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___________________________________________________ History: on this day, January 7, in 1989, Crown Prince Akihito became the emperor of Japan following the death of his father, Emperor Hirohito. ____________________________________________________ Bonehead Award: Wisconsin woman poisoned husband with animal euthanasia drugs _____________________________________________________ Q Little by little, one travels far. --- J. R. R. Tolkien (1892 - 1973) Politics is not a bad profession. If you succeed there are many rewards, if you disgrace yourself you can always write a book. --- Ronald Reagan (1911 - 2004) "Every parent has dreams for a child. In one dream, the kid is saying, "I'm proud to accept this Nobel Prize..." In the other dream, the kid is asking, "D'ya want fries with that?" --- Robin Williams ____________________________________________________ A Priest at a Church picnic was staring at a member of his parish wearing the tiniest of bikinis. A Nun walked over and said, "Shame on you Father, staring at that woman like that!" The Priest replied, "Sister Mary Elizabeth, I know you to be on a diet, and yet I saw you ogling the buffet." __________________________________________________ A bus stops and two Italian men get on. They seat themselves, and engage in animated conversation. The lady sitting behind them ignores their conversation at first, but her attention is galvanized when she hears one of the men say the following: "Emma come first. Den I come. Two asses, they come together. I come again. Two asses, they come together again. I come again and pee twice. Then I come once-a-more." "You foul-mouthed swine," retorted the lady indignantly. In this country we don't talk about our sex lives in public!" "Hey, coola down lady," said the man. Imma just tellun my friend, da bishop from Milano, how to spella Mississippi." __________________________________________________ Reported by Rock An International Bonehead Award has been earned by Amanda Chapin, 50, Monroe, Wisconsin, USA Wisconsin woman poisoned husband with animal euthanasia drugs A Wisconsin woman accused of repeatedly poisoning her veterinarian husband with animal euthanasia drugs has been charged with attempted first-degree intentional homicide. Amanda Chapin, 50, of Monroe, was charged Dec. 28 in Lafayette County. Authorities say she poisoned her 70- year-old husband, Gary Chapin, three times during July and August, by putting barbiturates in his coffee, the Wisconsin State Journal reported. According to a criminal complaint, the couple got married in March. Following the wedding, Amanda Chapin forged the signature of one of her husband's children on a power-of- attorney document, then demanded her husband amend his house deed so she would get the home if he died. The complaint says she poisoned her husband for the first time less than three weeks after the quit claim deed on the house was authorized. The third time he drank the allegedly poisoned coffee, in early August, he fell into a coma that lasted for four days, the complaint said. Bloodwork showed barbiturates in his system came from drugs he used to euthanize animals. Gary Chapin's son subsequently filed a restraining order against Amanda Chapin on his father's behalf and Gary Chapin has filed for divorce, according to online court records. According to the criminal complaint, Amanda Chapin violated the restraining order in September when she sent her husband a suicide note via email, writing that she had decided to kill herself because his children would "destroy" her. She repeatedly denied poisoning him. "The only thing I am guilty of is loving you SOOOOOOOOOO MUCH," the note, which was included in the complaint, said. She survived the suicide attempt after paramedics took her to a local hospital. Gary Chapin filed for divorce the next day. ___________________________________________________ ___________________________________________________ This farmer had a sick cow. The vet prescribed a daily suppository. The farmer's method for administering the prescription was to insert an aluminum tube into the cow's rear and blow the suppository in. One day the farmer was too sick to attend his cow, so he asked his hired hand to take care of the cow. The hired hand took the tube, and turned it around! Then blew the supository into the cow. The farmer's wife, who was standing nearby watching, asked the hired hand why he had turned the tube in the cow's rear around. He exclaimed "What! From the farmer's mouth into mine!" ___________________________________________________ If you can spare a coin, PLEASE hit PayPal with it! ___________________________________________________ House Sparrow _______________________________________________ >From Tom In my husband's work for a cable-television company, he encounters illegal hookups that drive up costs for other customers. One day he arrived at a repair job just as the homeowner was pulling into the driveway. She pointed the way to the den, where the tv was located, and then walked out to get the mail. As my husband approached the tv, he saw a note taped to the screen. It read: "Don't forget to hide the descramblers before the cable guy comes. Love, Tom." ------------------ In the 90s a couple of guys came to my office and wanted me to change a chip on a descrambler circuit board. Well, somehow I felt that those two guys were a bit too phonly for my taste, so I did not touch that cicuit board, and did not phone them back. Then a couple of months later O.J. Simpson got arrested and accused of having a descrambler circuit board and replacement chip. Bingo! Since he had not touched it either, they wound up dropping that charge and framed him in Las Vegas instead. I never forgot that silly stunt. ____________________________________________________ >From Millie Over the years, my husband and I