Good Morning, Do! Today is Sunday, January 22  | 1411If you like my work,
Please donate a dollar,
or two, if you can afford it!
Please, help me stay online!
 |
___________________________________________________ History: on this day, January 22, in 1666, Shah Jahan, a descendant of Genghis Khan and Timur, died at the age of 74. He was the Mongul emperor of India who built the Taj Mahal as a mausoleum for his wife Mumtaz- i-Mahal. ____________________________________________________ Bonehead Award: Venice hit-and-run driver who used stolen car to ram into mom, baby is murdered a year after much too light sentence _____________________________________________________ Q Observe your enemies, for they first find out your faults. --- Antisthenes (445 BC - 365 BC) May I never miss a sunset or a rainbow because I am looking down. --- Sara June Parker ____________________________________________________ Some people's appliances!! A Welsh woman in Llanelli, Dyfed had to call emergency services from her mobile phone when her washing machine pinned her against the sink. In a slick move, the machine, running on vibrations, slowly slid across the kitchen floor until it completed its destiny and she was pinned for the count. And what says the washing machine? It wouldn't respond to reporter's questions because it was feeling drained. The machine is not likely to repeat the behavior because it was probably just a cycle it was going through. __________________________________________________ Ed was shopping the other day and wound up face to face with this drop dead gorgeous woman. He couldn't help but just stare at her, so much so that his mouth dropped open. The woman caught him staring and suspected he wasn't just admiring her outfit. She said, "Are you often troubled by indecent thoughts?" Ed replied, "No, ma'am, not troubled at all. Actually, to be honest, I rather enjoy them." __________________________________________________ Reported by Rock An International Bonehead Award has been earned by  Darrell D. Frazier, Venice, California, USA Venice hit-and-run driver who used stolen car to ram into mom, baby is murdered a year after much too light sentence A Los Angeles-area teenager who ran over a mother walking her child in a stroller in Venice in 2021 and received just a few months of diversionary camp as punishment was gunned down in Palmdale this week, according to FOX News. Kristopher Baca, 17, of Palmdale was found fatally shot on Wednesday on a driveway in the 38600 block of 11th Street East, according to the Los Angeles County Sheriff's Department. FOX 11 had not previously identified Baca in connection with the Venice hit-and-run due to his age. He pleaded guilty in the hit-and-run case last year. The Los Angeles County Coroner-Medical Examiner's office confirmed Baca's death Friday but said the examination was still pending. At this time, there is no indication that his death is connected to the hit-and-run case, and no suspect description was available. Sources close to the investigation told FOX News that he had been at a fast food restaurant earlier trying to "get with a girl." Surveillance video shows a dark sedan vehicle striking woman walking her child in a stroller in Venice, California. The woman's legs are over her head as she flips on top of the hood of the car. Surveillance video recorded the entire Aug. 6, 2021 hit-and- run incident in Venice, California. "As he walked home alone, a car pulled up next to him and an argument broke out. Someone in the vehicle opened fire, then sped off," FOX News reported. The young mother eventually moved her family out of Los Angeles to get away from what she has described as "soft-on- crime policies." California teen who rammed car into mother and infant child was on probation at time of incident. If George Gascn actually did his job this kid would still be alive in jail. ___________________________________________________  ___________________________________________________ Swampy Marsh, the young Australian father-to-be, is waiting anxiously outside the maternity ward where his wife is having their first baby. He is pacing the floor when the nurse comes out and says, "You have a little boy, Mr. Marsh, but you had better go out and have a cup of coffee, because there may be another one." Swampy turns a little pale and leaves.Some time later he phones the hospital and is told that he is the father of twins, but the nurse cautions, "There is another on the way, so call back later." At that Swampy decides that coffee is not strong enough, so he goes to a bar and has some beer. When he phones the hospital again he is told that the third baby has arrived and a fourth is on the way. White-faced, he stumbles to the bar and orders a double scotch. Twenty minutes later, he tries to phone again, but he is so drunk that he dials the wrong number and gets the recorded cricket game score. When they pick him up off the floor the recording is still going strong: "The score is ninety-six all out," says the voice, "and the last one was a duck." ___________________________________________________ If you can spare a coin, PLEASE hit PayPal with it! ___________________________________________________  Mammillaria zeilmanianna ____________________________________________________ A married couple in New York's "Little Italy" went to their Priest to discuss birth control, since they already had five children. The husband inquired if perhaps oral sex would be an acceptable substitute in the eyes of the Church. The Priest explained that it was still considered a sin and frowned upon by the church. The wife spoke up fuming: "Look Fatha, you no play-a da game, you no make-a da rules." ____________________________________________________ The mother of three notoriously unruly youngsters was asked whether or not she'd have children if she had to do it over again. "Sure," she replied, "but not the same ones." __________________________________________________ If you can spare a coin, PLEASE hit PayPal with it! _____________________________________________________ At the beginning of a children's sermon, one girl came up to the altar wearing a beautiful dress. As the children were sitting down around the pastor, the pastor leans over and says to the girl, "That is a very pretty dress. Is it your special Easter dress? Do you wear it at other times too?" The girl replied, directly into the pastor's microphone, "Yes, it's my Easter dress, and I can wear it only once a year, 'cause Mom says all these ruffles and lace are a pain in the as* to iron." ___________________________________________________ If you can spare a coin, PLEASE hit PayPal with it! ___________________________________________________ Leesa was having several couples over for dinner, so she wanted to cook something special. She slaved for hours that afternoon and finally created a masterpiece. Salmon mousse. Just before her guests arrived, she caught her cat nibbling away at the dish on the dining room table. She had worked so hard that she couldn't throw the mousse away, so she smoothed it over and served it anyway. Well, the mousse was a hit. Everyone took seconds or thirds. Proudly she stood to bring the empty plate out to the kitchen and looked out the window. There, next to the house, lay her cat. Dead. She had to confess to her guests that she'd served mousse eaten by the cat and now the cat was dead. The entire dinner party rushed to the hospital to have their stomachs pumped. The housewife, who hadn't eaten any because she knew her cat had, lay in bed--mourning the passing of her cat and fearing that the same fate could befall her guests. Then, the phone rang. It was her next door neighbor who said, " I'm sorry about your cat. I should have told you that I ran her over but I was just so ashamed and saw that you had a dinner party in progress....So I just put her on your lawn." ____________________________________________________ As the storm raged, the captain realized his ship was sinking fast. He called out, "Anyone here know how to pray?" One man stepped forward, "Aye, Captain, I know how to pray." "Good," said the captain, "you pray while the rest of us put on our life jackets - we're one short." ____________________________________________________ DearWebby's Tech Support Pits FROM: Georgina RE: Pets setting off motion detector Dear Webby I have a motion detector in my bed room. Yeah, I know, that is pretty sad, but I have been living alone for a long time and it used to work just fine. When I stood up, the light came on. A month ago a friend gave me a puppy, who seems to delight in turning the light on by running around. I asked the security company that originally installed the motion detector switch, but they said that installing a "Pet Alley" would cost $150. That seems way too much. You used to install security systems in the 80s and 90s. Does a "Pet Alley" really cost that much? Georgina Dear Georgina I never charged extra for that. All it takes is a strip of black masking tape covering the lower part of the motion detector's "window". You can even cover the lower part of the motion detector with cardboard, wood or metal. Then it does not see the puppie nrunning around. Have FUN DearWebby _____________________________________________________ Nancy stormed up to the front desk of the library and said, "I have a complaint!" "Yes, ma'am?" "I borrowed a book last week and it was horrible!" "What was wrong with it?" "It had way too many characters and there was no plot whatsoever!" The librarian nodded and said, "Ahh. So you must be the person who took our phone book." ____________________________________________________ Today, January 22 in 1666, Shah Jahan, a descendant of Genghis Khan and Timur, died at the age of 74. He was the Mongul emperor of India that built the Taj Mahal as a mausoleum for his wife Mumtaz- i-Mahal. 1771, The Falkland Islands were ceded to Britain by Spain. 1824, The Asante army crushed British troops in the Gold Coast. 1879, James Shields began a term as a U.S. Senator from Missouri. He had previously served Illinois and Minnesota. He was the first Senator to serve three states. 1879, British troops were massacred by the Zulus at Isandhlwana. 1889, The Columbia Phonograph Company was formed in Washington, DC. 1895, The National Association of Manufacturers was organized in Cincinnati, OH. 1900, Off of South Africa, the British released the German steamer Herzog, which had been seized on January 6. 1901, Queen Victoria of England died after reigning for nearly 64 years. Edward VII, her son, succeeded her. 1903, The Hay-Herrn Treaty was signed by United States Secretary of State John M. Hay and Colombian Charg Dr. Toms Herrn. The treaty granted the United States rights to the land proposed for the Panama Canal. 1905, Insurgent workers were fired on in St Petersburg, Russia, resulting in "Bloody Sunday." 500 people were killed. 1917, U.S. President Wilson pleaded for an end to war in Europe, calling for "peace without victory." America entered the war the following April. 1924, Ramsay MacDonald became Britain's first Labour Prime Minister. 1930, In New York, excavation began for the Empire State Building. 1936, In Paris, Premier Pierre Laval resigned over diplomatic failure in the Ethiopian crisis. 1938, "Our Town," by Thornton Wilder, was performed publicly for the first time, in Princeton, NJ. 1941, Britain captured Tobruk from German forces. 