Dear Webby's Humor Letter
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 Good Morning, Do! Today is Friday, November 9 Time to wear a bit of red to show your support for the troops!  Here is a domain name you can use! 4mylove.com You can buy that domain name for $50 Have FUN! Dearwebby Today's Bonehead Award:   Feds charge serial bank robbery suspect in Madison Heights, other robberies  ______________________________________________________ Today, November 9 in 1911 George Claude of Paris, France, applied for a patent on neon advertising signs. More of today in history at History ______________________________________________________ 
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The aging process has you firmly in its grasp if you never get the urge to throw a snowball. --- Doug Larson ______________________________________________________ As a young married couple, a husband and a wife lived in a cheap housing complex near the base where he was working. Their chief complaint was that the walls were paper-thin and that they had no privacy. This was painfully obvious when one morning the husband was upstairs and the wife was downstairs on the telephone. She was interrupted by the doorbell and went to greet her neighbor. "Give this to your husband," he said thrusting a roll of toilet paper into her hands. "He's been yelling for it for 15 minutes!" ________________________________________________ If you like the Humor Letter, please vote! ______________________________________________________ On duty as a customer-service rep for a car-rental company, I took a call from a driver who needed a tow. He was stranded on a busy highway, but he didn't know the make of the car he was driving. I asked again for a more detailed description beyond a "blue, four-door sedan." "It's the one on fire," he replied. _____________________________________________________ Malwarebytes for Home | Anti-Malware Premium | Free Trial Download ______________________________________________________ >From Kathy "My ten year old daughter asked me what a colon was and I explained that it was a part of the body that food goes through before being eliminated. Then she asked me what a semicolon was and I told her that it was a colon the size of a truck with eighteen wheels." ______________________________________________________ Revenge will be in your shoes! _____________________________________________________
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___________________________________________________ An INTERNATIONAL BONEHEAD AWARD has been earned by Dajanae Jordan, 23. Grosse Pointe Park, Madison Heights, Michigan Feds charge serial bank robbery suspect in Madison Heights, other robberies A woman accused in a string of bank robberies in Madison Heights and other cities has been named and arraigned in federal court. Police said Dajanae Jordan, 23, of Grosse Pointe Park was charged on bank robbery and attempted bank robbery counts Friday in U.S. District Court in Detroit. We're not charging her locally, said Madison Heights Detective Sgt. Brent LeMerise. The case has been turned over to the feds. Jordan faced a detention hearing Monday afternoon in federal court where her bail will be set. The robberies and attempted robberies first started a couple of weeks ago in Macomb County when authorities said Jordan unsuccessfully tried to rob a Chase Bank in Warren. Jordan used notes that she handed to tellers at all the banks where the robberies and attempted robberies were done, according to police in Oakland and Macomb counties. Other banks included in the string of robberies included an unsuccessful attempt at Vibe Credit Union in Sterling Heights. But police said she was successful in robberies at a Comerica Bank in Macomb Township, a Flagstar Bank on Big Beaver in Troy and a Chase Bank in Madison Heights. The Chase Bank in Madison Heights is located in the Hollywood Market on Campbell Road near 12 Mile and was robbed Oct. 25. Madison Heights police said she handed a male teller a note and threatened to shoot him if he didn't hurry up and she got away with $2,500. Multiple police departments and the FBI were part of the ongoing investigation of the robberies and attempted robberies. They hadn't identified a suspect until police said Jordan returned to the bank in Madison Heights and unsuccessfully tried to rob it again on Halloween. Residents called police and reported a woman matching the suspect's description was running through their yards in a neighborhood near the bank. One of them also saw a car matching the description of a silver car used in the earlier bank robbery. Police said a man in a burgundy Jeep picked up the suspect. Hazel Park police spotted the Jeep heading south on Interstate 75 near Eight Mile Road and finally stopped the vehicle in Detroit. The man driving the Jeep has not been charged and reportedly told police he didn't know Jordan had robbed a bank when he picked her up. From: Joan-Mary Re: Letter not showing Dear Webby The Humor Letter is came through as a blank and only when I hit reply to advise this, did I get to see the column. Respectfully, Joan-Mary
Dear Joan-Mary It did arrive and download OK, otherwise hitting Reply later would not have made a difference, and it showed OK for all other subscribers. Check the settings in your email program. If you tell me which email program you use, I can investigate further. Have FUN! DearWebby
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From a passenger ship one can just barely see a bearded man on a small island in the distance who is shouting and desperately waving his hands. "Who is that?" a passenger asked a passing steward. "I've no idea. Every year when we pass by, he goes nuts."
