Good Morning, Do! Today is Wednesday, June 13 Have FUN! Dearwebby Todays Bonehead Award: Appeal denied for wannabe kidnapper Bonehead ______________________________________________________ Today, June 13 in 1920 The U.S. Post Office Department ruled that children may not be sent by parcel post. More of today in history at HIstory ______________________________________________________ If you can help with the cost of the Humor Letter, please donate what you can! | | ______________________________________________________ Idealism is what precedes experience; cynicism is what follows. ---David T. Wolf (1943 - ) On the whole human beings want to be good, but not too good, and not quite all the time. --- George Orwell (1903 - 1950) Mothers are fonder than fathers of their children because they are more certain they are their own. ---Aristotle ______________________________________________________ If you like the Humor Letter, please vote! ______________________________________________________ A noted psychiatrist was a guest at a gathering, and Anni, his hostess, naturally broached the subject in which the doctor was most at ease. "Would you mind telling me, Doctor," Anni asked, "how you detect a mental deficiency in somebody who appears completely normal?" "Nothing is easier," he replied. "You ask him a simple question which everyone should answer with no trouble. If he hesitates, that puts you on the track." "What sort of question?" Anni questioned. "Well, you might ask him, 'Captain Cook made three trips around the world and died during one of them. Which one?' Anni thought a moment, then said with a nervous laugh, "You wouldn't happen to have another example would you? I must confess I don't know much about history." _____________________________________________________ ______________________________________________________ _____________________________________________________ If you like the Humor Letter, please vote! Thanks for your votes! _____________________________________________________ Terri and Buzz, a retired couple from New York City, living in Miami, are getting ready to go out to dinner. Terri says, "Buzz, darling, do you want me to wear this Chanel suit or the Gucci?" Buzz says, "Do I care?" A few minutes later Terri says, "Buzz, should I wear my Cartier watch or my Rolex?" Buzz says, "Who cares?" A few more minutes pass and Terri says, "Buzz, love, shall I wear my five-carat pear diamond ring or my six-carat round diamond ring with the baguettes?" Buzz says, "Terri, I really don't care what you wear, but if you don't move your butt , we're going to miss the Early Bird Special at McDonalds. ____________________________________________________ An INTERNATIONAL BONEHEAD AWARD has been earned by Todd Richard Ferry, 59, in jail in Pennsylvania Appeal denied for wannabe kidnapper A middle-aged man who tried to kidnap a teenage Mennonite girl in the driveway of her family's home deserves the 10- to 20-year prison sentence he's serving for the crime, a state appeals court panel has ruled. The fact that Todd Richard Ferry left an anonymous apology note in the family's mailbox the day after the kidnapping attempt in no way lessens the terrifying impact of what he tried to do, Judge Mary Jane Bowes concluded in the Superior Court's opinion. Investigators said Ferry, now 59, of New Enterprise, had an obsession with Mennonite girls in Bedford County long before he tried to snatch the 17-year-old off her bicycle in November 2014. The girl told police that she rode her bike home from work at a produce farm and was getting mail from her family's mailbox when a man knocked her off her bike and grabbed her. She didn't see her attacker's face, but heard him say, "Get in the car, you're coming with me." She broke free and ran home, but not before her assailant ripped her dress and bruised her shoulders and knees. The girl's mother called state police the next day after finding an envelope in her mailbox from the attacker. "I'm sorry about the wrestling match I had with you," the unsigned note read. "I fell in love with you...There is no way to approach you and now I have failed my only way...I still want to meet you and you don't need to fear me." Police said they later found Ferry's DNA on that envelope, and on a pair of sweat pants found lying in the victim's driveway. They said Ferry at first denied trying to abduct the girl, then admitted to accosting her because "he just wanted to talk to her." A county jury convicted Ferry on charges of attempted kidnapping, false imprisonment, child luring and simple assault after hearing that evidence. Several Mennonite witnesses testified during his trial that Ferry was "overly friendly" with young Mennonite girls. In denying Ferry's appeal, Bowes rejected his arguments that his sentence the maximum allowed for his crime is too severe and that prosecutors should not have been allowed to use the DNA evidence or the testimony of other Mennonite and "English" witnesses against him. Bowes discounted Ferry's contention that there was no proof he actually was trying to kidnap the teen. She cited the terror inflicted on the girl by Ferry's "highly inappropriate attempt to get to know her by force." The evidence of Ferry's guilt is "overwhelming," the judge found. Bowes upheld Ferry's jail sentence despite his claim that "there was minimal harm caused" to the victim. Instead, Bowes agreed with county Judge Travis W. Livengood that only the maximum prison sentence was appropriate in the case. She cited Livengood's conclusions that Ferry showed "absolutely no remorse," that Ferry planned the abduction in great detail, and that his behavior was "anti-social" and "strange." Tech Support Pits From: Sandie Re: Response Challenge Dear webby, What IS a Response Challenge ? Sandie Dear Sandie A Response Challenge is when, after sending a mail to somebody, instead of an answer, you get soime silly auto-responder and are expected to prove tat you are human by punching in some hard to read numbers. It's OK to have that challenge as part of an order form, but definitely not OK with email. Like me, a lot of people filter that kind of crap into the trash, unread, just like any auto-responder. Have FUN DearWebby