Good Morning, Do!  
 Today is Tuesday, July 11 
 
 ____________________________________________________ History: today, July 11 in 1962, The first transatlantic TV transmission was sent through the Telstar I satellite. ___________________________________________ Bonehead  U.S. trials for man accused of kidnapping, sexually abusing 13 year old Edmonton girl rescheduled for fall 2023  ___________________________________________________ Q I passionately hate the idea of being with it, I think an artist has always to be out of step with his time. --- Orson Welles (1915 - 1985) "He is happiest, be he king or peasant, who finds happiness in his home." --- Johann Wolfgang von Goethe ---------------- In Highschool I had to learn ALL of Goethe's ballads, and be able to quote them withouot looking at a book. At the end of that year I promptly forgot every one of them, even though they were actually quite good. __________________________________________________ Anni was taking her time browsing through everything at a friend's yard sale, and said to her, "My husband is going to be very angry when he finds out I stopped at a yard sale." "I'm sure the old boy'll understand when you tell him about all the bargains," her friend replied. "Normally, yes," said Anni. "But he just broke his leg, and he's waiting for me to take him to the hospital to have it set." ___________________________________________________ If you can help with the cost of the Humor Letter, please donate what you can! ___________________________________________________   ___________________________________________________ A teacher asked one of her students, "What's the nation's capital?" The student said, "Washington DC." When asked what the 'DC' stood for, the student said, "Dot Com." ________________________________________________ A Bonehead award has been reported by Rock  Noah Madrano, 41, Oregon, USA  U.S. trials for man accused of kidnapping, sexually abusing 13 year old Edmonton girl rescheduled for fall 2023  Noah Madrano, 41, seen during a 2022 federal court appearance in which he pleaded not guilty to six charges including sexually exploiting a child, possessing child pornography and transporting a child with intent to engage in criminal sexual activity. He will face trials on state and federal charges later this year. PHOTO BY SUPPLIED After multiple postponements, U.S. trials for the Oregon podcast host accused of kidnapping and sexually abusing an Edmonton girl have been set for this fall. Noah Madrano, 41, had been scheduled to begin a federal trial in the U.S. District Court for the District of Oregon July 11, one year after he was arrested in a Portland suburb with a 13- year-old girl missing from her home in Edmonton. That trial is now scheduled to begin Nov. 7, said Oregon U.S. Attorneys Office spokesman Kevin Sonoff. Madrano faces six federal counts including sexual exploitation of children, transportation of a minor with intent to engage in criminal sexual activity and possession of child pornography. At the state level, Madrano faces additional charges, including first-degree sexual abuse, second-degree kidnapping and second-degree rape, which are next in court Oct. 2. He faces a maximum of life in prison on the federal charges, and 75 years for the state offences. Madrano was arrested July 2, 2022, in an Oregon City hotel with the Edmonton girl, who prosecutors allege Madrano groomed and sexually exploited online for more than a year before making contact with her on three trips to Canada. On his final visit, Madrano abducted the girl and took her across the border in the trunk of his car, prosecutors claim. Madrano is accused of using the girl to record child abuse material, including audio posted to Madranos show on Portland community radio station KBOO. In the audio clip, which was removed from KBOOs website after Madranos arrest, Madrano allegedly has phone sex with the Edmonton girl while pretending to be Republican politician Matt Gaetz. Madrano was denied bail in November and remains in custody. U.S. District Court for the District of Oregon Magistrate Judge Youlee Yim You said there were no conditions that could adequately protect the public and ensure Madrano appears in court. You called the allegations against Madrano some of the worst she has ever heard. Madranos lawyer, Greg Oliveros, did not respond to a request for comment. Edmonton Police have said Madrano could later face charges in Canada, but none have been laid and investigations are ongoing. If he gets 2 or 3 life sentences in Oregon, then there is no point in spending money on a legal aid lawyer for him in Edmonton. ___________________________________________________ An FBI agent was talking to a bank teller after the bank had been robbed for the third time by the same bandit. "Did you notice anything special about the man?" he asked. "Yes, he seems to be better dressed each time," the teller replied. __________________________________________________ A young man wanted to get his beautiful blonde wife something nice for their first wedding anniversary. So he decides to buy her a cell phone. She is all excited, she loves her phone. He shows her and explains to her all the features on the phone. The next day she goes shopping. Her phone rings and it's her husband. "Hi hun," he says, "how do you like your new phone?" She replies, "I just love it! It's so small and your voice is clear as a bell but there's one thing I don't understand though." "What's that, baby?" asks the husband. "How did you know I was at Walmart?" ___________________________________________________   Mercedes Martha-Francis ___________________________________________________ The weather was very hot and pastor Fred wanted desperately to take a dive in a nearby lake. Having forgotten to pack a swimming suit, he chose to skinny dip. After some delightful minutes of cool swimming, a pair of middle-aged ladies walked onto the shore in his direction. He panicked, got out of the water and grabbed a bucket lying in the sand nearby. He strategically positioned the bucket and sighed with relief. The ladies got nearby and looked at