Good Morning, Do, Today is Friday, April 6 Time to wear a bit of red to show your support for the troops!  I noticed that Broom Hilda's Hog is now whining against New York cops, because they defended themselves and New York against a suicider. Since he is the darling of the left-wing media, they praise him for that. In my opinion, he lost what little bit of credibility he had. Have FUN! Dearwebby Todays Bonehead Award: Utah gun-slinger robs gas station and tries carjacking Bonehead ______________________________________________________ Today, April 6 in 1909 Americans Robert Peary and Matthew Henson claimed to be the first men to reach the North Pole. See More of what happened on this day in history.
 ______________________________________________________ 
 If you can help with the cost of the Humor Letter, please donate what you can!
 
  
 ______________________________________________________ The ability to delude yourself may be an important survival tool. --- Jane Wagner I am a kind of paranoiac in reverse. I suspect people of plotting to make me happy. --- J. D. Salinger (1919 - ) _____________________________________________________ If you like the Humor Letter, please vote!  ______________________________________________________ An American was waiting on a London street corner. An attractive English girl was passing by when a gust of wind blew her dress above her waist. "A bit airy..." remarked the American. Hearing this, the Cockney girl replied indignantly, " 'ell yes! What did you expect ..... feathers?!" _____________________________________________________   ______________________________________________________   _____________________________________________________ 
 If you like the Humor Letter, please vote!  Thanks for your votes!
 _____________________________________________________ A man has six items in his bathroom a toothbrush, toothpastem, shaving cream, razor, a bar of Dial soap, and a towel from the Holiday Inn. The average number of items in the typical woman's bathroom is 437. A man would not be able to identify most of these items and what they are used for. _____________________________________________________ An INTERNATIONAL BONEHEAD AWARD has been earned by  Alexis Payan-Martinez, Murray, Utah  Utah gun-slinger robs gas station and tries carjacking  A man is accused of stealing beer from a Murray convenience store at gunpoint and trying to steal a person's car. Police said Alexis R. Payan-Martinez walked into a Maverik store near 514 W. 3900 S. on March 31. He was caught on surveillance video grabbing a case of beer, raising a semiautomatic handgun to a customer and employee and saying, come at me, bro. A few hours later, Unified Police responded to a carjacking where an officer recognized the suspect as the same person caught on video robbing the convenience store in Murray. Officers said Payan-Martinez later admitted to robbing the convenience store. He was booked into the Salt Lake County Jail for aggravated robbery.   Tech Support Pits From: David Re: Full Size Browser default  Dear Webby I've got a stupid question for you. It used to be, when I clicked on a link that opened a new page, it would come up as a full new page. Now when I click the link, I get a half page. I used to know how to change this but I haven't had to do it for so long that I've forgotten. A little help please. How do I change the size of a new page? BTW, I use IE. David  Dear David Viewing pages full size has gone out of fashion, because you don't see what might be opening behind it. Also, with the higher resolutions commonly used nowadays, you can comfortably have two pages open side by side if you squish them a bit. F11 toggles a window to full screen and back, on modern browsers too, not just IE. To set full screen as the default, even though Microsoft has agreed that is a dumb idea and refuses to tell you how to do it, follow this top secret rigmarole: Close all browser windows but one. Open a new window from a link on the remaining window. Close the old window (not the new one that just opened up). Adjust the window to be the size you want all the new windows to be (you cannot use the maximize button for this, you have to actually squish or stretch the size of the window to be what you want the windows to automatically open up as). Hold down the CTRL key while closing the window. From now on, all your new windows should open up to that size until you perform a similar process telling IE that you want all new windows to be the new size. Most likely what occurred is that you manually sized a window to that size, closed it, and IE remembered that as your preferred window size. Personally, I would highly recommend that you make your default browser size less than full screen. That way you notice when a page pops a "Pop-Under" and you won't accidentally agree to subscribe to all kinds of weird stuff. Many news sites use pop-unders to ask you if you want up-to-the- minute notifications of breaking news. You have to hit BLOCK to avoid that. The same goes for really weird stuff, that you most definitely DON'T want to notify you of their breaking news. Have FUN DearWebby    A man will remember how short a woman's dress was, for years. A woman will remember what color it was. 
 Automatically move ALL your settings and programs. No need to re-install them. The only mover recommended by Intel and Microsoft. 
 Women do laundry every couple of days. A man will wear every article of clothing he owns, including his surgical pants that were hip about eight years ago, before he will do his laundry. When he is finally out of clothes, he will wear a dirty sweatshirt inside out, rent a U-Haul and take his mountain of clothes to the laundromat, and expect to meet a beautiful woman while he is there. 
If you can help with the cost of the Humor Letter, please donate what you can!
 
