Good Morning, Do! Today is Wednesday, March 29 ___________________________________________________ History: 2004 - Bulgaria, Estonia, Latvia, Lithuania, Romania, Slovakia and Slovenia became members of NATO. ____________________________________________________ Bonehead Award: Wife accused of murdering husband on Facebook Live _____________________________________________ Q We need a president who's fluent in at least one language. --- Buck Henry Literature is an occupation in which you have to keep proving your talent to people who have none. --- Jules Renard (1864 - 1910) ________________________________________________ The boss ordered one of his men to dig a hole 8-feet deep. After the job was completed the boss returned and explained an error had been made and the hole wouldn't be needed. "Fill 'er up," he ordered. The worker did as he'd been told. But he ran into a problem. He couldn't get all the dirt packed back into the hole without leaving a mound on top. He went to the office and explained his problem. The boss snorted. "Honestly! The kind of help you get these days! There's obviously only one thing to do. You'll have to dig that hole deeper!" __________________________________________ After receiving his pills from the pharmacist, the customer asked, "Are these time release pills?" The pharmacist replied, "Yes. They begin to work after your check clears." __________________________________________ There was a Barber Shop on a military reservation, and a Colonel and a Sergeant are both getting haircuts. The Colonel's barber is about done with him, and asks him if he wishes hair tonic. The Colonel says, "Hell no, if I get that stuff on my hair, my wife will think I've been in a whorehouse!" Right after that, the Sergeant's barber asks him the same question. The Sergeant replies, "Go ahead and put some on, my wife doesn't know what the inside of a whorehouse smells like!" ___________________________________________________ If you can spare a coin, PLEASE hit PayPal with it! ___________________________________________________ A mouse returned from the laboratory to his cage and told a fellow mouse, "I've finally got Dr. Snooker trained." "You have?" asked the other. "Yes, explained the first mouse. "Every time I press down a bar, he gives me food." ___________________________________________________ A man bought several acres of wasteland and within a year, turned it into a thriving produce farm. The local pastor stopped by and complimented the man on his vast progress. Then he added, "Wondrous things can surely happen when man and God work together." "Amen," said the man, "but you should've seen the place when God was running it alone." _________________________________________________  Mount Fuji ________________________________________________ A couple of young boys were fishing at their special pond off the beaten track. All of a sudden, the Game Warden jumped out of the bushes. Immediately, one of the boys threw his rod down and started running through the woods. The Game Warden was hot on his heels. After about a half mile, the young man stopped and stooped over with his hands on his thighs to catch his breath, so the Game Warden finally caught up to him. "Let's see yer fishin' license, Boy!" the Warden gasped. With that, the boy pulled out his wallet and gave the Game Warden a valid fishing license. "Well, son," said the Game Warden, "you must be about as dumb as a box of rocks! You don't have to run from me if you have a valid license!" "Yes, sir," replied the kid, "but my friend back there, he doesnt have one." ____________________________________________________ The summer band class was just getting under way when a large insect flew into the room. The sixth-graders, eager to play their shiny new instruments, tried to ignore the buzzing intruder, but eventually one student could stand it no more. He rolled up his music book and swatted the insect, then he stomped on it to ensure its fate. "Is it a bee?" another student asked. "Nope," he replied. "It's a bee flat." ____________________________________________________  ____________________________________________________ Hurricane season is next. Are all yall crazy toilet peper hoarders going to go nuts on lightbulbs, in case the power goes out? ___________________________________________________ "Hey, Mom," asked Little Johnny "can you give me twenty dollars?" "Certainly not." "If you do," he went on, "I'll tell you what dad said to the maid when you were at the beauty shop." His mother's ears perked up and, grabbing her purse, she handed over the money. "Well? What did he say?" "He said, 'Hey, Marie, make sure you remind me on Saturday, that it is geramma's birthday.' __________________________________________________ An INTERNATIONAL BONEHEAD AWARD has been reported by Rock  Kadejah Michelle Brown, 28, Lowndes County, Mississippi, USA Wife accused of murdering husband on Facebook Live A Mississippi woman is in custody after authorities believe she murdered her husband on Facebook Live. The Lowndes County Sheriff's said deputies responded to a domestic violence call Saturday morning on the 500 block of Green Tree Drive. They arrested Kadejah Michelle Brown, 28, after believing she shot and killed her husband. Authorities said the 28-year-old male victim died from a single gunshot wound and was pronounced