Automatically move ALL your settings and programs. No need to re-install them. The only mover recommended by Intel and Microsoft. Did you know that Elvis was an especially colorful character? He was a redneck who stole the blues from the blacks and sold it to the whites. If you can help with the cost of the Humor Letter, please donate what you can! | | There was an old lady named May, Took a stroll in the park by the bay. She met a young man, Who loved her and ran. Now she goes to the park everyday. ____________________________________________________ Daily tip from Thriftyfun.com How Much Work Does It Cost? Before buying a big ticket item or anything that you might not need, calculate how many hours it will take you to earn the money to buy the item. It helps me put the cost of purchases in perspective. By Beth Tip provided by Thriftyfun.com ____________________________________________________ | The forest that blooms a brilliant yellow for just a few days a year. Stunning! | ___________________________________________________ A couple of Torontonians had just closed down their store on busy Yonge Street and were standing in the middle of their empty shop when one said to the other, "I'll bet you ten bucks that if we wait here a few minutes, some Newfie is going to come by, peer through the window, and come in and ask us what we're selling." Sure enough, just as he finished speaking, a Newfie stuck his face up to the window, looked around at the empty shelves and then walked over and asked, "How's she goin, b'y. I was just wonderin' what you fellas was sellin'??" One of the Torontians grinned at the other and replied, "We're selling idiots, friend", To this the Newfie responded, "Well, ya must be doin' some good business 'cause dere's only two o' ya left." ___________________________________________________ Ophelia Dingbatter's NewsNo sermon and not suitable for church, just jokes and fun for grownups. Read it on-line or subscribe. If you subscribe, look for the double opt-in confirmation request. | Two country doctors out in the hills of West Virginia were discussing the population explosion in the world. One physician says, "Why, Bubba, thiseyer crazy birth thang isa gettin' so bad that perty soon, they ain't gonna be room for ever'body! There'sa gonna be standin' room only on this here planet!" The other doctor replied, "Heck, that sure oughta slow 'em down a bit!" ____________________________________________________ Today, June 13 in 1415 Henry the Navigator, the prince of Portugal, embarked on an expedition to Africa. 1777 The Marquis de Lafayette arrived in the American colonies to help with their rebellion against the British. 1789 Ice cream was served to General George Washington by Mrs. Alexander Hamilton. 1825 Walter Hunt patented the safety pin. Hunt then then sold the rights for $400. 1866 The 14th Amendment to the U.S. Constitution was passed by the U.S. Congress. It was ratified on July 9, 1868. The amendment was designed to grant citizenship to and protect the civil liberties of recently freed slaves. It did this by prohibiting states from denying or abridging the privileges or immunities of citizens of the United States, depriving any person of his life, liberty, or property without due process of law, or denying to any person within their jurisdiction the equal protection of the laws. 1898 The Canadian Yukon Territory was organized. 1900 China's Boxer Rebellion against foreigners and Chinese Christians erupted into violence. 1912 Captain Albert Berry made the first successful parachute jump from an airplane in Jefferson, Mississippi. 1920 The U.S. Post Office Department ruled that children may not be sent by parcel post. 1922 Charlie Osborne started the longest attack on hiccups. He hiccuped over 435 million times before stopping. He died in 1991, 11 months after his hiccups ended. 1923 The French set a trade barrier between the occupied Ruhr and the rest of Germany. That did not go over well. 1927 Charles Lindbergh was honored with a ticker-tape parade in New York City. 1927 For the first time, an American Flag was displayed from the right hand of the Statue of Liberty. 1940 Paris was evacuated before the German advance on the city. 1943 German spies landed on Long Island, New York. They were soon captured. 1944 Germany launched 10 of its new V1 rockets against Britain from a position near the Channel coast. Of the 10 rockets only 5 landed in Britain and only one managed to kill (6 people in London). 1944 Marvin Camras patented the wire recorder. 1949 Bao Dai entered Saigon to rule Vietnam. He had been installed by the French. 1951 U.N. troops seized Pyongyang, North Korea. 1966 The landmark "Miranda v. Arizona" decision was issued by the U.S. Supreme Court. The decision ruled that criminal suspects had to be informed of their constitutional rights before being questioned by police. 1971 The New York Times began publishing the "Pentagon Papers". The articles were a secret study of America's involvement in Vietnam. 1978 Israelis withdrew the last of their invading forces from Lebanon. 1979 Sioux Indians were awarded $105 million in compensation for the U.S. seizure in 1877 of their Black Hills in South Dakota. 1983 The unmanned U.S. space probe Pioneer 10 became the first spacecraft to leave the solar system. It was launched in March 1972. The first up-close images of the planet Jupiter were provided by Pioneer 10. 1988 The Liggett Group, a cigarette manufacturer, was found liable for a lung-cancer death. They were, however, found innocent by the federal jury of misrepresenting the risks of smoking. 1992 Future U.S. President Bill Clinton criticized rap singer Sister Souljah for making remarks "filled with hatred" towards whites. 1994 A jury in Anchorage, Alaska, found Exxon Corp. and Captain Joseph Hazelwood to be reckless in the Exxon Valdez oil spill. 1995 France announced that they would conduct eight more nuclear tests in the South Pacific. 2000 In Pyongyang, North Korea's leader Kim Jong Il welcomed South Korea's President Kim Dae for a three-day summit. It was the first such meeting between the leaders of North and South Korea. 2018 Do smiled. |
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