have usually managed to decode the cute but confusing gender signs sometimes put on restaurants' restroom doors (Buoys and Gulls, Laddies and Lassies, etc.), but every so often we get stumped. Recently my husband Dave wandered off in search of the men's room and found himself confronted by two marked doors. One was labeled "Bronco," and the other was designated "Cactus." Completely baffled, he stopped a restaurant employee. "Excuse me; I need to use the restroom," he said, gesturing toward the doors, "Which one should I use?" "Actually, we would prefer you to go there," the employee said, pointing to a door down the hall marked "Men." "Bronco and Cactus are our private dining rooms." __________________________________________________ If you can spare a coin, PLEASE hit PayPal with it! _____________________________________________________ DearWebby's Tech Support Pits FROM: Rosa RE: Gold conductor Dear Webby I see gold is used for the more expensive audio connectors and for electronic circuit boards. Would that not indicate it is a better conductor than copper? Rosa Dear Rosa The currents involved in electronics are so low that connectivity makes no difference. Extremely thin gold plating is used because it never oxidizes and never changes. The gold plating is much thinner than any paint. The actual conduction of the electricity is done by the copper under the plating. In addition to that, gold costs over $1200 per 12 gram gold ounce, whereas copper is around $5/lb. Have FUN DearWebby _____________________________________________________ >From Kate Part of my job as a public-health nurse is teaching new parents how to care for their infants. As I was demonstrating how to wrap a newborn, a young Asian couple turned to me and said, "You mean we should wrap the baby like an egg roll?" Yes, I replied, that was a good analogy. "I don't know how to make egg rolls," another mother said anxiously. "Can I wrap my baby like a burrito?" ____________________________________________________ Today, January 7 in 1558, Calais, the last English possession on mainland France, was recaptured by the French. 1610, Galileo Galilei sighted four of Jupiter's moons. He named them Io, Europa, Ganymede, and Callisto. 1782, The Bank of North America opened in Philadelphia. It was the first commercial bank in the United States. 1785, French aeronaut/balloonist Jean-Pierre Blanchard successfully made the first air-crossing of the English Channel from the English coast to France. 1789, Americans voted for the electors that would choose George Washington to be the first U.S. president. 1887, Thomas Stevens completed the first worldwide bicycle trip. He started his trip in April 1884. Stevens and his bike traveled 13,500 miles in almost three years time. 1894, W.K. Dickson received a patent for motion picture film. 1896, The "Fannie Farmer Cookbook" was published. 1904, The distress signal "CQD" was established. Two years later "SOS" became the radio distress signal because it was quicker to send by wireless radio. 1927, Transatlantic telephone service began between New York and London. 31 calls were made on this first day. 1927, In Hinckley IL, the Harlem Globetrotters played their first game. 1929, The debut of "Buck Rogers 2429 A.D." occurred in newspapers around the U.S. The title of the comic strip was later changed to "Buck Rogers in the 25th Century." 1932, Chancellor Heinrich Brning declared that Germany cannot, and will not, resume reparations payments. 1935, French Foreign Minister Pierre Laval and Italian Prime Minister Benito Mussolini signed the Italo-French agreements. 1940, "Gene Autrys Melody Ranch" debuted on CBS Radio. The show aired for 16 years. 1941, The NBC Blue radio network presented "The Squeaky Door" for the first time. The show was later known as "Inner Sanctum." 1942, The World War II siege of Bataan began. 1949, The announcement of the first photograph of genes was shown at the University of Southern California in Los Angeles. 1953, U.S. President Harry Truman announced the development of the hydrogen bomb. 1954, The Duoscopic TV receiver was unveiled this day. The TV set allowed the watching of two different shows at the same time. 1959, The United States recognized Fidel Castro's new government in Cuba. 1968, The cost of a U.S. first class stamp was raised to 6 cents. 1975, OPEC agreed to raise crude oil prices by 10%, which began a time of world economic inflation. 1979, Vietnamese forces captured the Cambodian capital of Phnom Penh, overthrowing the Khmer Rouge government. 1980, U.S. President Jimmy Carter signed legislation that authorized $1.5 billion in loans for the bail out of Chrysler Corp. 1989, Crown Prince Akihito became the emperor of Japan following the death of his father, Emperor Hirohito. 1990, The Leaning Tower of Pisa was closed to the public. The accelerated rate of "leaning" raised fears for the safety of its visitors. 1996, Alvaro Arzu was elected president of Guatemala. 1996, One of the biggest blizzards in U.S. history hit the eastern states. More than 100 deaths were later blamed on the severe weather. 1998, Former White House intern Monica Lewinsky signed an affidavit denying that she had an affair with U.S. President Clinton. 1999, U.S. President Clinton went on trial before the Senate. It was only the second time in U.S. history that an impeached president had gone to trial. Clinton was later acquitted of perjury and obstruction of justice charges. 2002, Microsoft Corp. chairman Bill Gates introduced a new device code named Mira. The device was tablet-like and was a cross between a handheld computer and a TV remote control. 2009, Russia shut off all gas supplies to Europe through Ukraine. Prime Minister Vladimir Putin publicly endorsed the move and urged greater international involvement in the energy dispute. 2022 Do smiled.
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