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 Good Morning, Do, Today is Friday, October 20 Time to wear a bit of red to show your support for the troops!  Have Fun! Dearwebby Todays Bonehead Award: Six arrested for armed robbery in Canton during alleged drug deal  Bonehead ______________________________________________________ Today, Oct 20 in 1740 Maria Theresa became the ruler of Austria, Hungary and Bohemia with the death of her father, Holy Roman Emperor Charles VI. Maria Theresa put together an empire, in which the sun never set, was always up somewhere. She had 23 kids while being empress. See More of what happened on this day in history.
Beware of all enterprises that require new clothes. ---Henry David Thoreau (1817 - 1862) Speak when you are angry and you will make the best speech you will ever regret. --- Ambrose Bierce ______________________________________________________
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______________________________________________________ From Hania At a wedding ceremony, the soft-spoken pastor asked if anyone had anything to say concerning the union of the bride and the groom. "Speak now, or forever hold your peace" he implored. That moment of utter silence was broken when a young woman carrying a child stood up and started walking toward the pastor, slowly. The new-born's whimpers echoed inside the church. Everything quickly turned to chaos. The bride slapped the groom. The groomsmen gave each other "knowing" looks. The groom's mother fainted. The Bride's parents quickly escorted their daughter out of the chapel. The Groom turned beet red in embarrassment as onlookers left the ceremony in a panic. The pastor asked the woman, "Can you tell us why you came forward? What do you have to say?" The woman replied, "We can't hear in the back of the chapel." ______________________________________________________ If you like the Humor Letter, please vote! ______________________________________________________ From Phil I took a part time job as an opinion poll sampler, calling people for their views on various issues. On my very first call, I introduced myself, "Hello, this is a telephone poll." The man replied, "Yeah, and this is a street light!" _____________________________________________________ Malwarebytes for Home | Anti-Malware Premium | Free Trial Download ______________________________________________________ An elderly woman had just returned to her home from an evening church service when she was startled by an intruder. As she caught the man in the act of robbing her home of its valuables, she yelled, "Stop! Acts 2:38!" (..repent and be baptized....) The burglar stopped dead in his tracks. The woman calmly called the police and explained what she had done. As the officer cuffed the man to take him in, he asked the burglar, "Why did you just stand there? All the old lady did was yell a scripture to you." "Scripture??'' replied the burglar, "She said she had an axe and two 38's!!!'' ______________________________________________________ _____________________________________________________
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______________________________________________________ An INTERNATIONAL BONEHEAD AWARD has been earned by William Harris, 19, of Acworth Shamer Jones , 19, of Canton Marissa Lemieux, 18, of Jasper Brittany McGuire, 19, of Jasper Deshaun Tiller, 18, of Canton Nicole Clary, 18, of Jasper Georgia Six arrested for armed robbery in Canton during alleged drug deal Six people in Canton face serious charges after they were arrested in connection with an armed robbery which happened Thursday night. Police said a group of suspects set up the victim to meet them on Jefferson Circle last Thursday. According to officers, the armed suspects then stole cash and narcotics from the victim and drove away. The victim called 911 to report the crime and police were able to catch up with the suspects during a traffic stop. Officials seized the gun used in the robbery, as well as what investigators call "a felony amount of drugs." Those arrested were: William Harris, 19, of Acworth Shamer Jones , 19, of Canton Marissa Lemieux, 18, of Jasper Brittany McGuire, 19, of Jasper Deshaun Tiller, 18, of Canton Nicole Clary, 18, of Jasper All were charged with armed robbery, aggravated assault, and possession of cocaine with intent to distribute Police said charges are also forthcoming on Shaud Pinzon, 20, of Duluth, who was identified by investigators as the victim. Those charges could include possession of cocaine with intent to distribute, according to police. _________________________________ Tech Support Pits From: Annelise Re: Recognize Spoofs Dear Webby, Is there an easy way to recognize spoofs like the fake mails from PayPal, banks and postcards? Annelise Dear Annelise Yes, there is. Hover your mouse over the embedded links and watch the bottom status line. It will show you where the link actually goes to. If it goes to some number domain instead of the one it pretends to go to, or to a Russian domain (...ru), or any domain other than where it pretends to go to, then trash that mail. Have FUN! DearWebby

Two women came before wise King Solomon, dragging between them a young man. "This young man agreed to marry my daughter," said one. "No! He agreed to marry MY daughter," said the other. And so they haggled before the King, until he called for silence. "Bring me my biggest sword," said Solomon, " and I shall hew the young man in half. Each of you shall receive a half." "Sounds good to me,"said the first lady. But the other woman said, "Oh Sire, do not spill innocent blood. Let the other woman's daughter marry him." The wise king did not hesitate a moment. "The young man must marry the first lady's daughter," he proclaimed. "But she was willing to hew him in two!" exclaimed the king's court. "Indeed," said wise King Solomon. "That shows she is the TRUE mother-in-law."