him. He felt awkward and wanted to move. Then one of the ladies said: "You know, I have a special gift, I can read minds." "Impossible," said the embarrassed pastor. "You can't really know what I think!" She said: "Yes, I do know. Right now I bet you think that the bucket you're holding has a bottom." ___________________________________________________  From:Joy Re: Icons kidnapped Dear Webby I let Gramma send some postcards from my computer, and now it's haunted! I had all my work icons arranged just right along the left margin, nice and tight in clusters for different projects, some of them slightly overlapping to save space but still accessible. Now they are all in rigid formation, all apart, and when I drag them to where they shold be, they jump back! HELP! Joy  Dear Joy Gramma seems to have accidentally turned on "Auto-Arrange", one of the least useful features as far as power users are concerned. Just right-click on any blank area on the desktop, choose ARRANGE ICONS, and take the checkmark off "Auto-Arrange". Done. Now they will stay where you put them. Have Fun! DearWebby ___________________________________________________________ A Congressman was once asked about his attitude toward whiskey. "If you mean the demon drink that poisons the mind, pollutes the body, desecrates family life, and inflames sinners, then I'm against it. "But if you mean the elixir of Christmas cheer, the shield against winter chill, the taxable potion that puts needed funds into public coffers to comfort little crippled children, then I'm for it." "This is my position, and I will not compromise!" ___________________________________________________ If you can spare a coin, PLEASE hit PayPal with it! _____________________________________________________ I boarded the train and took my seat. The seat next to me was empty, but not for long. A mother boarded with her 5- year-old daughter sat down in the seat beside me. I offered my seat to the little girl but Mom said no, she'd sit the young one on her lap. So here I am holding my roses, now with a little lady straining to see what I was holding. "What ya got, mister?" she asked. (Mom is getting a bit flustered and tells her to mind her business.) I leaned the "package" over a bit and she looks and says loudly, "Ohhhh, ROSES!, who are they for?" (Now, Mom is embarrassed and tapping her on the rear telling her to sit down.) I said, "They're for my girlfriend". She says again with a loud voice, "WOW, pretty RED ones, and a lot of them, too! Man, you really must have f***ed up!" Needless to say, nearly everyone on the train was in stitches, except her Mom, who was now desperately trying to assume an innocent shade of invisible __________________________________________________ If you can help with the cost of the humor letter, please donate what you can! If you like my work, please donate a dollar, or two, if you can afford it! Please, help me stay online! __________________________________________________ History Today July 11, in 1346, Charles IV of Luxembourg was elected Holy Roman Emperor in Germany. 1533, Henry VIII, who divorced his wife and became head of the church of England, was excommunicated from the Catholic Church by Pope Clement VII. 1708, The French were defeated at Oudenarde, Malplaquet, in the Netherlands by the Duke of Marlborough and Eugene of Savoy. 1742, A papal decree was issued condemning the disciplining actions of the Jesuits in China. 1786, Morocco agreed to stop attacking American ships in the Mediterranean for a payment of $10,000. They took the money but kept pirating. 1798, The U.S. Marine Corps was formally re-established by "An Act for Establishing a Marine Corps" passed by the U.S. Congress. The act also created the U.S. Marine Band. The Marines were first commissioned by the Continental Congress on November 10, 1775. 1804, The United States' first secretary of the treasury, Alexander Hamilton, was killed by Vice President Aaron Burr in a duel. 1864, In the U.S., Confederate forces led by Gen. Jubal Early began an invasion of Washington, DC. They turned back the next day. 1914, Babe Ruth debuted in the major leagues with the Boston Red Sox. 1918, Enrico Caruso recorded "Over There" written by George M. Cohan. 1934, The first appointments to the newly created Federal Communications Commission were made. 1934, U.S. President Franklin Delano Roosevelt became the first American chief executive to travel through the Panama Canal while in office. 1955, The U.S. Air Force Academy was dedicated in Colorado at Lowry Air Base. 1960, In Honolulu, HI, the first tournament held outside the continental U.S., sanctioned by the U.S. Golf Association, began. 1962, The first transatlantic TV transmission was sent through the Telstar I satellite. 1972, U.S. forces broke the 95-day siege at An Loc in Vietnam. 1977, The Medal of Freedom was awarded posthumously to Rev. Martin Luther King Jr. in a White House ceremony. 1979, The abandoned U.S. space station Skylab returned to Earth. It burned up in the atmosphere and showered debris over the Indian Ocean and Australia. 1985, Dr. H. Harlan Stone announced that he had used zippers for stitches on 28 patients. The zippers were used when he thought he may have to re-operate. 1985, Nolan Ryan (Houston Astros) became the first major league pitcher to earn 4,000 strikeouts in a career. 1995, Full diplomatic relations were established between the United States and Vietnam. 1998, U.S. Air Force Lt. Michael Blassie, a casualty of the Vietnam War, was laid to rest near his Missouri home. He had been positively identified from his remains that had been enshrined in the Tomb of the Unknowns in Arlington, VA. 1999, A U.S. Air Force jet flew over the Antarctic and dropped off emergency medical supplies for Dr. Jerri Nelson after she had discovered a lump in her breast. Nelso was at the Amundsen-Scott South Pole Research Center. 2000, The video "Jaws," the Anniversary Collector's Edition, was released. 2000, Liam Neeson broke his pelvis after hitting a deer with his Harley Davidson motorcycle. 2023, Do smiled. 
 

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