Good Morning, Do! Today is Wednesday, July 8 Correction sent in by Jaqui Elizabeth Ann Seton becomes first American-born saint. Elizabeth Ann Seton is canonized by Pope Paul VI at the Vatican in Rome, becoming the first American-born Catholic saint. Born in New York City in 1774, Elizabeth Bayley was the daughter of an Episcopalian physician. --------------- I grew up believing that Disney was the epitome and good example of capitalism. Now I read that Disney is dealing with the evil Anti-American kneeler. Boycott Disney! ___________________________________________________ Today, July 8 in 1881 Edward Berner, druggist in Two Rivers, WI, poured chocolate syrup on ice cream in a dish. Before that chocolate syrup had only been used for making ice-cream sodas.1881 Edward Berner, druggist in Two Rivers, WI, poured chocolate syrup on ice cream in a dish. Before that chocolate syrup had only been used for making ice-cream sodas. _____________________________________________________ Today's Bonehead Award: Fresno boy distracts home invader for 40 minutes to keep his little sister safe, invader got arrested. ______________________________________________________ If you can help with the cost of the Humor Letter, please donate what you can! | If you like my work, Please donate a dollar, or two, if you can afford it! Please, help me stay online! | _____________________________________________________ When buying and selling are controlled by legislation, the first things to be bought and sold are legislators. --- P. J. O'Rourke (1947 - ) _____________________________________________________ Classic from 30 years ago: One of Microsoft Network's finest support techs was drafted into the Army and sent to boot camp. At the rifle range, he was given some instructions, handed a rifle, and a couple of ammo clips. He loaded the rifle and fired several shots at the target which was fifty yards away. The report came from the target area that all of his attempts had completely missed the target. The tech looked at his rifle, and then at the target. He looked at the rifle again, and then once more at the target. He placed his finger over the end of the barrel and squeezed the trigger with his other hand. The end of his finger was blown off -- whereupon he yelled toward the target area: "It's leaving here just fine; the trouble must be at your end!" _____________________________________________________ Phi Kiem, Calgary ___________________________________________________ Abe's son arrived home from school puffing and panting, sweat rolling down his face. "Dad, you'll be so proud of me," he said, "I saved a dollar by running behind the bus all the way home!" "Oy Vey!" said Abe, "You could have run behind a taxi and saved $20.00!" ___________________________________________________ An INTERNATIONAL BONEHEAD AWARD has been earned by Steven Vega, 23, Fresno, California, USA Fresno boy distracts home invader for 40 minutes to keep his little sister safe, invader got arrested. The Fresno County Sheriff's Office has arrested a man who broke into a home, intimidated a 15-year-old boy inside, stole property and a car, and fled on Wednesday. 23-year-old Steven Vega of Fresno is now in custody on charges of home invasion robbery, kidnapping, auto theft, possession of stolen property, and looting. Vega is also currently on parole for being convicted of a previous home invasion robbery. The boy and his 13-year-old sister were inside their home near E. Butler and S. Clovis Avenues in Fresno when Vega broke in. Only the boy saw Vega. For the next tense 40 minutes, the teenager tried to stay calm and keep Vega away from his little sister's room by trying to deescalate the situation. He led Vega into a room where he could load up a bag with whatever he wanted, which he did. Then the boy warmed up a frozen burrito and gave it to Vega to eat, while trying to divert Vega's attention away from the other bedrooms. She did not know a stranger was in the house and her brother didn't want her to get scared, according to the Fresno County Sheriff's Office. Vega finally took the keys to a gray 2019 Chevy Camaro parked in the driveway and drove off in it. The teen took his sister and went to a neighbor's house to explain what happened and a call was made to the Sheriff's Office. On Thursday morning, detectives tracked Vega and the stolen car to an orchard and arrested him. All the stolen items were found inside the car, and have been returned to the owners. Property crimes detectives with the Fresno County Sheriffs Office have arrested 23 year old Steven Vega of Fresno. He has been booked into the Fresno County Jail on charges of home invasion robbery, kidnapping, auto theft, possession of stolen property and looting. Vega is also currently on parole for being convicted of a previous home invasion robbery. His bail is set at $90,000. DearWebby's Tech Support Pits From: Jaye Re: Javascript DearWebby, So nice to read your letter everyday...I have learned so much from your web pages...Now I seemed to have deleted my Java script when I was updating. I all of a sudden hit the no keep button...I tried to get it back but there are so many downloads I was afraid to download one. How do i get it back since it runs so many programs. Thanks for your help if at all possible. Jaye Dear Jaye There are actually very few sites that still require Javascript. If one needs it, it will tell you. Until then, don't worry about it. Personally, I totally ignore requests to update java or java scripts, and have for years. So far that has not stopped me from legitimate sites. Next time a site claims that you need that, tell me and I will check it out. I Malwarebytes blocks it, I will tell you. Have FUN! DearWebby If you can help with the cost of the Humor Letter, please donate what you can! | If you like my work, Please