Good Morning, Do, Today is Friday, December 29 Time to wear a bit of red to show your support for the troops!  Have FUN! Dearwebby Todays Bonehead Award: Georgia man pulls gun at Burger King after complaining about slow service  Bonehead ______________________________________________________ Today, December 29 in 1170 St. Thomas Becket, the 40th archbishop of Canterbury, was murdered in his own cathedral by four knights acting on Henry II's orders.  See More of what happened on this day in history.
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 ______________________________________________________ We forfeit three-fourths of ourselves in order to be like other people. --- Arthur Schopenhauer (1788 - 1860) Inanimate objects are classified scientifically into three major categories - those that don't work, those that break down and those that get lost. --- Russell Baker ______________________________________________________ If you like the Humor Letter, please vote!  ______________________________________________________ Once there was a little boy who lived in the country. For bathroom facilities, they had to use an outhouse. The little boy hated it because it was hot in the summer, cold in the winter and stank all the time. The outhouse was sitting on the bank of a creek and the boy determined that one day he would push that outhouse into the water. One day after a spring rain, the creek was swollen so the little boy decided today was the day to push the outhouse into the creek. So he got a large stick and pushed. Finally, the outhouse toppled into the creek and floated away. That evening his dad sternly told him to sit down. Knowing he was in trouble, the little boy asked why. The dad replied, "Someone pushed the outhouse into the creek today. It was you, wasn't it, son?" The boy answered yes. Then he thought a moment and said, "Dad, I read in school today that George Washington chopped down a cherry tree and didn't get into trouble because he told the truth." The dad replied, "Well, son, George Washington's father wasn't in that cherry tree!" ____________________________________________________ Jack was driving home after a hard days work, and he was not in a good mood. Nothing at the office had gone right, and so when he was about to make the turn off and a car came wildly careening around the corner in his lane, he was furious! To make matters worse, the lady driving the car, a former neighbor whom he knew well, stuck her head out the window and screamed, "PIG! PIG!" Jack couldn't contain himself any longer. He rolled down his window, stuck his head out, and shouted, "OLD BATTLE AXE!" Still fuming, he drove around the corner . . . and ran into a pig, standing in the middle of the road. _____________________________________________________   ______________________________________________________   While looking for a nice picture I cam across this one from 2008. Had to laugh about the description I had given it: The view from my desk showed a smokey sunset again last night. Those forest fires just south of the border have been putting more greenhouse gases and hot air into the atmosphere every day, than all the politicians of the world combined can do in a year. If those fires are not extinguished soon, then all the global warming and ice age fear mongering theories will have to be reversed AGAIN. Those theory reversals just make the ecologists sound like McCain or Kerry. Amusing, but not very credible. ____________________________________ 
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 _____________________________________________________ Coming through the door after school one day, Little Johnny hollers out..."Okay everyone in the house, please stand advised that I, Little Johnny Elvis Smith, have on this date made a complete ass of myself in sex-education class, by repeating stories concerning storks, as told to me by certain parties residing in this house!" _____________________________________________________ An INTERNATIONAL BONEHEAD AWARD has been earned by  Emanjula Daracus Brown, Lawrenceville, Georgia  Georgia man pulls gun at Burger King after complaining about slow service  A man threw a drink and pointed a gun at Burger King employees in Georgia on Dec. 23 because he and his family were not served promptly, according to a police report. Emanjula Daracus Brown was with his wife and three children at the Burger King in Lawrenceville waiting for food, according to the report. Employees told police that Brown and his wife, who was not arrested, became irate and began throwing drinks at the employees while waiting for their order. Brown also pulled a gun out and pointed it at the employees, they told police. Brown and his family had left the restaurant by the time officers arrived, but an officer soon pulled Brown's car over, the report said. Brown told the officer that he was being respectful and polite at the Burger King, where he was in a long line of people waiting for food. Brown said he saw a manager on her phone, not helping prepare food, and asked her to get off her phone and assist in completing the orders. The manager responded very rudely and began to get in his face, Brown told police. Brown said he continued to be polite, but the manager threw a cup of liquid at him. Brown then threw a cup of liquid at the manager and demanded a refund, he told police. The manager then threw a cup of coffee at Brown and threatened to throw hot oil at him, Brown told police. Brown's wife got a gun from their car, but Brown took it from her and put it in his back pocket, he told police. While Brown was stopped and interviewed by a police officer, another officer reviewed surveillance footage and interviewed the manager that Brown said threw beverages at him. Brown was arrested, and the manager was not. Brown has been charged with simple battery, battery, aggravated assault, criminal trespass damage, possession of a firearm or knife during the commission of a felony, misdemeanor third-degree child cruelty and felony third- degree child cruelty. More charges may be added. Bullshitting the police is frowned upon.  _________________________________  Tech Support Pits From: Tiny Re: Headset Dear Webby, I'm interested in getting a mic. for my computer. Preferably one with a headset. Could you reccomend a good one with little or no feedback and distortion? Thanks in advance! Tiny  Dear Tiny Modern headsets don't have feedback or distortion problems. As long as you avoid the single ear types, just about any headset will be fine. Cup types are more comfortable than ON-Ear, and those are more comfortable than IN-Ear. With Cup and ON-Ear the leather (or fake leather) cushion types are more comfortable and usually have better acoustics than the bare foam cushion types, but are also more expensive. Unless you have "tall hair", traditional over-the-head hoops are more comfortable than behind-the-head horizontal hoops. If you browse to http://dalco.com and type headset into the search field, you will see about 10 headsets ranging from $6 to just over $20. They even have a wireless headset for under $10. If you want top quality sound, try their Cyber Accoustics Pro, but if you are just going to use it for hands free phone calls via Skype, the $6 headset is quite good enough. Skype is quite good at filtering out non-essential backgrounds. Have FUN! DearWebby   
Automatically move ALL your settings and programs. No need to re-install them. The only mover recommended by Intel and Microsoft.  There was a farmer who sold a pound of butter to the baker. One day the baker decided to weigh the butter to see if he was getting a pound and he found that he was not. This angered him and he took the farmer to court. The judge asked the farmer if he was using any measure. The farmer replied, your Honor, I am primitive. I don't have a proper measure, but I do have a scale." The judge asked, "Then how do you weigh the butter?" The farmer replied "Your Honor, long before the baker started buying butter from me, I have been buying a pound loaf of bread from him. Every day when the baker brings the bread, I put it on the scale and give him the same weight in butter. If anyone is to be blamed, it is the baker." 
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 Inanimate objects are classified scientifically into three major categories - those that don't work, those that break down and those that get lost. --- Russell Baker ____________________________________________________  Daily tip from Thriftyfun.com Empty Tennis Ball Containers If you have a tennis player in the family, save those empty tennis ball containers. They are the perfect size for bringing silverware to a cookout or picnic. You can also use them to hold you tent stakes when you go camping. Tip provided by Thriftyfun.com font>  ____________________________________________________  "Oh Doctor, My husband thinks he is a chicken." "Oh no - how long has this been going on?" "About a year!" "A year! Why did you wait so long to come see me?" "Well, we needed the eggs."  
 