  
 Two boys were arguing when the preacher entered the room. The preacher says, Why are you arguing? One of them answers, We found a ten dollar bill and decided to give it to whoever tells the biggest lie. You should be ashamed of yourselves, said the preacher, When I was your age I didn't even know what a lie was. The boys gave the ten dollars to the preacher. ____________________________________________________  Daily tip from Thriftyfun.com Mark Birthdays on Your New Calendar When putting up your new calendar for the new year, take a moment and fill in all the birthdays that you need to remember throughout the year. It's also good to note any anniversaries or other important dates. One good method is to flip through your old calendar and transfer any dates which apply to the new year.  Tip provided by Thriftyfun.com  ____________________________________________________  One day, a foreign family arrived in New York City. This was the first time out of their native village, and it didn't take long before the wife got lost. The husband asked a passerby for help and was told to go to the police and report it. When he got there, a police officer asked him for the wife's description. "What's that?" asked the man. "Well, you see a description is telling what something looks like. For example, my wife is 25-years-old, 5'11", 140 lbs, 38-25-36 measurements. Now, what can you tell me about your wife?" "The hell with her, lets go look for yours!"  
People Are Awesome! 
 ___________________________________________________ The widow lay crying on her psychiatrist's couch. "We were married twenty-five years before he died," she said, dabbing away a tear. "Never had an argument in all those years." "Amazing," said the doctor. "How did you do it?" "I outweighed him by sixty pounds and he was a coward." ___________________________________________________ 
 Ophelia Dingbatter's NewsNo sermon and not suitable for church, just jokes and fun for grownups. Read it on-line or subscribe. If you subscribe, look for the double opt-in confirmation request. 
 ____________________________________________________ 
 Today, April 6 in 1199 English King Richard I was killed by an arrow at the siege of the castle of Chaluz in France. 1607 An expedition led by Captain Christopher Newport arrived at the Spanish colony of Puerto Rico for supplies before continuing on their journey. On May 14, they went ashore and founded Jamestown, Virginia, as the first permanent English colony in America. 1652 Jan van Riebeeck established a settlement at Cape Town, South Africa. 1814 Granted sovereignty in the island of Elba and a pension from the French government, Napoleon Bonaparte abdicates at Fountainebleau. He was allowed to keep the title of emperor. 1830 Joseph Smith and five others organized the Mormon Church in western New York. 1830 Relations between the Texans and Mexico reached a new low when Mexico would not allow further emigration into Texas by settlers from the U.S. 1862 The American Civil War Battle of Shiloh began in Tennessee. 1865 At the Battle of Sayler's Creek, a third of Lee's army was cut off by Union troops pursuing him to Appomattox. 1875 Alexander Graham Bell was granted a patent for the multiple telegraph, which sent two signals at the same time. 1896 The first modern Olympic Games began in Athens, Greece. 1903 French Army Nationalists were revealed for forging documents to guarantee a conviction for Alfred Dryfus. 1909 Americans Robert Peary and Matthew Henson claimed to be the first men to reach the North Pole. 1916 Charlie Chaplin became the highest-paid film star in the world when he signed a contract with Mutual Film Corporation for $675,000 a year. He was 26 years old. 1917 The U.S. Congress approved a declaration of war on Germany and entered World War I on the Allied side. 1924 Four planes left Seattle on the first successful flight around the world. 1938 The United States recognized the German conquest of Austria. 1941 German forces invaded Greece and Yugoslavia. 1953 Iranian Premier Mossadegh demanded that the shah's power be reduced. 1965 U.S. President Lyndon B. Johnson authorized the use of ground troops in combat operations in Vietnam. 1967 In South Vietnam, 1,500 Viet Cong attacked Quangtri and freed 200 prisoners. 1981 A Yugoslav Communist Party official confirmed reports of intense ethnic riots in Kosovo. 1983 The U.S. Veteran's Administration announced it would give free medical care for conditions traceable to radiation exposure to more than 220,000 veterans who participated in nuclear tests from 1945 to 1962. 1985 William J. Schroeder became the first artificial heart recipient to be discharged from the hospital. 1987 Sugar Ray Leonard took the middleweight title from Marvin Hagler. 1988 Mathew Henson was awarded honors in Arlington National Cemetery. Henson had reached the North Pole with Robert Peary. 1998 Citicorp and Travelers Group announced that they would be merging. The new creation was the largest financial-services conglomerate in the world. The name would become Citigroup. 1998 Federal researchers in the U.S. announced that daily tamoxifen pills could cut breast cancer risk among high-risk women. 1998 Pakistan successfully tested medium-range missiles capable of attacking neighboring India. 2018 Do smiled. 
 
 

If you can help with the cost of the Humor Letter, please donate what you can!

If you like the Dear Webby Daily Humor Letter,
please vote for it at the Ezine Finder:
Thanks for your votes!

ARCHIVE: If you missed previous issues, you can see them
in the Humor Letter Blog at http://webby.com/humor/blog