru the motions again. She touches her head and says, "Head of lettuce." Ears. "Two ears of corn." Breasts. "Two chicken breasts." Crotch: "Fantastic." | If you can help with the cost of the Humor Letter, please donate what you can! | If you like my work,
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_____________________________________________ My cousin, Marilyn, the teacher, required each of her students to bring in a permission slip signed by one of their parents or a guardian, to take an advanced and graphic, junior high school, sex education class. One of her students, a well built lad on the football team, handed in his slip and explained to Marilyn, "My mom says I can take the course as long as there's no homework." ___________________________________________ An old Jewish man reads about Einstein's theory of relativity in the newspaper and asks his university educated grandson to explain it to him. "Well, grandpa , it's sort of like this. Einstein says that if you're having your teeth drilled without Novocain, a minute seems like an hour. But if you're sitting with a beautiful woman on your lap, an hour seems like a minute." The old man considers this profound bit of mathematical thinking for a moment and says, .... ...."And from this Einstein made a living?" ____________________________________________ The minister was preoccupied with thoughts of how he was going to, after the worship service, ask the congregation to come up with more money than they were expecting for repairs to the church building. Therefore, he was annoyed to find that the regular organist was sick and a substitute had been brought in at the last minute. The substitute wanted to know what to play. "Here's a copy of the service," he said impatiently. "But you'll have to think of something to play after I make the announcement about the finances." During the service, the minister paused and said, "Brothers and Sisters, we are in great difficulty; the roof repairs cost twice as much as we expected, and we need $4,000 more. Any of you who can pledge $100 or more, please stand up." At that moment, the substitute organist played "The Star-Spangled Banner." And that is how the substitute became the regular organist! ___________________________________________________ | Ophelia Dingbatter's NewsNo sermon and not suitable for church, just jokes and fun for grownups. Read it on-line or subscribe. If you subscribe, look for the double opt-in confirmation request. |
___________________________________________________ | Today, May 10 in 1503 Christopher Columbus discovered the Cayman Islands. 1676 In Virginia, Bacon's Rebellion began. Nathaniel Bacon led the the rebellion which pitted frontiersmen against the government. 1768 The imprisonment of the journalist John Wilkes as an outlaw provoked violence in London. Wilkes was returned to parliament as a member for Middlesex. 1773 The English Parliament passed the Tea Act, which taxed all tea in the U.S. colonies. 1774 Louis XVI ascended the throne of France. 1775 Ethan Allen and Colonel Benedict Arnold led an attack on the British Fort Ticonderoga and captured it from the British. 1796 Napoleon Bonaparte won a brilliant victory against the Austrians at Lodi bridge in Italy. 1840 Mormon leader Joseph Smith moved his band of followers to Illinois to escape the hostilities they had experienced in Missouri. 1857 The Seepoys of India revolted against the British Army. 1865 Confederate President Jefferson Davis was captured by Union troops near Irvinville, GA. 1869 Central Pacific and Union Pacific Rail Roads meet in Promontory, UT. A golden spike was driven in at the celebration of the first transcontinental railroad in the U.S. 1876 Richard Wagners "Centennial Inaugural March" was heard for the first time at the Centennial Exposition in Philadelphia, PA. 1898 A vending machine law was enacted in Omaha, NE. It cost $5,000 for a permit. 1908 The first Mother's Day observance took place during a church service in Grafton, West Virginia. 1924 J. Edgar Hoover was appointed head of the Federal Bureau of Investigation. 1927 The Hotel Statler in Boston, MA. became the first hotel to install radio headsets in each of its 1,300 rooms. 1930 The Adler Planetarium opened to the public in Chicago, IL. 1933 The Nazis staged massive public book burnings in Germany. 1940 Germany invaded Belgium, France, the Netherlands, and Luxembourg. 1941 England's House of Commons was destroyed by a German air raid. 1941 Rudolf Hess, Adolf Hitler's deputy, parachuted into Scotland on what he claimed was a peace mission. He got jailed for life. 1942 U.S. forces in the Philippines began to surrender to the Japanese. 1943 U.S. troops invaded Attu in the Aleutian Islands to expel the Japanese. 1960 The U.S.S. Triton completed the first circumnavigation of the globe under water. The trip started on February 16. 1962 Marvel Comics published the first issue of "The Incredible Hulk." 1968 Preliminary Vietnam peace talks began in Paris. 1978 Britain's Princess Margaret and the Earl of Snowdon announced they were divorcing after 18 years of marriage. 1986 Navy Lt. Commander Donnie Cochran became the first black pilot to fly with the Blue Angels team. 1994 Nelson Mandela was sworn in as South Africas first black president. 1997 An earthquake in northeastern Iran killed at least 2,400 people. 1999 China broke off talks on human rights with the U.S. in response to NATO's accidental bombing of the Chinese Embassy in Yugoslavia. 1999 The Cezanne painting "Still Life With Curtain, Pitcher and Bowl of Fruit" sold for 60.5 million. 2000 11,000 residents were evacuated in Los Alamos, NM, due to a fire that was blown into a canyon. The fire had been deliberately set to clear brush. 2001 Boeing Co. announced that it would be moving its headquarters to Chicago, IL. 2001 In Ghana, 121 people were killed in a stampede at a soccer game. 2002 Robert Hanssen was sentenced to life in prison with no chance for parole. Hanssen, an FBI agent, had sold U.S. secrets to Moscow for $1.4 million in cash and diamonds. 2002 Taiwan test fired a locally made Sky Bow II surface-to-air missile for the first time. They also fired three U.S.-made Hawk missiles. 2002 Dr. Pepper announced that it would be introducing a new flavor, Red Fusion, for the first time in 117 years. 2011 It was announced that Microsoft had closed a deal to purchase the internet phone service Skype for $8.5 billion. 2013 In New York, NY, crane operators hoisted the final pieces of the spire atop One World Trade Center (formerly called the Freedom Tower). 2016 NASA announced that it's Kepler mission had verified 1,284 new planets. This was the single largest finding of planets to date. 2017 Apple's stock market value exceeded the $500 billion mark. 2021 Do smiled. |
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