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Daily tip from Thriftyfun.com Additional Warranties at Checkout At checkout at electronic stores, the clerk will always offer you an additional warranty. The script usually sounds a little like this: "Would like addition buyers protection on this product for only $20.00". Only buy products that have good warranties in the first place, and say "No" when a checker offers you an impulse warranty on electronics. If you are afraid that the product will not last past the manufacturers warranty, it's probably not worth buying. Also, your credit card may offer extended warranties on purchased items already. Tip provided by Thriftyfun.com ____________________________________________________ One summer evening, during a violent thunderstorm, a mother was tucking her small boy into bed. She was about to turn off the light when he asked with a tremor in his voice, "Mommy, will you sleep with me tonight?" The mother smiled and gave him a reassuring hug. "I can't dear," she said, "I have to sleep with daddy." A long silence was broken at last by a shaken little voice saying, "The big sissy." __________________________________________________
Well preserved modernist homes of pre-revolutionary Cuba.
___________________________________________________ A YOUNG WOMAN inherited a home that had been built by distant relatives. Before she could take possession of the property, however, government surveyors had to decide whether it was located in the United States or Canada. When they declared the home was just inside the U.S. border, the young woman was very much relieved. I'm glad to hear that, she admitted. I've been told that Canadian winters are quite severe.
Ophelia Dingbatter's NewsNo sermon and not suitable for church, just jokes and fun for grownups. Read it on-line or subscribe. If you subscribe, look for the double opt-in confirmation request.
Thanks to Walter, the stonecarver from http://stoncarver.com for this joke: Every day, a male co-worker walks up very close to a lady standing at the coffee machine, inhales a big breath of air and tells her that her hair smells nice. After a week of this, she can't stand it anymore, takes her complaint to a supervisor in the personnel department and states that she wants to file a sexual harassment grievance against him. The Human Resources supervisor is puzzled by this decision and asks, what's sexually threatening about a co-worker telling you your hair smell nice?" The woman replies, "Its Keith, the midget." ____________________________________________________
 Today, October 20, in 1740 Maria Theresa became the ruler of Austria, Hungary and Bohemia with the death of her father, Holy Roman Emperor Charles VI. Maria Theresa put together an empire, in which the sun never set, was always up somewhere. She had 23 kids while being empress. 1774 The new Continental Congress, the governing body of America's colonies, passed an order proclaiming that all citizens of the colonies "discountenance and discourage all horse racing and all kinds of gaming, cock fighting, exhibitions of shows, plays and other expensive diversions and entertainment." 1803 The U.S. Senate approved the Louisiana Purchase. 1818 The U.S. and Great Britain established the boundary between the U.S. and Canada to be the 49th parallel. 1827 The Battle of Navarino took place during the Greek War for Independence. 1873 A Hippodrome was opened in New York City by showman Phineus T. (P.T.) Barnum. 1892 The city of Chicago dedicated the World's Columbian Exposition. 1903 A joint commission ruled in favor of the U.S. concerning a dispute over the boundary between Canada and the District of Alaska. 1910 A baseball with a cork center was used in a World Series game for the first time. 1930 "The Adventures of Sherlock Holmes" debuted on NBC radio. 1935 Mao Zedong arrived in Hanoi after his Long March that took just over a year. He then set up the Chinese Communist Headquarters. 1942 Pierre Laval told the French labor that they must serve in Germany. 1944 Allied forces invaded the Philippines. 1944 During World War II, the Yugoslav cities of Belgrade and Dubrovnik were liberated. 1947 Hollywood came under scrutiny as the House Un-American Activities Committee opened hearings into alleged Communist influence within the motion picture industry. It drove the Communists underground and made them call themselves Socialists and Liberals. 1952 The Mau Mau uprising against white settlers began in Kenya. 1957 Walter Cronkite began hosting "The 20th Century." The show aired until January 4, 1970. 1968 Jackie Lee Bouvier Kennedy married Aristotle Onassis. 1979 The John F. Kennedy Library in Boston was dedicated. 1993 Attorney General Janet Reno warned the TV industry to limit the violence in their programs. 1994 The website WhiteHouse.gov was launched. 1995 Britain, France and the U.S. announced a treaty that banned atomic blasts in the South Pacific. 2003 A 40-year-old man went over Niagara Falls without safety devices and survived. He was charged with illegally performing a stunt. 2009 European astronomers discover 32 exoplanets. 2017 Do smiled.

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