dead on the scene. Investigators believe the couple were involved into an argument that turned physical. The incident was captured on Facebook Live. _________________________________________________ DearWebby's Tech Support Pits From: Nelson Re: Reboot how often? Dear Webby, How often and how frequently do I have to reboot my W10 machine? Thanks Nelson Dear Nelson The same as with W7. The fewer times you reboot, the less damage Windows does. If you have MalwareBytes running, then the machine is protected. Just relax. You may have to reboot now and then when you are installing or UNinstalling something. That is enough. Have FUN! DearWebby _____________________________________________________ Today, March 29 in 1461 - Edward IV secured his claim to the English throne by defeating Henry VI's Lancastrians at the battle of Towdon. 1638 - First permanent European settlement in Delaware was established. 1847 - U.S. troops under General Winfield Scott took possession of the Mexican stronghold at Vera Cruz. 1848 - Niagara Falls stopped flowing for one day due to an ice jam. 1867 - The British Parliament passed the North America Act to create the Dominion of Canada. 1882 - The Knights of Columbus organization was granted a charter by the State of Connecticut. 1901 - The first federal elections were held in Australia. 1903 - A regular news service began between New York and London on Marconi's wireless. 1906 - In the U.S., 500,000 coal miners walked off the job seeking higher wages. 1913 - The Reichstag announced a raise in taxes in order to finance the new military budget. 1916 - The Italians call off the fifth attack on Isonzo. 1936 - Italy firebombed the Ethiopian city of Harar. 1941 - The British sank five Italian warships off the Peloponnesus coast in the Mediterranean. 1943 - In the U.S. rationing of meat, butter and cheese began during World War II. 1946 - Fiorella LaGuardia became the director general of the United Nations Relief and Rehabilitation Organization. 1946 - Gold Coast became the first British colony to hold an African parliamentary majority. 1951 - The Chinese reject MacArthur's offer for a truce in Korea. 1951 - In the United States, Julius and Ethel Rosenberg were convicted of conspiracy to commit espionage. They were executed in June 19, 1953. 1961 - The 23rd amendment to the U.S. Constitution was ratified. The amendment allowed residents of Washington, DC, to vote for president. 1962 - Cuba opened the trial of the Bay of Pigs invaders. 1966 - Leonid Brezhnev became the First Secretary of the Soviet Communist Party. He denounced the American policy in Vietnam and called it one of aggression. 1967 - France launched its first nuclear submarine. 1971 - Lt. William Calley Jr., of the U.S. Army, was found guilty of the premeditated murder of at least 22 Vietnamese civilians. He was sentenced to life imprisonment. The trial was the result of the My Lai massacre in Vietnam on March 16, 1968. 1971 - A jury in Los Angeles recommended the death penalty for Charles Manson and three female followers for the 1969 Tate-La Bianca murders. The death sentences were later commuted to live in prison. 1973 - "Hommy," the Puerto Rican version of the rock opera "Tommy," opened in New York City. 1973 - The last U.S. troops left South Vietnam. 1974 - Mariner 10, the U.S. space probe became the first spacecraft to reach the planet Mercury. It had been launched on November 3, 1973. 1974 - Eight Ohio National Guardsmen were indicted on charges stemming from the shooting deaths of four students at Kent State University on May 4, 1970. All the guardsmen were later acquitted. 1975 - Egyptian president Anwar Sadat declared that he would reopen the Suez Canal on June 5, 1975. 1979 - The Committee on Assassinations Report issued by U.S. House of Representatives stated the assassination of President John F. Kennedy was the result of a conspiracy. 1983 - Erno Rubik was granted a patent for his Magic Cube. (U.S. Patent 4,378,116) 1986 - A court in Rome acquitted six men in a plot to kill the Pope. 1987 - Hulk Hogan took 11 minutes, 43 seconds to pin Andre the Giant in front of 93,136 at Wrestlemania III fans at the Silverdome in Pontiac, MI. 1992 - Democratic presidential front-runner Bill Clinton said "I didn't inhale and I didn't try it again" in reference to when he had experimented with marijuana. 1993 - The South Korean government agreed to pay financial support to women who had been forced to have sex with Japanese troops during World War II. 1993 - Clint Eastwood won his first Oscars. He won them for best film and best director for the film "Unforgiven." 1995 - The U.S. House of Representatives rejected a constitutional amendment that would have limited terms to 12 years in the U.S. House and Senate. 1998 - Tennessee won the woman's college basketball championship over Louisiana. Tennessee had set a NCAA record with regular season record of 39-0. 1999 - At least 87 people died in an earthquake in India's Himalayan foothills. 1999 - The Dow Jones industrial average closed above the 10,000 mark for the first time. 2004 - Bulgaria, Estonia, Latvia, Lithuania, Romania, Slovakia and Slovenia became members of NATO. 2010 - In Japan, the Tokyo Skytree tower became the tallest structure in Japan when it reached 1,109 feet. 2023, Do smiled.
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