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___________________________________________________ History: on this day, October 29, in 1940, The first peacetime military draft began in the U.S. to get ready for WWII. ____________________________________________________ Bonehead Award goes to Arizona Dems accused Kari Lake for a break-in into Dem Headqurter. Arrested Burglar is a Democrat ____________________________________________________ We can lick gravity, but sometimes the paperwork is overwhelming. --- Wernher von Braun (1912 - 1977) ___________________________________________________ Teacher: If I had seven oranges in one hand and eight oranges in the other, what would I have? Pedro: BEEEEEEEG hands! _____________________________________________________ In a recent survey, 60 percent of respondents said the cities where they live is noisier now than they were five years ago. The other 40 percent didn't hear the question. __________________________________________________ Reported by Rock: An International Bonehead Award has been earned by  Daniel Mota Dos Reis, 36, Phoenix, Arizona, USA Immigrant from Angola, selfprofessed Democrat, with a reputationon the street of being nuts. Lies: Dems Blamed HQ Break-In on Kari Lake, But We Found Crook's Facebook Page, he is a Democrat A self-professed Democrat has been arrested after an alleged break-in of the Arizona Democratic gubernatorial candidates campaign headquarters. Katie Hobbs previously cast blame on her Republican opponent when announcing the crime. Hobbs took aim at Kari Lake for inciting threats and spreading dangerous disinformation in a Thursday statement regarding the campaign office crime. The break-in allegedly took place earlier this week. The Arizona Democratic Party was even more explicit in blaming Republicans for the alleged burglary, taking aim at fringe Republicans for the act. However, an arrest in the case appears to debunk any notion of a Republican operative targeting Hobbs. Police have apprehended 36-year-old Daniel Mota Dos Reis in the case, a man who identifies as a Democrat on his Facebook page. Arrestee in break-in of Katie Hobbs campaign office has been identified. Charged with assault, pro-mask, immigrant from Angola. _____________________________________________________  ___________________________________________________ Thanks to Lynn for these "Daffynitions" Abdicate (v.), to give up all hope of ever having a flat stomach Balderdash (n.), a rapidly receding hairline. Circumvent (n.), the opening in the front of boxer shorts. Esplanade (v.), to attempt an explanation while drunk. Flabbergasted (adj.), appalled over how much weight you have gained. Negligent (adj.), describes a condition in which you absentmindedly answer the door in your nightie. ___________________________________________________ If you can spare a coin, PLEASE hit PayPal with it! ___________________________________________________  From Laura _________________________________________________ This is a story about four people named: Everybody, Somebody, Anybody, and Nobody. There was an important job to be done and Everybody was asked to do it. Everybody was sure Somebody would do it. Anybody could have done it, but Nobody did it. Somebody got angry about that, because it was Everybody's job. Everybody thought Anybody could do it but Nobody realized that Everybody wouldn't do it! It ended up that Everybody blamed Somebody when Nobody did what Anybody could have done! ____________________________________________________ >From Liz After directory assistance gave me my boyfriend's new telephone number, I dialed him -- and got a woman. "Is Mike there?" I asked confused. "Umm, he's in the shower," she responded. "Please tell him his girlfriend called," I said and hung up. When he didn't return the call, I dialed again. This time a man answered. "This is Mike," he said. "You're not my boyfriend!" I exclaimed. "I know," he replied. "That's what I've been trying to tell my wife for the past half-hour." ================================================= DearWebby's Tech Support Pits From:Brad Re: No file extensions Dear Webby I have a problem telling different files apart because I usually give them the same name if they belong to the same project. At one time they used to have different last names after the decimal point, but with the current version of Windows those are gone and I can't tell if a file is a picture or the text describing it. Help! Brad Dear Brad In the File Explorer click on Organize, Layout, Folder Options, View. Take the checkmark off "Hide extensions for known file types" Hit Apply, and the extensions will show again. Have FUN DearWebby _____________________________________________________ MILITARY WISDOM "A slipping gear could let your M203 grenade launcher fire when you least expect it. That would make you quite unpopular in what's left of your unit."