Dear Webby's Humor Letter
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 Good Morning, Do! Today is Wednesday, January 29  Voting is NOT repaired. You can vote, if you register, but not if you try to vote with the email confirmation request. Try writing to them. They seem to have me blocked because of my red hat or because I am not a Women's Libber, or are not able to respond to me. Their addresses are: support@cumuli.com, lewis@cumuli.com, stewart@cumuli.com, suport@ezinefinder.com, lasso@cumuli.com Write to one and CC to the others.  ___________________________________________________ Today, January 29 in  1886 The first successful petrol-driven motorcar, built by Karl Benz, was patented.  ______________________________________________________ 
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Today's Bonehead Award: CA father arrested for killing five of his infants __________________________________________ Football is a mistake. It combines the two worst elements of American life. Violence and committee meetings. --- George F. Will (1941 - ) __________________________________________ If you like the Humor Letter, please vote! __________________________________________ You might be a red neck if...... You've been married three times and still have the same in-laws. Anyone in your family ever died right after saying, "Hey, y'all watch this!" You've got more than one brother named 'Darryl.' Your Junior/Senior Prom had a Daycare. The value of your truck goes up and down, depending on how much gas it has in it. Ya can't get married to the mother of your two youngest kids, 'cause there's a law against it. You dated one of your parents' current spouses in high school. You think loading the dishwasher means getting your wife drunk. You win the most fingers and toes contest at your local bar. You read this and say "Yeah, so.....what's your point?" ________________________________________________` Gdynia, Poland ____________________________________________________
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___________________________________________________ An INTERNATIONAL BONEHEAD AWARD has been earned by Paul Perez, 57, Delano, California

