Good Morning, Do, Today is Thursday, August 24 Thank you, Norm!!! From here in Canada what is going on in the US looks ridiculously insane. Robert E Lee was never a slave owner, and the feds wanted him as a general, but he decided to defend the Virginia hillbillies against the feds and their unilateral decisions. There was nothing racial about it, just the Southern Hillbillies standing up against the feds. If these L-.... swallowed a bunch of mosquitos to get their combined IQ to a positive number, then they would make Robert E Lee their hero and patron saint. After all, they want to stand up against the feds. Aside from Soros and Hillary, WHO is their hero? Who else pays them? Have Fun! Dearwebby Todays Bonehead Award: Parents arrested, children in state custody after raid of Florida grow house Bonehead ______________________________________________________ Today, Aug 24 in 1814 Washington, DC, was invaded by Canadians who set fire to the White House and Capitol. The White House got its name when it was whitewashed after the fire. Canadians still brag about that. The US retaliated by burning down York. York was rebuilt as Toronto. See More of what happened on this day in history. ______________________________________________________ If you can help with the cost of the Humor Letter, please donate what you can! | | ______________________________________________________ None but a coward dares to boast that he has never known fear. --- Ferdinand Foch (1851 - 1929) Life is pleasant. Death is peaceful. It's the transition that's troublesome. --- Isaac Asimov (1920 - 1992) ______________________________________________________ If you like the Humor Letter, please vote! ______________________________________________________ >From Cindy I feel like my body has gotten totally out of shape, so I got my doctor's permission to join a fitness club and start exercising. I decided to take an aerobics class. I bent, twisted, gyrated, jumped up and down, and perspired for an hour. But, by the time I got my leotards on, the class was over. _____________________________________________________ ______________________________________________________ "I've never flown before, said the nervous old lady to the pilot. You will bring me down safely, won't you?" "All I can say ma'am, said the pilot, is that I've never left anyone up there yet!" ______________________________________________________ Mt Rainier _____________________________________________________ If you like the Humor Letter, please vote! Thanks for your votes! ______________________________________________________ Reported by the Bausell Sailor An INTERNATIONAL BONEHEAD AWARD has been earned by Rolando Naranjo, 41, Betsy Espinoza,33, Hialeah, Floriduh Parents arrested, children in state custody after raid of Florida grow house A suspected marijuana grow house in Hialeah has two parents in custody and children found inside in the hands of the Department of Children and Families. The Miami Herald reports a Palm Springs Middle School teacher noticed the smell of marijuana coming from the 11-year-old boy's backpack. He notified a Miami-Dade Schools police officer. A police report says the boy told officers there are marijuana plants in his house and his dad uses his backpack to transport the drug. He also said people go to his house to buy marijuana. The raid happened Monday at an apartment complex on West 25th Court and West 60th Street. 41-year-old Rolando Naranjo and 32- year-old Betsy Espinoza were arrested and are facing multiple counts, including marijuana possession, possession of manufacturing equipment and child neglect. Police say they had received a call after a teacher for the couple's 11-year-old child said his clothes smelled like marijuana. Once they entered the home, they found the parents, the 11-year-old and a four-year-old child were living in one room while the other bedroom in the apartment was being used to grow the drug. A police report said there was very little food in the house as well as mold growing and dirty clothes throughout the home - along with no way to prevent the kids from entering the room with the drugs. Officials confiscated 10 marijuana plants, weighing a total of 31 pounds, along with high wattage lamps, scales, pipes and other items used for distribution and sale. The apartment is located less than 1000 feet from Ben Shepherd Elementary School. _________________________________ Tech Support Pits From: Rhonda Re: Printing multiple copies with ClickBook Dear Webby, You wrote about printing brochures with ClickBook a while back. Do you have to print one brochure and then drop the printed paper down into feed bin after each brochure, or can you print a whole bunch at a time? Thanks Rhonda Dear Rhonda You can print one side of a whole bunch of brochures, and then drop the whole stack of them down into the feed tray. If you set it for more copies than you have paper in the tray, it will give you a paper error and continue peacefully after you refill the tray. I wish the folding and stapling was that easy! Have FUN! DearWebby Thanks to Dave for this story: My job is in the aerospace industry, and it's always been a challenge to explain what kind of work I do. At one gathering, I tried several unsuccessful attempted explanations before deciding to be as generic as possible. When the subject came up while I was talking with a group of guys, I replied simply, "Defense contractor." The men nodded, and as the conversation went on, I silently declared victory to myself. Then, one of them turned to me and asked, "So, what do you put up mainly? Chain-link, or picket?" If you can help with the cost of the Humor Letter, please donate what you can! | | Daily tip from Thriftyfun.com Saving Money on Video Games Don't buy games as soon as they come out. A year later you can often find games for half their original price. Even if you only wait a few weeks you can find the hot games in the used market at local stores or on eBay. Tip provided by Thriftyfun.com ____________________________________________________ | Cards with Willie Nelson | ____________________________________________________ Mike's parents have four children. Their names are Penny, Dime and Quarter. What is the fourth child's name? (Answer at the end) ___________________________________________________ | A Rift Runs Through It: Iceland's Divergence of the Plates 2017. | ___________________________________________________ After much urging by his wife, my Uncle Joe applied for work on a farm. The foreman decided to give him a try and handed Joe a stool and a bucket and told him to milk a cow. An hour later Uncle Joe returned dirty and sweaty, the bucket in one hand and the broken stool in the other. "Extracting the milk was easy," he explained. "The worst part was getting the cow to sit on the stool." Ophelia Dingbatter's NewsNo sermon and not suitable for church, just jokes and fun for grownups. Read it on-line or subscribe. If you subscribe, look for the double opt-in confirmation request. | ____________________________________________________ A noted psychiatrist was a guest at an opera lover's banquet, and his hostess naturally broached the subject in which the doctor was most at ease. "Would you mind telling me, Doctor," she asked, "how you detect a mental deficiency in somebody who appears completely normal?" "Nothing is easier," he replied. "You ask him a simple question which everyone should answer with no trouble. If he hesitates, that puts you on the track." "What sort of question?" "Well, you might ask him, 'Captain Cook made three trips around the world and died during one of them. Which one?' The woman thought a moment, then said with a nervous laugh, "You wouldn't happen to have another example, would you? I must confess I don't know much about history." ____________________________________________________ Today, August 24, in 0079 Mount Vesuvius erupted killing approximately 20,000 people. The cities of Pompeii, Stabiae and Herculaneum were buried in volcanic ash. 0410 The Visigoths overran Rome. This event symbolized the fall of the Western Roman Empire. 1456 The printing of the Gutenberg Bible was completed. 1572 The Catholics began their slaughter of the French Protestants in Paris. The killings claimed about 70,000 people. 1814 Washington, DC, was invaded by Canadians who set fire to the White House and Capitol. The White House got its name when it was whitewashed after the fire. Canadians still brag about that. The US retaliated by burning down York. York was rebuilt as Toronto. 1869 A patent for the waffle iron was received by Cornelius Swarthout. 1891 Thomas Edison applied patents for the kinetoscope and kinetograph (U.S. Pats. 493,426 and 589,168). 1912 A four-pound limit was set for parcels sent through the U.S. Post Office mail system. Sending kids by mail remained illegal. 1932 Amelia Earhart became the first woman to fly across the U.S. non-stop. The trip from Los Angeles, CA to Newark, NJ, took about 19 hours. 1949 The North Atlantic Treaty Organization (NATO) went into effect. The agreement was that an attack against on one of the parties would be considered "an attack against them all." 1954 The Communist Party was virtually outlawed in the U.S. when the Communist Control Act went into effect. 1959 Three days after Hawaiian statehood, Hiram L. Fong was sworn in as the first Chinese-American U.S. senator while Daniel K. Inouye was sworn in as the first Japanese-American U.S. representative. 1963 John Pennel pole-vaulted 17 feet and 3/4 inches becoming the first to break the 17-foot barrier. 1968 France became the 5th thermonuclear power when they exploded a hydrogen bomb in the South Pacific. 1985 27 anti-apartheid leaders were arrested in South Africa as racial violence rocked the country. 1986 Frontier Airlines shut down. Thousands of people were left stranded. 1989 "Total war" was declared by Columbian drug lords on their government. 1989 The U.S. space probe, Voyager 2, sent back photographs of Neptune. 1990 Iraqi troops surrounded foreign missions in Kuwait. 1991 Russian President Mikhail Gorbachev resigned as the head of the Communist Party. 1992 China and South Korea established diplomatic relations. 1995 Microsoft's "Windows 95" went on sale. 1998 U.S. officials cited a soil sample as part of the evidence that a Sudan plant was producing precursors to the VX nerve gas. And, therefore made it a target for U.S. missiles on August 20, 1998. 1998 A donation of 24 beads was made, from three parties, to the Indian Museum of North America at the Crazy Horse Memorial. The beads are said to be those that were used in 1626 to buy Manhattan from the Indians. 2001 In McAllen, TX, Bridgestone/Firestone agreed to settle out of court and pay a reported $7.5 million to a family in a rollover accident in their Ford Explorer. 2001 The remains of nine American servicemen killed in the Korean War were returned to the U.S. The bodies were found about 60 miles north of Pyongyang. It was estimated that it would be a year before the identies of the soldiers would be known. 2001 U.S. District Judge Colleen Kollar-Kotelly was randomly picked to take over the Microsoft monopoly case. The judge was to decide how Microsoft should be punished for illegally trying to squelch its competitors. 2001 NASA announced that operation of the Upper Atmosphere Research Satellite would end by September 30th due to budget restrictions. Though the satellite is best known for monitoring a hole in the ozone layer over Antarctica, it was designed to provide information about the upper atmosphere by measuring its winds, temperatures, chemistry and energy received from the sun. 2006 The planet Pluto was reclassified as a "dwarf planet" by the International Astronomical Union (IAU). Pluto's status was changed due to the IAU's new rules for an object qualifying as a planet. Pluto met two of the three rules because it orbits the sun and is large enough to assume a nearly round shape. However, since Pluto has an oblong orbit and overlaps the orbit of Neptune it disqualified Pluto as a planet. 2017 Do smiled. | Mike's name is Mike
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