-Army's magazine of preventive maintenance. "Aim towards the Enemy."-Instruction printed on US Rocket Launcher "When the pin is pulled, Mr. Grenade is not our friend. -U.S. Marine Corps "Cluster bombing from B-52s is very, very accurate. The bombs are guaranteed to always hit the ground." -U.S.A.F. Ammo Troop "If the enemy is in range, so are you."-Infantry Journal "It is generally inadvisable to eject directly over the area you just bombed."-U.S. Air Force Manual "Whoever said the pen is mightier than the sword obviously never encountered automatic weapons."-Gen.Mac Arthur "Try to look unimportant; they may be low on ammo."-Infantry Journal "You, you, and you . . . Panic. The rest of you, come with me." -U.S. Marine Corp Gunnery Sgt. "Tracers work both ways."-U.S. Army Ordnance "Five second fuses only last three seconds."-Infantry Journal "Don't ever be the first, don't ever be the last, and don't ever volunteer to do anything."-U. S Navy Swabbie "Bravery is being the only one who knows you're afraid."-David Hackworth "If your attack is going too well, you're walking into an ambush."-Infantry Journal "No combat ready unit has ever passed inspection." -Joe Gay "Any ship can be a minesweeper... once." -Anon "Never tell the Platoon Sergeant you have nothing to do." -Unknown Marine Recruit "Don't draw fire; it irritates the people around you." -Your Buddies "If you see a bomb technician running, follow him." -U.S.A.F. Ammo Troop _____________________________________________________ Ophelia Dingbatter's News no sermon and not suitable for church, just jokes and fun for grownups. Read it on-line or subscribe. If you subscribe, look for the double opt- in confirmation request. ____________________________________________________ Today, October 29, in 1618, Sir Walter Raleigh was beheaded under a sentence that had been brought against him 15 years earlier for conspiracy against King James I. 1652, The Massachusetts Bay Colony proclaimed itself to be an independent commonwealth. 1682, William Penn landed at what is now Chester, PA. He was the founder of Pennsylvania. 1863, The International Committee of the Red Cross was founded. 1901, Leon Czolgosz, the assassin of U.S. President McKinley, was electrocuted. 1923, Turkey formally became a republic after the dissolution of the Ottoman Empire. The first president was Mustafa Kemal, later known as Kemal Ataturk. 1929, America's Great Depression began with the crash of the Wall Street stock market. 1940, The first peacetime military draft began in the U.S. to get ready for WWII. 1945, The first ballpoint pens to be made commercially went on sale at Gimbels Department Store in New York at the price of $12.50 each. 1956, Israel invaded Egypt's Sinai Peninsula during the Suez Canal Crisis. 1959, General Mills became the first corporation to use close-circuit television. 1960, Muhammad Ali (Cassius Clay) won his first professional fight. 1966, The National Organization for Women was founded. 1969, The U.S. Supreme Court ordered an immediate end to all school segregation. 1973, O.J. Simpson, of the Buffalo Bills, set two NFL records. He carried the ball 39 times and he ran 157 yards putting him over 1,000 yards at the seventh game of the season. 1974, U.S. President Gerald Ford signed a new law forbidding discrimination in credit applications on the basis of sex or marital status 1985, It was announced that Maj. Gen. Samuel K. Doe had won the first multiparty election in Liberia. 1990, The U.N. Security Council voted to hold Saddam Hussein's regime liable for human rights abuses and war damages during its occupation of Kuwait. 1991, The U.S. Galileo spacecraft became the first to visit an asteroid (Gaspra). 1991, Trade sanctions were imposed on Haiti by the U.S. to pressure the new leaders to restore the ousted President Jean-Bertrand Aristide to power. 1992, Depo Provera, a contraceptive, was approved by the Food and Drug Administration. 2022 Do smiled.
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