CA father arrested for killing five of his infants

A California man has been arrested in the decades-old killings of five of his infant children, a case the sheriff said has haunted my agency for years. I cannot think of a case more disturbing than this one. There can be no victim more vulnerable and innocent than an infant and unfortunately this case involves five of them, Yolo County Sheriff Tom Lopez said. This case reveals an unspeakable evil. Paul Perez, 57, of Delano was arrested at a state prison days before he was expected to be released on unrelated charges. He was arrested in the deaths of his children born between 1992 and 2001. Authorities started investigating after the decomposed remains of the child recently identified as 3-month-old Nikko Lee Perez were found in 2007 in a sealed, submerged box in an irrigation slough near Woodland, California, about 80 miles (130 kilometers) northeast of San Francisco. The remains were identified in October using new DNA techniques that authorities have begun applying widely in the wake of other recently solved cases. Department of Justice officials checked the database weekly for direct matches. Perez is charged with five counts of premeditated murder with special circumstances of lying in wait, torture and multiple victims. He also faces charges for assault on a child under 8 for the same victims and criminal enhancements for his prior convictions. District Attorney Jeff Reisig said Perez is eligible for the death penalty but he has not yet decided whether to pursue it. Perez is scheduled to be arraigned Tuesday. The investigation in this case uncovered a deeply disturbing and chilling case of infanticide, Reisig said. Officials declined to say how the children were killed, whether Perez has other children or family members, or whether all the babies have the same mother. They asked for witnesses who know Perez or the children to come forward. The remains of three of the children have not been found. Nikkos body was found on March 29, 2007, in an irrigation canal popular with anglers looking for carp or catfish. Fisherman Brian Roller told reporters at the time that he shot an arrow into the murky water and it struck a box buried under the mud. When he hauled it out of the water and opened it, he found stones and pieces of metal used to weigh it down. The babys badly decomposed body wrapped in a blanket. Authorities said a decomposed diaper was also in the box, indicating the infant, who was born in 1996, had been cared for at some point. Investigators immediately treated the case as a homicide and submitted the babys DNA to the U.S. Department of Justice in hopes of obtaining an identity. They also enlisted the help of a forensic anthropologist, who determined the remains were those of a boy about one month old who died of blunt force trauma.
DearWebby's Tech Support Pits From: Jim Re: SMTP Overload at RR Dear Webby Thanks for everything, your humor letter, your computer tips and for helping Ophelia. Another question, when sending from my Eudora, I have been getting this error message. It will send "in time," but this has happened a lot today. Any suggestions? Many thanks again. JH Dear Jim Rural Route Road Runner is stuck up and choking. Probably one of their "techs" is sending out a shitload of spam and has overloaded their SMTP server again. If you are in a big hurry to get a message out, use Gmail for a few hours. Their overloads don't usually last longer than that. Hammering the re-send does not help at all, when they are already choking. Just ignore them and use Gmail for a while. You COULD phone them and bitch, but you would most likely be talking to the one, who is causing the problem, and just get bullshit excuses. Have FUN! DearWebby
Automatically move ALL your settings and programs.
On the outskirts of town, there was a big old pecan tree by the cemetery fence. One day two boys filled up 2 buckets with pecans and sat down by the tree, out of sight, and began dividing the nuts. "One for you, and one for me. One for you, one for me," said one boy. Several were dropped and rolled down toward the fence. Another boy came riding along the road on his bicycle. As he passed, he thought he heard voices from inside the cemetery. He slowed down to investigate. Sure enough, he heard, "One for you, one for me. One for you, one for me." He just knew what it was. "Oh my," he shuddered, "It's Satan and the Lord dividing the souls at the cemetery." He jumped back on his bike and rode off. Just around the bend he met an old man with a cane, hobbling along. "Come here quick," said the boy, "You won't believe what I just heard. Satan and the Lord are down at the cemetery dividing up souls." The man said. "Beat it, kid, can't you see it's hard for me to walk?" When the boy insisted, the man hobbled to the cemetery. Standing by the fence they heard, "One for you, one for me. One for you, one for me. " The old man whispered, "Boy, you, you've been tellin' the truth! Let's see the devil himself." Shaking with fear, they peered through the fence, yet were still unable to see anything. The old man and the boy gripped the wrought iron bars of the fence tighter and tighter as they tried to get a glimpse of Satan. At last they heard, "One for you, one for me. And one last one for you. That's all. Now let's go get those nuts by the fence, and we'll be done." They say the old guy made it back to town 5 minutes before the boy.
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___________________________________________________ Daily tip from Thriftyfun.com Thriftyfun.com Adding Fresh Flowers to Cake Decoration By 15mhhm15 Fresh Flowers on cake Thriftyfun.com also has a newsletter. If you want more than just one tip per day, or if you want to share your tips, then you can subscribe to it here: ThriftyFun ____________________________________________________
Amazing Snow Art
___________________________________________________ >From Ilse When I was 28, I was teaching English in a high school where occasionally the faculty and staff were allowed to dress down. One of those days I donned a sweatshirt and jeans. A student came in, and his eyes widened. "Wow!" he exclaimed. "You should wear clothes like that every day. You look twenty, maybe even thirty years younger. ___________________________________________________ A farmer & his hired man were eating breakfast at the local diner. Thinking of all the work they had to get done that day, the farmer told the hired man he might as well go ahead & eat his dinner too. The hired man didn't say a word, but filled his plate a second time & proceeded to eat. After awhile the farmer said, "We've got so much work to do today, you might as well eat your supper now too." Again, the hired man didn't respond but refilled his plate a third time & continued to eat. Finally, after eating his third plate of food, the hired man pushed back his chair & began to take off his shoes. "What are you doing?" the farmer asked. The hired man replied, "I don't work after supper." ___________________________________________________ "Louisa, could you help me with my math homework?" asked her younger brother. Certainly not," replied Louisa indignantly. "It wouldn't be right." "Probably not," said her brother, "but you could at least try and show me how you faked it !" __________________________________________________
Ophelia Dingbatter's NewsNo sermon and not suitable for church, just jokes and fun for grownups. Read it on-line or subscribe. If you subscribe, look for the double opt-in confirmation request.
___________________________________________________
 Today January 29 in 1820 Britain's King George III died insane at Windsor Castle. 1845 Edgar Allan Poe's "The Raven" was published for the first time in the "New York Evening Mirror." 1848 Greenwich Mean Time was adopted by Scotland. 1850 Henry Clay introduced in the Senate a compromise bill on slavery that included the admission of California into the Union as a free state. 1886 The first successful petrol-driven motorcar, built by Karl Benz, was patented. 1916 In World War I, Paris was bombed by German zeppelins for the first time. 1924 R. Taylor patented the ice cream cone rolling machine. 1940 The W. Atlee Burpee Seed Company displayed the first tetraploid flowers at the New York City Flower Show. 1949 "The Newport News" was commissioned as the first air- conditioned naval ship in Virginia. 1958 Charles Starkweather was captured by police in Wyoming. 1963 Britain was refused entry into the EEC. 1979 U.S. President Carter formally welcomed Chinese Vice Premier Deng Xiaoping to the White House. The visit followed the establishment of diplomatic relations. 1987 "Physicians Weekly" announced that the smile on the face of Leonardo DeVinci's Mona Lisa was caused by a "...facial paralysis resulting from a swollen nerve behind the ear." 1990 Joseph Hazelwood, the former skipper of the Exxon Valdez, went on trial in Anchorage, AK, on charges that stemmed from America's worst oil spill. Hazelwood was later acquitted of all the major charges and was convicted of a misdemeanor. 1996 French President Jacques Chirac announced the "definitive end" to nuclear testing. 1997 America Online agreed to give refunds to frustrated customers under threat of lawsuits across the country. Customers were unable to log on after AOL offered a flat $19.95-a-month rate. 1998 A bomb exploded at an abortion clinic in Birmingham, AL, killing an off-duty policeman and severely wounding a nurse. Eric Rudolph was charged with this bombing and three other attacks in Atlanta. 1999 The U.S. Senate delivered subpoenas for Monica Lewinsky and two presidential advisers for private, videotaped testimony in the impeachment trial. 2001 In Indonesia, thousands of student protesters stormed the parliament property and demanded that President Abdurrahman Wahid quit due to his alleged involvement in two corruption scandals. Wahid announced that he would not resign. 2014 Archaeologists announced that they had uncovered what they believed to be the oldest temple in Roman antiquity. The temple was found at the Sant'Omobono site in central Rome. 2019 Do smiled. 

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