Good Morning, Do! Today is Saturday, August 20, 2022 Thank you, Richard ___________________________________________________ History on this day, August 20, in 1985, The original Xerox 914 copier was presented to the Smithsonian Institute's Museum of American History. Chester Carlson was the man who invented the machine. ____________________________________________________ International Bonehead Award Indiana rookie police officer murdered, killed during traffic stop. Prosecutor called for death penalty. _________________________________________________ A motion to adjourn is always in order. --- Robert Heinlein (1907 - 1988) I think that I shall never see a billboard lovely as a tree. Perhaps, unless the billboards fall, I'll never see a tree at all. --- Ogden Nash (1902 - 1971) No man is exempt from saying silly things; the mischief is to say them deliberately. --- Michel de Montaigne (1533 - 1592) Human beings, who are almost unique in having the ability to learn from the experience of others, are also remarkable for their apparent disinclination to do so. --- Douglas Adams (1952 - 2001) The purpose of life is to fight maturity. --- Dick Werthimer __________________________________________________ You know the world is going crazy when the best rapper is a white guy, the best golfer is a black guy, The Swiss hold the America's Cup, France is accusing the US of arrogance, and Germany doesn't want to go to war! __________________________________________________ Having passed the enlistment physical, Jon was asked by the doctor, "Why do you want to join the Navy, son?" "My father said it'd be a good idea, sir." "Oh? And what does your father do?" "He's in the Army, sir." ___________________________________________________   Even tough an anAnti-American moron has forbidden new oil drilling, a judge figured out how to allow it again, in SOME states. __________________________________________________  Reported by Rock An INTERNATIONAL BONEHEAD AWARD has been earned by  Carl Roy Webb Boards II, 42, Indiana, USA  Indiana rookie police officer murdered, killed during traffic stop. Prosecutor called for death penalty.  Madison County Prosecutor Rodney Cummings announced that his office is seeking the death penalty for a suspect accused of shooting and killing a 24-year-old police officer during a traffic stop last month. Carl Roy Webb Boards II, 42, is facing charges of murder, resisting law enforcement and possession of a firearm by a violent felon in the shooting death of Elwood Police Officer Noah Shahnavaz. Shahnavaz, who had been with the department for 11 months after serving five years in the U.S. Army, attempted to pull Boards over around 2 a.m. on July 31. Boards allegedly got out of his vehicle and fired dozens of rounds from a rifle after pulling over, striking Shahnavaz once in the head through his cruiser's windshield. Deputies from the Hamilton County Sheriff's Office then pursued Boards and took him into custody after performing two PIT maneuvers on his vehicle. "This is my 24th year in law as a prosecutor. My career has been in law enforcement. Ive never seen a police shooting like this, never heard of one anywhere in the country. Part of the issue is, is it among the worst of the worst? Absolutely it is," the prosecutor, Cummings, said at a press conference on Wednesday. The Elwood Police Department set a cruiser up outside of their headquarters to pay tribute to the slain officer. Shahnavaz's father, Matt, wore a pair of sunglasses at Wednesday's press conference and said people can remember his son by wearing a pair of sunglasses on the back of their head. A man who lived above a barbershop owned by Boards told police that the suspect recorded a "song making statements that if he was ever caught by police that he would kill them," according to a court filing. Boards' attorney did not immediately respond to a request for comment on Wednesday. The Associated Press contributed to this report. _____________________________________________________   __________________________________________________ Having just moved into his new office, a pompous, new colonel was sitting at his desk when an airman knocked on the door. Conscious of his new position, the colonel quickly picked up the phone, told the airman to enter, then said into the phone, "Yes, General, I'll be seeing him this afternoon and I'll pass along your message. In the meantime, thank you for your good wishes, sir." Feeling as though he had sufficiently impressed the young enlisted man, he asked, "What do you want?" "Nothing important, sir," the airman replied, "just here to hook up your telephone." ___________________________________________________ DearWebby's Tech Support Pits  From: George RE: How to fix privacy defaults Dear Webby, W10 seems to be changing my privacy and data permissions worse than your avergae high school hacker. How can I check and correct that? George  Dear George Use the Start Menu to search for and run the Settings app, then click Privacy. In the left-hand pane, you'll see many areas where your computer might be sharing data. It's worth spending time checking that you're comfortable with allowing apps to use your computer's camera, microphone, account information and so on, and where