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A rancher goes to the bank to borrow money to buy a bull so he can increase his stock. The transaction is made and the banker who lent the money comes by a week later to see how his investment is doing. The farmer complains that the bull just eats grass and won't even look at the cows. The banker suggests that a veterinarian have a look at the bull. The next week the banker returns to see if the vet helped. The farmer looks very pleased: "The bull has taken care of all my cows, broke through the fence, and has even serviced all my neighbor's cows!" "Wow," says the banker, "what did the vet do to that bull?" "Just gave him some pills," replied the farmer. "What kind of pills?" asked the banker. "I don't know, but they sort of taste like peppermint." ___________________________________________________ Daily tip from Thriftyfun.com Thriftyfun.com Breaking Up a Dog Fight The best way to break up a dog fight is to throw water on the dogs. This will usually startle the dogs enough to stop the fighting. Breaking up a dog fight with your hands can be very dangerous as you are liable to get bit or scratched. In winter, when thawed out water may be hard to come by, gonging them with an empty plastic 5 gallon pail usually gets their attention, especially if it is the same pail that you use to feed them. It may look cruel, but is a lot better than letting them kill or injure each other. DearWebby Tip provided by Thriftyfun.com ____________________________________________________
15 secretive places you can now see on Google Earth.
___________________________________________________ >From Merlin All my relatives know that I refold the wrapping paper from my Christmas presents for reuse later. "Auntie," asked one of my young nieces, "why do you save all that paper?" "I'm doing what's best for the environment," I replied. "So I'm recycling." "Good thing you didn't ask that question five years ago," my daughter interrupted. "Then she was just plain cheap." ___________________________________________________
Ophelia Dingbatter's NewsNo sermon and not suitable for church, just jokes and fun for grownups. Read it on-line or subscribe. If you subscribe, look for the double opt-in confirmation request.
Seen on a bumper sticker: A Lesbian is a mannish depressive with delusions of gender.
 Today November 9 in 1857 The "Atlantic Monthly" first appeared on newsstands and featured the first installment of "The Autocrat of the Breakfast Table" by Oliver Wendell Holmes. 1872 A fire destroyed about 800 buildings in Boston, MA. 1906 U.S. President Theodore Roosevelt left for Panama to see the progress on the new canal. It was the first foreign trip by a U.S. president. 1911 George Claude of Paris, France, applied for a patent on neon advertising signs. 1918 Germany's Kaiser Wilhelm II announced he would abdicate. He then fled to the Netherlands. 1923 In Munich, the Beer Hall Putsch was crushed by German troops that were loyal to the democratic government. The event began the evening before when Adolf Hitler took control of a beer hall full of Bavarian government leaders at gunpoint. 1935 United Mine Workers president John L. Lewis and other labor leaders formed the Committee for Industrial Organization. 1938 Nazi troops and sympathizers destroyed and looted 7,500 Jewish businesses, burned 267 synagogues, killed 91 Jews, and rounded up over 25,000 Jewish men in an event that became known as Kristallnacht or "Night of Broken Glass." 1953 The U.S. Supreme Court upheld a 1922 ruling that major league baseball did not come within the scope of federal antitrust laws. 1961 Major Robert White flew an X-15 rocket plane at a world record speed of 4,093 mph. 1961 The Professional Golfer's Association (PGA) eliminated its "caucasians only" rule. 1963 In Japan, about 450 miners were killed in a coal-dust explosion. 1963 In Japan, 160 people died in a train crash. 1965 The great Northeast blackout occurred as several states and parts of Canada were hit by a series of power failures lasting up to 13 1/2 hours. 1967 A Saturn V rocket carrying an unmanned Apollo spacecraft blasted off from Cape Kennedy on a successful test flight. 1976 The U.N. General Assembly approved ten resolutions condemning the apartheid government in South Africa. 1979 The United Nations Security Council unanimously called upon Iran to release all American hostages "without delay." Militants, mostly students had taken 63 Americans hostage at the U.S. embassy in Tehran, Iran, on November 4. 1981 U.S. troops began arriving in Egypt for a three-week Rapid Deployment Force excercise. Somalia, Sudan and Oman were also involved in the operation. 1981 The Internation Monetary Fund approved a $5.8 billion loan to India. It was the highest loan to date. 1982 Sugar Ray Leonard retired from boxing. In 1984 Leonard came out of retirement to fight one more time before becoming a boxing commentator for NBC. 1984 A bronze statue titled "Three Servicemen," by Frederick Hart, was unveiled at the site of the Vietnam Veterans Memorial in Washington, DC. 1989 Communist East Germany opened its borders, allowing its citizens to travel freely to West Germany. 1990 Soviet President Mikhail S. Gorbachev signed a non- aggression treaty with Germany. 1992 Russian President Boris Yeltsin, visiting London, appealed for assistance in rescheduling his country's debt, and asked British businesses to invest. 1998 A federal judge in New York approved the richest antitrust settlement in U.S. history. A leading brokerage firm was ordered to pay $1.03 billion to investors who had sued over price-rigging of Nasdaq stocks. 2004 U.S. First Lady Laura Bush officially reopened Pennsylvania Avenue in front of the White House to pedestrians. 2018 Do smiled. 

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