1944, Allied forces began landing at Anzio, Italy, during World War II. 1947, KTLA, Channel 5, in Hollywood, CA, began operation as the first commercial television station west of the Mississippi River. 1950, Alger Hiss, a former adviser to U.S. President Franklin Roosevelt, was convicted of perjury for denying contacts with a Soviet agent. He was sentenced to five years in prison. 1951, Fidel Castro was ejected from a Winter League baseball game after hitting a batter. He later gave up baseball for politics. 1953, The Arthur Miller drama "The Crucible" opened on Broadway. 1956, Raymond Burr starred as Captain Lee Quince in the "Fort Laramie" debut on CBS radio. 1957, Suspected "Mad Bomber" was arrested in Waterbury, CT. George P. Metesky was accused of planting more than 30 explosive devices in the New York City area. 1957, The Israeli army withdrew from the Sinai. They had invaded Egypt on October 29, 1956. 1959, British world racing champion Mike Hawthorn was killed while driving on the Guildford bypass. 1962, Cuba's membership in the Organization of American States (OAS) was suspended. 1964, Kenneth Kaunda was sworn in as the first Prime Minister of Northern Rhodesia. 1970, The first regularly scheduled commercial flight of the Boeing 747 began in New York City and ended in London about 6 1/2 hours later. 1972, The United Kingdom, the Irish Republic, and Denmark joined the EEC. 1973, Joe Frazier lost the first fight of his professional career to George Foreman. He had been the undefeated heavyweight world champion since February 16, 1970 when he knocked out Jimmy Ellis. 1973, The U.S. Supreme Court struck down state laws that had been restricting abortions during the first six months of pregnancy. The case (Roe vs. Wade) legalized abortion. 1983, Bjorn Borg retired from tennis. He had set a record by winning 5 consecutive Wimbledon championships. 1984, Apple introduced the Macintosh during the third quarter of Super Bowl XVIII. 1987, Phil Donahue became the first talk show host to tape a show from inside the Soviet Union. The shows were shown later in the year. 1992, Rebel soldiers seized the national radio station in Kinshasa, Zaire's capital, and broadcast a demand for the government's resignation. 1995, Two Palestinian suicide bombers from the Gaza Strip detonated powerful explosives at a military transit point in central Israel, killing 19 Israelis. 1997, The U.S. Senate confirmed Madeleine Albright as the first female secretary of state. 1998, Theodore Kaczynski pled guilty to federal charges for his role as the Unabomber. He agreed to life in prison without parole. 2000, Elian Gonzalez's grandmothers met privately with U.S. Attorney General Janet Reno as they appealed for help in removing the boy from his Florida relatives and reuniting him with his father in Cuba. 2001, Former National Football League (NFL) player Rae Carruth was sentenced to a minimum 18 years and 11 months in prison for his role in the 1999 shooting death of his pregnant girlfriend, Cherica Adams. Adams died a month later from her wounds. The baby survived and lives with the victim's mother. 2001, Acting on a tip, authorities captured four of the "Texas 7" in Woodland Park, CO, at a convenience store. A fifth convict killed himself inside a motor home. 2002, In Calcutta, India, Heavily armed gunmen attacked the U.S. government cultural center. Five police officers were killed and twenty others, including one pedestrian and one private security guard, were wounded. 2002, Lawyers suing Enron Corp. asked a court to prevent further shredding of documents due to the pending federal investigation. 2002, Amazon.com announced that it had posted its first net profit in the fourth quarter (quarter ending December 31, 2001). 2002, AOL Time Warner filed suit against Microsoft in federal court seeking damages for harm done to AOL's Netscape Internet Browser when Microsoft began giving away its competing browser. 2002, Marc Chagall's work "Study for 'Over Vitebsk" was found at a postal installation in Topeka, KS. The 8x10 oil painting is valued at about $1 million. The work was stolen a year before from the Jewish Museum in New York City. 2002, Kmart Corp. filed for Chapter 11 bankruptcy making it the largest retailer in history to seek legal protection from its creditors. 2003, In New York, the "Leonardo da Vinci, Master Draftsmen" exhibit opened at the Metropolitan Museum of Art. 2003, It was reported that scientists in China had found fossilized remains of a dinosaur with four feathered wings. 2022 Do smiled.
If you can help with the cost of the
Humor Letter, please donate what you can! |  |
Go to TOP
Well, Do , that's all for today.
Have FUN !
Dear Webby from Webby.com
Please give a friend a subscription to the Humor Letter
If the greeting on top does NOT have your first name,
or at least your favorite nickname, please tell me.
I can correct that in two seconds and greet you properly
from then on.
If you want to give a gift subscription to a friend, but don't
have time to subscribe her or him, just hit REPLY and tell me.
I will gladly enter them for you and send them a confirmation request.
To reply to me personally, just hit REPLY or write to humor@webby.com
If you do not normally get the Humor Letter every day, and this was the first time,
then a friend sent you a one time sample or maybe even gave you a gift subscription.
If you like the Humor Letter, then you can subscribe at http://webby.com/sub.html
You can also UNsubscribe there.
If you don't want to receive the Webby Humor Letter,
please unsubscribe by clicking the link below:
You are currently subscribed to the Regular HTML version with this address:
newsletter@newslettercollector.com
UNSUBSCRIBE from the regular HTMLversion
| . |
Privacy Policy | About 
