--- Good Morning, Do! Today is Friday, July 6 Time to wear a bit of red to show your support for the troops! Have FUN! Dearwebby Todays Bonehead Award: When his waitress told him he was too drunk for another drink, he got violent. Bonehead ______________________________________________________ Today, July 6 in 1923 The Union of Soviet Socialist Republics was established. More of today in history at HIstory ______________________________________________________ | If you can help with the cost of the Humor Letter, please donate what you can! | |
If nobody spoke unless he had something to say, the human race would very soon lose the use of speech. --- W. Somerset Maugham (1874 - 1965) People with courage and character always seem sinister to the rest. --- Hermann Hesse ____________________________________________________ If you like the Humor Letter, please vote! ______________________________________________________ You Know You're Living in 2018 When... 1. You accidentally enter your password on the microwave. 2. You haven't played solitaire with real cards in years. 3. You have a list of 15 phone numbers to reach your family of 3. 4. You e-mail the person who works at the desk next to you. 5. Your reason for not staying in touch with friends and family is that they don't answer their e-mail. 6. You pull up in your own driveway and use your cell phone to see if anyone is home to help you carry in the groceries. 7. Every commercial on television has a web site at the bottom of the screen. 8. Leaving the house without your cell phone, which you didn't have the first 20 or 30 (or 60) years of your life, is now a cause for panic and you turn around to go and get it. 10. You get up in the morning and go on line before getting your coffee. 11. You start tilting your head sideways to smile. : ) 12. You're reading this and nodding and laughing. 13. Even worse, you know exactly to whom you are going to forward this message. 14. You are too busy to notice there was no #9 on this list. 15. You actually scrolled back up to check that there wasn't a #9 on this list. _____________________________________________________ ______________________________________________________ _____________________________________________________ If you like the Humor Letter, please vote! Thanks for your votes! _____________________________________________________ Classic! Just as John got in the door, after staying at the bar a bit too long, the cuckoo clock in the hall started up and cuckooed 3 times. He realized his wife would probably wake up, so he cuckooed another 9 times. He was really proud of himself, having a quick witty solution, even when smashed, to escape a possible conflict. Next morning the wife asked him what time he got in and he told her 12 o'clock. She didn't seem disturbed at all. Whew! Got away with that one! She then told him that they needed a new cuckoo clock. When he asked her why, she said "Well, it cuckooed 3 times, said 'Oh, f@#%,' cuckooed 4 more times, cleared its throat, cuckooed another 3 times, snickered, and finally cuckooed twice more, and then it farted." ___________________________________________________ An INTERNATIONAL BONEHEAD AWARD has been earned by William Banks, 49, Spartanburg, South Carolina When his waitress told him he was too drunk for another drink, he got violent. A Wild Wing Cafe waitress made the call to stop serving drinks to a customer who was too intoxicated, and when the man was cut off, it was the start to a violent, drunken outburst, police say. William Banks was outraged when he was denied another alcoholic beverage shortly after midnight June 22 at the popular chicken wing restaurant, according to the Spartanburg Police Department. In less than an hour after being refused service, the South Carolina man threatened to shoot multiple members of the Wild Wing Cafe staff, assaulted his waitress, then told the officer arresting him he would get him fired, police reported. The waitress said she cut Banks off from alcohol after observing how drunk he was, causing him to become "irate and (he) started cussing her out when she refused him anymore alcohol," according to the police report. Police said Banks then tried to order a drink from the manager, who also refused him service because of his intoxicated state. Banks responded by swearing at the manager and "threatened to shoot her," police say. Banks then returned his focus to his waitress, directing vulgarities at her and "threatening to shoot her, as well," police reported. As the waitress tried to walk away, Banks struck her in the head, according to the incident report, which said a bartender witnessed the assault. At this point, the son of a staff member removed Banks from the restaurant by "physically carrying him outside," police said. The responding police officer found Banks walking down the street and detained the 49-year-old man, according to an incident report. A person who was with Banks at the restaurant during the incident told police "Banks was extremely intoxicated ... and knew Banks was wrong," the report said. After the waitress identified Banks, he was arrested. As Banks was being taken to the Spartanburg County Detention Center, he threatened the officer's job, saying "he knew who worked at the Spartanburg Police Department," according to the incident report. Banks, of Spartanburg, was charged with third-degree assault and battery, and trespassing after notice, according to jail records, which showed he was released the same day without bond. Tech Support Pits From: Frieda Re: Firefox poblem Dear Webby, What's up with Firefox. All of a sudden when I try tiopen some mail I get a pop up saying couldn't load XPCOM. If Firefox decided to dump XP computers they gave me no warning. I went to Firefox sometime ago because Google kept saying a lot of my contacts did not have a secure site. Everything was fine until a couple days ago. How are you getting along? Sure has been an odd summer down here