donate a dollar, or two, if you can afford it! Please, help me stay online! | _____________________________________________ Stumpy prepared a pasta dish for a dinner party he was giving. In his haste, however, he forgot to refrigerate the spaghetti sauce, and it sat on the counter all day. He was worried about spoilage, but it was too late to cook up another batch. He called the local Poison Control Center and voiced his concern. They advised Stumpy to boil the sauce again. That night, the phone rang during dinner, and a guest volunteered to answer it. Stumpy's face dropped as the guest called out, "It's the Poison Control Center. They want to know how the spaghetti sauce turned out." _____________________________________________ A little girl was observed by her pastor standing outside the pre-school Sunday School classroom between Sunday School and worship, waiting for her parents to come and pick her up for "big church." The pastor noticed that she clutched a big storybook under her arms with the obvious title, "Jonah and the Whale." Feeling a little pernicious, he knelt down beside the little girl and began a conversation. "What's that you have in your hand?", he asked. "This is my storybook about Jonah and the Whale," she answered. "Tell me something, little girl," he continued, "do you believe that story about Jonah and that whale to be the truth?" The little girl implored, "Why of course I believe this story to be the truth!" He inquired further, "You really believe that a man can be swallowed up by a big whale, stay inside him all that time, and come out of there still alive and OK? You really believe all that can be true?" She declared, "Absolutely, this story is in the Bible and we studied about it in Sunday School today!" Then the pastor asked, "Well, little girl, can you prove to me that this story is the truth?" She thought for a moment and then said, "Well, when I get to Heaven, I'll ask Jonah." The pastor then asked, "Well, what if Jonah's not in Heaven?" She then put her hands on her little hips and sternly declared, "Then YOU can ask him!" ---------------- I have been in a whale. When I was in grade 3 a stuffed whale, carried on a train of about a dozen trailers was pulled into our village. Each class was herded over to the market Place, where they were parked and sent, one by one, into the mouth of the whale and eventually crawling out through the gills. SCARY!!!! So, yes, I have no problem believing the story of Jonah and the whale. ____________________________________________ A young couple drove several miles down a country road, not saying a word. An earlier discussion had led to an argument, and neither wanted to concede their position. As they passed a barnyard of mules and pigs, the husband sarcastically asked, "Are they relatives of yours?" "Yes," his wife replied. "I married into the family." Ophelia Dingbatter's NewsNo sermon and not suitable for church, just jokes and fun for grownups. Read it on-line or subscribe. If you subscribe, look for the double opt-in confirmation request. | ___________________________________________________ Today July 8 in 1099 Christian soldiers on the First Crusade march around in Jerusalem. 1608 The first French settlement at Quebec was established by Samuel de Champlain. 1663 King Charles II of England granted a charter to Rhode Island. 1693 Uniforms for police in New York City were authorized. 1709 Peter the Great defeated Charles XII at Poltava, in the Ukraine, The Swedish empire was effectively ended. 1755 Britain broke off diplomatic relations with France as their disputes in the New World intensified. 1776 Col. John Nixon gave the first public reading of the U.S. Declaration of Independence to a crowd at Independence Square in Philadelphia. 1794 French troops captured Brussels, Belgium. 1795 Kent County Free School changed its name to Washington College. It was the first college to be named after U.S. President George Washington. The school was established by an act of the Maryland Assembly in 1723. 1815 Louis XVIII returned to Paris after the defeat of Napoleon. 1865 C.E. Barnes patented the machine gun. 1879 The first ship to use electric lights departed from San Francisco, CA. 1881 Edward Berner, druggist in Two Rivers, WI, poured chocolate syrup on ice cream in a dish. Before that chocolate syrup had only been used for making ice-cream sodas. 1889 The Wall Street Journal was first published. 1889 John L. Sullivan defeated Jake Kilrain, in the last championship bare-knuckle fight. The fight lasted 75 rounds. 1907 Florenz Ziegfeld staged his first "Follies" on the roof of the New York Theater in New York City. 1919 U.S. President Wilson returned from the Versailles "Peace" Conference in France. 1950 General Douglas MacArthur was named commander-in- chief of United Nations forces in Korea. 1960 The Soviet Union charged Gary Powers with espionage. He was shot down in a U-2 spy plane. 1963 All Cuban-owned assets in the United States were frozen in retaliation for Cuba nationalizing US assets. 1969 The U.S. Patent Office issued a patent for the game "Twister." 1981 The Solar Challenger became the frist solar-powered airplane to cross the English Channel. 1986 Kurt Waldheim was inaugurated as president of Austria despite controversy over his alleged ties to Nazi war crimes. 1997 The Mayo Clinic and the U.S. government warned that the diet-drug combination known as "fen-phen" could cause serious heart and lung damage. 1997 NATO invited Poland, Hungary, and the Czech Republic to join the alliance in 1999. 2000 J.K. Rowling's "Harry Potter and the Goblet of Fire" was released in the U.S. It was the fourth Harry Potter book. 2010 The Solar Impulse completed the first 24-hour flight by a solar powered plane. 2020 Do smiled. |
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