Good Morning, Do! Today is Saturday, July 24 ___________________________________________________ If you can spare a coin, PLEASE hit PayPal with it! ___________________________________________________  32-year-old woman charged for killing 73-year-old man in Coarsegold  ___________________________________________________ Today, July 24 in 1987 Hulda Crooks, at 91 years of age, climbed Mt. Fuji. Hulda became the oldest person to climb Japans highest peak. ____________________________________________________ You couldn't prove the White House staff sane beyond a reasonable doubt. Ed Meese (1931 - ) The mystery of government is not how Washington works but how to make it stop. --- P. J. O'Rourke (1947 - ) ____________________________________________________ Jill was selling tickets at the movie house when I got a phone call. This woman said, "How much is a ticket?" Jill said, "Four dollars." She said, "How much for children?" Jill said, "Same price, four dollars per seat." She said, "The airlines charge half fare for children." Jill said, "OK, put the kids on a plane to somewhere, and you come to the movie. You'll enjoy it a lot more that way." ____________________________________________________   Jeanne ____________________________________________________ Having lost weight over the past few years, a lady was discarding things from her wardrobe that no longer fit. Her seven-year-old niece was watching as she held up a huge pair of slacks. "Wow," the lady said, "I must have worn these when I was 185." Her niece looked puzzled, then asked, "How old are you now?" ____________________________________________________ Reported by Rock An INTERNATIONAL BONEHEAD AWARD has been earned by  Trisha Lynn Richardson, Coarsegold, California, USA  32-year-old woman charged for killing 73-year-old man in Coarsegold  A woman has been arrested for the murder of a 73-year-old man in the Coarsegold area over the weekend. Michael Miller was found shot to death Sunday morning at Wells and Douglas roads. The Madera County Sheriff's Office initially detained 32-year- old Trisha Lynn Richardson as a person of interest in the case. On Monday afternoon, they said she admitted to having a romantic relationship with Miller and confessed to killing him. Richardson was arrested and booked into the Madera County jail on charges of first-degree murder and interfering with an officer. Her bail is set at more than $1 million.  
 DearWebby's tech support pits From: Malcolm Re: Does Mailwasher harvest your traffic? Dear Webby I have to be careful about who harvests my traffic. Does your mailwasher harvest and track your adresses? Malcolm  Dear Malcolm It tracks spams and puts them into it's database. It totally ignores legitimate mails. In time, it getsmore and more precise in recognizing your typical spam and scam. If you make filters to catch spammers or scammers, it tracks how often they grab and fry something, and show you nice and colorful pie charts about which ones were most effective. However, it does not tell anybody about who has spammed you or who has mailed you. The data would be totally overwhelming. Don't worry about it. Have FUN! DearWebby 
 For months he had been her devoted admirer. Now, at long last, he had collected up sufficient courage to ask her the most momentous of all questions. "There are quite a lot of advantages to being a bachelor," he began, "but there comes a time when one longs for the companionship of another being...a being who will regard one as perfect, as an idol; who will be kind and faithful when times are hard; who will share one's joys and sorrows..." To his delight he saw a sympathetic gleam in her eyes as she nodded in agreement. She replied,"Yes, I agree, I think it would be a great idea, and I'll gladly help you find a nice puppydog for a pet." 
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 Two gentlemen were discussing the prospects of "looming" retirement. While one guy had lots of hobbies, the other fellow had no hobbies, and was rather concerned about being set loose with nothing to do. The first guy suggested his friend go visit his kids. The man said, "Well, I only have two kids, but I could buy a motor home and go visit my brothers and sisters, that would take about a year." The first guy looked a bit puzzled, so his friend said, "I'm one of eighteen kids in my family." The first fellow's eyes got rather large, contemplating eighteen children, so the man volunteered to explain. "You see, my mother was hard of hearing. My Mom & Dad would go to bed at night, and my Dad would ask, 'Do you want to go to sleep, or what?' and my Mom would say, "What?" ____________________________________________ An anthropologist was assigned to Borneo, where he found a guide with a canoe to take him up the river to the remote site he where he would make his collections. At noon on the second day of travel up the river they began to hear drums. "What are those drums?" asked the anthropologist, knowing he was in cannibal country. The guide turned to him and said "No worry. Drums OK, but very bad when they stop." They both went ghostly pale when the drums suddenly stopped. The guide crouched in the belly of the canoe and covered his ears. "Do as I do! Very important!" hissed the guide with great urgency. "Why? What does this mean?" asked the panicked anthropologist. In a terrified whisper the native replied: "Drums stop! Next come violin solo!" ____________________________________________ The old perfesser was shopping the other day and wound up face to face with this drop dead gorgeous young lady. Talk about *built*. He couldn't help but just stare at her, so much so that his mouth dropped open and he was almost drooling. The lady caught him staring and suspected he wasn't just admiring her shopping bag. "So, old man," she said, "are you often troubled by indecent thoughts?" The old perfesser smiled and replied, "No, ma'am. Actually, to be honest, I rather enjoy them." ______________________________________________ 
 Ophelia Dingbatter's NewsNo sermon and not suitable for church, just jokes and fun for grownups. Read it on-line or subscribe. If you subscribe, look for the double opt-in confirmation request. 
 ___________________________________________________  
 Today, July 24, in 1847 Mormon leader Brigham Young and his followers arrived in the valley of the Great Salt Lake in present-day Utah. 1847 Richard M. Hoe patented the rotary-type printing press. 1866 Tennessee became the first state to be readmitted to the Union after the U.S. Civil War. 1923 The Treaty of Lausanne, which settled the boundaries of modern Turkey, was concluded in Switzerland. 1929 U.S. President Hoover proclaimed the Kellogg-Briand Pact, which renounced war as an instrument of foreign policy. 1948 Soviet occupation forces in Germany blockaded West Berlin. The U.S.-British airlift began the following day. 1969 The Apollo 11 astronauts splashed down safely in the Pacific Ocean. 1974 The U.S. Supreme Court unanimously ruled that President Nixon had to turn over subpoenaed White House tape recordings to the Watergate special prosecutor. 1985 Walt Disney released their 25th full-length cartoon. The work was "The Black Cauldron." 1987 Hulda Crooks, at 91 years of age, climbed Mt. Fuji. Hulda became the oldest person to climb Japans highest peak. 2021 Do smiled. 
 
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