you are, checking that no surprise apps appear in the lists. Note, too, that the default Feedback & diagnostics setting is to send enhanced data to Microsoft. If Windows Defender is using and abusing you, click the back arrow and select Update & Security, then Windows Defender. Check that you're happy with the default behaviour, which is to enable Cloud-based detection and Automatic sample submission. Just change anything and everything to NO. In the extremely unlikely event that you have to allow any of that, like your camera and microphone for using ZOOM or Skype with your doctor, then you can always temporarily allow it. For the rest of the time, nobody needs to listen to your farts or watch you picking your nose. HaveFUN! DearWebby _____________________________________________________ Officer: Soldier, do you have change for a dollar? Soldier: Sure, buddy. Officer: That's no way to address an officer! Now let's try it again. Soldier: Do you have change for a dollar? Soldier: No, SIR! ___________________________________________________ In the Ozarks, there was a mountaineer that was reputed to have the best hunting dog ever, by the name of Co-pilot. Three city folks went up in the mountains and wanted to rent him. "Good huntin dog, gonna cost ya $50.00 a day." They agreed, and three days later came back with the limit. The next year they came back. "Co-pilot got better, gonna cost ya $75.00 a day." Again they agreed, and 2 days later came back with the limit. The third year they came back and told the mountaineer they had to have Co-pilot, even if it cost $100.00 a day. "You can have the worthless mutt for $5.00 a day, and I'm overcharging you $4.00." "But we don't understand, what happened to him?" "Well, a crew from that there air base in Okaloosa County Florida come up and rented him. One of them idiots called him pilot, and he's been sitting on his ass barkin ever since." _____________________________________________ If you can help with the cost of the Humor Letter, please donate what you can! If you like my work,Please donate a dollar, or two, if you can afford it!Please, help me stay online! ____________________________________________________ Ophelia Dingbatter's News No sermon and not suitable for church, just jokes and fun for grownups. Read it on-line or subscribe. If you subscribe, look for the double opt- in confirmation request. ____________________________________________________  Today, August 20, in 1741, Danish navigator Vitus Jonas Bering discovered Alaska. 1866, The National Labor Union in the U.S. advocated an eight-hour workday. 1866, It was formally declared by U.S. President Andrew Johnson that the American Civil War was over. The fighting had stopped months earlier. 1882, Tchaikovsky's "1812 Overture" debuted in Moscow. 1914, German forces occupied Brussels, Belgium, during World War I. 1918, The British opened its Western Front offensive during World War I. 1923, The first American dirigible, the "Shenandoah," was launched in Lakehurst, NJ. The ship began its maiden voyage from the same location on September 4. 1940, France fell to the Germans during World War II. 1953, It was announced by the Soviet Union that they had detonated a hydrogen bomb. 1955, In Morocco and Algeria hundreds of people were killed in anti-French rioting. 1955, Colonel Horace A. Hanes, a U.S. Air Force pilot, flew to an altitude of 40,000 feet. Hanes reached a speed of 822.135 miles per hour in a Super Sabrejet. 1964, A $1 billion anti-poverty measure was signed by U.S. President Lyndon B. Johnson. 1967, The New York Times reported about a noise reduction system for album and tape recording developed by technicians R. and D.W. Dolby. Elektra Record's subsidiary, Checkmate Records became the first label to use the new Dolby process in its recordings. 1968, The Soviet Union and other Warsaw Pact nations began invading Czechoslovakia to crush the "Prague Spring" liberalization. 1977, Voyager 2 was launched by the United States. The spacecraft is carrying a 12 inch copper phonograph record containing greetings in dozens of languages, samples of music and sounds of nature. 1985, The original Xerox 914 copier was presented to the Smithsonian Institute's Museum of American History. Chester Carlson was the man who invented the machine. 1991, A rally of more than 100,000 people occurred outside the Russian parliament building to protest the coup that removed Gorbachev from power. 1997, NATO troops seized six police stations in Banja Luka that had been held by troops controlled by former Bosnian Serb President Radovan Karadzic. 1997, Britain began voluntary evacuation of its Caribbean island of Montserrat due to the volcanic activity of the Soufriere Hills. 1998, Canada's Supreme Court announced that Quebec could not secede without the federal government's consent. 1998, U.S. military forces attacked a terrorist camp in Afghanistan and a chemical plant in Sudan. Both targets were chosen for cruise missile strikes due to their connection with Osama bin Laden. 1998, The U.N. Security Council extended trade sanctions against Iraq for blocking arms inspections. 2010, The last American combat brigade exited Iraq after more than seven years after the U.S.-led invasion began. 2022 Do! smiled.