Removing 200 years of varnish from a painting. 
 A class professor was giving a lecture on company slogans and was asking his students if they were familiar with them. "Joe," he asked, "which company has the slogan, 'come fly the friendly skies'?" Joe answered the correct airline. "Brenda, can you tell me which company has the slogan, "Don't leave home without it?" Brenda answered the correct credit card company with no difficulty. "Now John, Tell me which company bears the slogan, 'Just do it'?" John answered, "Mom." ___________________________________________________ 
 Ophelia Dingbatter's NewsNo sermon and not suitable for church, just jokes and fun for grownups. Read it on-line or subscribe. If you subscribe, look for the double opt-in confirmation request. 
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 Today, December 29, in 1170 St. Thomas Becket, the 40th archbishop of Canterbury, was murdered in his own cathedral by four knights acting on Henry II's orders. 1812 The USS Constitution won a battle with the British ship HMS Java about 30 miles off the coast of Brazil. Before Commodore William Bainbridge ordered the sinking of the Java he had her wheel removed to replace the one the Constitution had lost during the battle. 1813 The British burned Buffalo, NY, during the War of 1812. 1837 Canadian militiamen destroyed the Caroline, a U.S. steamboat docked at Buffalo, NY. 1848 U.S. President James Polk turned on the first gas light at the White House. 1860 The HMS Warrior, Britain's first seagoing iron-hulled warship, was launched. 1888 The first performance of Macbeth took place at the Lyceum Theatre. 1890 The U.S. Seventh Cavalry massacred over 400 men, women and children at Wounded Knee Creek, SD. This was the last major conflict between Indians and U.S. troops. 1895 The Jameson Raid from Mafikeng into Transvaal, which attempted to overthrow Kruger's Boer government, started. 1911 Sun Yat-sen became the first president of a republican China. 1913 "The Unwelcome Throne" was released by Selig's Polyscope Company. This was a moving picture and the first serial motion picture. 1934 Japan renounced the Washington Naval Treaty of 1922 and the London Naval Treaty of 1930. 1940 During World War II, Germany began dropping incendiary bombs on London. 1945 The mystery voice of Mr. Hush was heard for the first time on the radio show, "Truth or Consequences", hosted by Ralph Edwards. 1945 Sheb Wooley recorded the first commercial record made in Nashville, TN. 1949 KC2XAK of Bridgeport, Connecticut became the first ultrahigh frequency (UHF) television station to begin operating on a regular daily schedule. 1952 The first transistorized hearing aid was offered for sale by Sonotone Corporation. 1975 A bomb exploded in the main terminal of New York's LaGuardia Airport. 11 people were killed. 1985 Phil Donahue and a Soviet radio commentator hosted the "Citizens' Summit" via satellite TV. 1986 The Biltmore Hotel in Coral Gables, FL, reopened for business after eighteen years and $47 million expended on restoration. 1989 Following Hong Kong's decision to forcibly repatriate some Vietnamese refugees, thousands of Vietnamese 'boat people' battled with riot police. 1989 Vaclav Havel was elected president of Czechoslovakia by the country's Federal Assembly. He was the first non- Communist to hold the position in more than four decades. 1996 The Guatemalan government and leaders of the leftist Guatemalan National Revolutionary Union signed a peace accord in Guatemala City, ending a civil war that had lasted 36 years. 1997 Hong Kong began killing 1.25 million chickens, the entire population, for fear of the spread of 'bird flu.' 1998 Khmer Rouge leaders apologized for the 1970s genocide in Cambodia that claimed 1 million lives. 1999 The Nasdaq composite index closed at 4,041.46. It was the first close above 4,000. 2017 Do smiled. 
 
 

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