in States, weatherwise. Any thoughts on my problem will be appreciated. Frieda Dear Frieda Your FireFox is trashed. This method has worked for most of the users and it is very easy to follow. Get into Chrome or Internet Explorer or another browser, simply head over to the following address to download the latest setup file for Firefox, run it and install. https://www.mozilla.org/en-US/firefox/new/ By the way, if you use Chrome or Gmail, the message of sites not being secure is meaningless. It just tells you that some sites, that don't need security, like for example the Humor Letter, don't have the same security as the bank. So what? You are not entering your bank info or your bra size in the Humor Letter. Don't worry about that. Have FUN DearWebby Automatically move ALL your settings and programs. No need to re-install them. The only mover recommended by Intel and Microsoft. The company next door was encountering so many errors, they are now seriously considering buying a computer to blame them on. | If you can help with the cost of the Humor Letter, please donate what you can! | |
Thanks to Kati for this picture: Finally found a way to stabilize my weight! I can't believe I was doing it wrong all these years. We must get the word out. Kati ____________________________________________________ Daily tip from Thriftyfun.com Store Craft Supplies in Tackle Boxes By ramya [1 Post, 1 Comment] I use fishing tackle boxes from Walmart or Kmart to store craft supplies or sewing notions like threads, buttons, needles, beads, etc. I also use one box for kids art supplies like crayons, pencils, markers, erasers, etc. They have adjustable plastic dividers that can be fixed to the size of the item you need to store. I store my earrings and jewelery in one and makeup accessories in another. These boxes have handles to carry them around easily and also stack well for easy storage. Tip provided by Thriftyfun.com ____________________________________________________ | | A brief compendium of art nouveau treasures. |
___________________________________________________ Mrs. Culpepper was almost in tears. "Oh Marie," she said to her maid, "I have reason to suspect that my husband is having an affair with his secretary." "I don't believe it for one minute." Marie snapped. "You're just saying that to make me jealous." ___________________________________________________ | Ophelia Dingbatter's NewsNo sermon and not suitable for church, just jokes and fun for grownups. Read it on-line or subscribe. If you subscribe, look for the double opt-in confirmation request. |
Thanks to Phil for this story: My two-year-old daughter, Paige, was with her mother while her older sister was being examined by a dentist. Paige kept herself busy playing with toys in the waiting room until she noticed that her mom was resting, her eyes closed. With about six other patients waiting, Paige marched up to her mother, looked her straight in the face and shook her shoulder. "Mommy," she yelled, "wake up! This is not church!" My wife, Lani, woke from her doze to the sound of the other patients laughing hysterically. ____________________________________________________ | Today, July 6 in 1483 King Richard III of England was crowned. 1699 Captain William Kidd, the pirate, was captured in Boston, MA, and deported back to England. 1777 British forces captured Fort Ticonderoga during the American Revolution. 1858 Lyman Blake patented the shoe manufacturing machine. 1885 Louis Pasteur successfully tested his anti-rabies vaccine. The child used in the test later became the director of the Pasteur Institute. 1905 Fingerprints were exchanged for the first time between officials in Europe and the U.S. The person in question was John Walker. 1917 During World War I, Arab forces led by T.E. Lawrence captured the port of Aqaba from the Turks. 1919 A British dirigible landed in New York at Roosevelt Field. It completed the first crossing of the Atlantic Ocean by an airship. 1923 The Union of Soviet Socialist Republics was established. 1928 "The Lights of New York" was previewed in New York's Strand Theatre. It was the first all-talking movie. 1942 Diarist Anne Frank and her family took refuge from the Nazis in Amsterdam. 1945 Nicaragua became the first nation to formally accept the United Nations Charter. 1947 "Candid Microphone" began airing on ABC radio. 1966 Malawi became a republic within the Commonwealth with Dr. Hastings Banda as its first president. 1967 The Biafran War erupted. The war lasted two-and-a-half years. About 600,000 people died. 1981 Former President of Argentina Isabel Peron was freed after five years of house arrest by a federal court. 1981 The Dupont Company announced an agreement to purchase Conoco, Inc. (Continental Oil Co.) for $7 billion. At the time it was the largest merger in corporate history. 1985 The submarine Nautilus arrived in Groton, Connecticut. The vessel had been towed from Mare Island Naval Shipyard. 1988 Several popular beaches were closed in New York City due to medical waste and other debris began washing up on the seashores. 1989 The U.S. Army destroyed its last Pershing 1-A missiles at an ammunition plant in Karnack, TX. The dismantling was under the terms of the 1987 Intermediate-range Nuclear Forces Treaty. 1997 The Mars Pathfinder released Sojourner, a robot rover on the surface of Mars. The spacecraft landed on the red planet on July 4th. 1997 In Cambodia, Second Prime Minister Hun Sen ousted First Prime Minister Norodom Ranariddh and claimed to have the capital under his control. 1998 Protestants rioted in many parts of Northern Ireland after British authorities blocked an Orange Order march in Portadown. 2000 A jury awarded former NHL player Tony Twist $24 million for the unauthorized use of his name in the comic book Spawn and the HBO cartoon series. Co-defendant HBO settled with Twist out of court for an undisclosed amount. 2018 Do smiled. |
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