| Good Morning, Do! Today is Friday, July 21 Time to wear a bit of red to show your support for the troops! ____________________________________________________ History: today, July 20 in 2011, In Florida, Space Shuttle Atlantis landed successfully at Kennedy Space Center after completing STS-135. It was the final flight of NASA's space shuttle program. ___________________________________________________ Bonehead Baby boy taken from Phoenix hospital found safe, mother in custody ___________________________________________________ Q Few things are more satisfying than seeing your own children have teenagers of their own. --- Doug Larson Turn the world over on its side and everything loose will land in Los Angeles. --- Frank Lloyd Wright (1869 - 1959) ___________________________________________________ If you can spare a coin, PLEASE hit PayPal with it! ___________________________________________________ Greg: Why did you sell that brand new pressure cooker at your yard sale? Sam: It may look like a pressure cooker to you, but in the hands of my wife, it's a secret weapon. Last Wednesday, she shot a pot roast into outer space! ___________________________________________________ Now this is pure genius. Germans who gave us the world Kindergarten may now give us the world Maennergarten - a sort of Kindergarten for men - as a service to women who want to shop. For about $15, Maenner- garten provides men with two beers, a hot meal, sports on television and games to play - like a remote car or a race track, Britain's Sky News reports. "The women are issued a receipt for their partners when they hand them in and can pick them up again when they return it to us later," says Alexander Stein, manager of a Maennergarten. According to Stein, the idea came from a female customer who was too stressed shopping with her husband and wanted a way she could shop in peace. ___________________________________________________ Nancy Reagan tells the story of how President Ronald Reagan was once challenged by a college student who said it was impossible for Reagan's generation to understand his. "You grew up in a different world," the student said. Today we have television, jet planes, space travel, nuclear energy, computers..." Taking advantage or a pause in the student's litany, Reagan said, "You're right. We didn't have those things when we were young. We invented them." ___________________________________________________ ___________________________________________________ In Washington, a pair of crooks recently robbed a Starbucks restaurant. They didn't find enough money in the safe, so they proceeded to work the drive-thru window for half an hour. They sold 10 lattes, five cappuccinos -- and made $26,000." --- Jay Leno ________________________________________________ A Bonehead award has been reported by Rock Rosa Santana, 24, Phoenix, Arizona, USA Baby boy taken from Phoenix hospital found safe, mother in custody A 5-day-old infant boy with an attached feeding tube who was allegedly taken by his mother from a Phoenix hospital on July 12 has been found safe. The Arizona Department of Public Safety says 24-year-old Rosa Santana had been seen leaving Valleywise Medical Health Center, located at 2601 E. Roosevelt Street, with her newborn baby in a duffel bag. Police say that the baby was receiving lifesaving treatment when Santana took him against medical advice. "The newborn victim was actively receiving medical treatment at the hospital and without it, the victims condition could be life threatening," said Sgt. Brian Bower with Phoenix Police. Investigators eventually found the two at an apartment near 71st Avenue and Indian School Road on Wednesday night. They say Santana was unconscious on a bed with paper of powder residue consistent with fentanyl, which was within reach of the baby. Santana allegedly told police she fed the baby at the apartment and once he was asleep, she used fentanyl by inhaling the powder. The baby tested positive for fentanyl and is going through drug withdrawals, police said. He has since been taken back to the hospital to continue his treatment, and Santana was booked into jail. She is accused of felony child abuse. "There was not fentanyl around my son," Rosa Santana told a judge during her initial court appearance. "I never wanted this to happen. I never tried to hurt my own son. I was trying to avoid a bunch of drama." According to court documents, the baby had fentanyl in his umbilical cord sample, indicating long-term fentanyl use by Santana, who told police she lost custody of her three other children. Santana is being held on a $10,000 cash bond. If she's released, she'll have to wear an ankle monitor and be drug tested. I hope she is sentenced to 18 years in jail! ___________________________________________________ The following is from a 1950's Home Economics textbook intended for the High School girls, teaching how to prepare for married life. 1. Have dinner ready: Plan ahead, even the night before, to have a delicious meal - on time. This is a way of letting him know that you have been thinking about him, and are concerned about his needs. Most men are hungry when they come home and the prospects of a good meal are part of the warm welcome needed. 2. Prepare yourself: Take 15 minutes to rest so you will be refreshed when he arrives. Touch up your make-up, put a ribbon in your hair and be fresh looking. He has just been with a lot of work-weary people. Be a little gay and a little more interesting. His boring day may need a lift. 3. Clear away the clutter. Make one last trip through the main part of the house just before your husband arrives, gathering up school books, toys, paper, etc. Then run a dust cloth over the tables. Your husband will feel he has reached a haven of rest and order, and it will give you a lift too. 4. Prepare the children: Take a few minutes to wash the children's hands and faces if they are small, comb their hair, and if necessary, change their clothes. They are little treasures and he would like to see them playing the part. 5. Minimize the noise: At the time of his arrival, eliminate all noise of washer, dryer, dishwasher, or vacuum. Try to encourage the children to be quiet. Be happy to see him. Greet him with a warm smile and be glad to see him. 6. Some DON'TS: Don't greet him with problems or complaints. Don't complain if he's late for dinner. Count this as minor compared with what he might have gone through that day. 7. Make him comfortable: Have him lean back in a comfortable chair or suggest he lie down in the bedroom. Have a cool or warm drink ready for him. Arrange his pillow and offer to take off his shoes. Speak in a low, soft, soothing and pleasant voice. Allow him to relax and unwind. 8. Listen to him: You may have a dozen things to tell him, but the moment of his arrival is not the time. Let him talk first. 9. Make the evening his: Never complain if he does not take you out to dinner or to other places of entertainment; instead try to understand his world of strain and pressure and his need to be home and relax. 10. The Goal: Try to make your home a place of peace and order where your husband can relax. Unfortunately, none of today's women have ever heard about that silly stuff, that might lead to 40 - 50 year marriages. ___________________________________________________ If you can spare a coin, PLEASE hit PayPal with it! ___________________________________________________ CHURCH BULLETIN BLOOPERS Head Deacon and Dead Deaconess Walters will be giving a talk on marriage. There will not be any Women Worth Watching this week. Child care provided with reservations. I was hungry and you gave me something to eat; I was thirty and you gave me something to drink. The visiting monster today is Rev. Jack Bains. The Boars of Trustees will be meeting Tuesday night at 8PM The activity will take place on the church barking lot. ___________________________________________________ If you can spare a coin, PLEASE hit PayPal with it! ___________________________________________________ ___________________________________________________ If you can spare a coin, PLEASE hit PayPal with it! __________________________________________________ DearWebby's Tech Support Pits From: Nancy Re: No Mailwasher Dear Webby I don't have your Mailwasher. It is not free. Isn't there a free alternative? Nancy Dear Nancy It is not MY mailwasher. I am just one of the first people, who actually paid for it. And no, there is no free alternative. It is too cheap to make it worth building a competitive program. Gmail has copied a lot of MailWasher, but about a quarter of it. Try that for now. Have Fun! DearWebby ______________________________________________________ Little Johnny's new baby brother was screaming up a storm. He asked his mom, "Where'd we get him?" His mother replied, "He came from heaven, Johnny." Johnny says, "WOW! I can see why they threw him out! ___________________________________________________ A country lad was being interviewed for a farm laborer's job. The boss said, "You must be fit. Have you had any illnesses?" "No Sir," said the lad. The boss asked, "Any accidents?" The boy said, "No Sir." The boss said to him, "But you walked in here on crutches. You must have had an accident!" The lad said, "Oh, no Sir! I was tossed by a bull, That was no accident. He's a mean cuss and I KNOW he did it on purpose!" __________________________________________________ If you can help with the cost of the humor letter, please donate what you can! If you like my work, please donate a dollar, or two, if you can afford it! Please, help me stay online! __________________________________________________ History Today July 21, in 1733, John Winthrop was granted the first honorary Doctor of Law Degree given by Harvard College in Cambridge, MA. 1831, Belgium became independent as Leopold I was proclaimed King of the Belgians. 1861, The first major battle of the U.S. Civil War began. It was the Battle of Bull Run at Manassas Junction, VA. The Confederates won the battle. 1925, The "Monkey Trial" ended in Dayton, TN. John T. Scopes was convicted and fined $100 for violating the state prohibition on teaching Darwin's theory of evolution. The conviction was later overturned on a legal technicality because the judge had set the fine instead of the jury. 1930, The Veterans Administration of the United States was established. 1931, CBS aired the first regularly scheduled program to be simulcast on radio and television. The show featured singer Kate Smith, composer George Gershwin and New York City Mayor Jimmy Walker. 1931, The Reno Race Track inaugurated the daily double in the U.S. 1940, Lithuania, Estonia, and Latvia were annexed by the Soviet Union. 1944, American forces landed on Guam during World War II. 1949, The U.S. Senate ratified the North Atlantic Treaty. 1954, The Geneva Conference partitioned Vietnam into North Vietnam and South Vietnam. 1957, Althea Gibson became the first black woman to win a major U.S. tennis title when she won the Womens National clay-court singles competition. 1959, A U.S. District Court judge in New York City ruled that "Lady Chatterleys Lover" was not a dirty book. 1961, Captain Virgil "Gus" Grissom became the second American to rocket into a sub-orbital pattern around the Earth. He was flying on the Liberty Bell 7. 1968, Arnold Palmer became the first golfer to make a million dollars in career earnings after he tied for second place at the PGA Championship. 1980, Draft registration began in the United States for 19 and 20-year-old men. 1987, Mary Hart, of "Entertainment Tonight", had her legs insured by Lloyds of London for $2 million. 1997, The U.S.S. Constitution, which defended the United States during the War of 1812, set sail under its own power for the first time in 116 years. 1998, Chinese gymnast Sang Lan, 17, was paralyzed after a fall while practicing for the women's vault competition at the Goodwill Games in New York. Spinal surgery 4 days later failed to restore sensation below her upper chest. 2000, NBC announced that they had found nearly all of Milton Berle's kinescopes. The filmed recordings of Berle's early TV shows had been the subject of a $30 million lawsuit filed by Berle the previous May. 2002, WorldCom Inc. filed for Chapter 11 bankruptcy protection. At the time it was the largest bankruptcy in U.S. history. 2004, White House officials were briefed on the September 11 commission's final report. The 575-page report concluded that hijackers exploited "deep institutional failings within our government." The report was released to the public the next day. 2007, The seventh and last book of the Harry Potter series, "Harry Potter and the Deathly Hallows," was released. 2011, In Florida, Space Shuttle Atlantis landed successfully at Kennedy Space Center after completing STS-135. It was the final flight of NASA's space shuttle program. 2023, Do smiled.
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