good morning, Do! Thank you, Loren!!  Today is Thursday, June 8 

Ottawa man gets 76 years in murder for hire plot An Ottawa man is being sentenced to 76 years in prison in a murder for hire plot. The Will County State's Attorney's Office says says that 44- year-old Christian Shepherd tried to hire a fellow inmate to murder four people. He's then accused of trying to hire another inmate to murder the same four people and the original would-be hit man. Shepherd was found guilty by a jury last November. Both inmates approached by Shepherd went to the police and one wore a wire during an investigation. Shepherd, a former school bus driver, was in custody in a sexual assault case in 2010 at the time. The state's attorney's office says Shepherd had wanted the inmates to murder the victim in the sexual assault case, the victim's mother, and two police officers. Shepherd will have to serve 85 percent of his sentence. He gets credit for the 12 years he's been behind bars already. ___________________________________________________ A customer was really hassling an airline agent at the ticket counter -- yelling and using foul language. However, the agent was polite, pleasant and smiled while the customer continued to abuse her. When the man finally left, the next person in line said to the agent, "Does that happen often? I can't believe how nice you were to him." The agent smiled and said, "No problem, I took care of it. He's going to Detroit. His bags are going to Bangkok." ___________________________________________________ Two drunks enter a hotel late at night. They approach the night- clerk, and one of them says: "Could you pleash give ush a bed with two rooms?" "You mean a room with two beds?" asks the clerk. "Whatever, whatever you shay." So they get a key and somehow manage to stumble upstairs to their room. After fumbling for ten minutes, they even manage to get their door open. As they stumble inside, the door closes behind them and they are in total darkness. They go forward slowly, and both fall on the bed closest to the door. "Ahh," says one, "Now we can get some sleep at last." As they try to rearrange themselves, they suddenly realize that they are not alone in their bed. "Hey! There's somebody in my bed!" says one of them. "There's somebody in my bed too!" says the other. "Let's get rid of them. We paid for this room and we're going to sleep in the beds!" says the first. They start a tremendous struggle. They heave and push until eventually one of them throws the other on the floor. "ALL RIGHT!!" he shouts, "I've thrown mine off the bed." "You're lucky," says the other, "I got thrown off and I'm too tired to fight any more." "Well, never mind," says the first, "Why don't you just come and share my bed. Let's get some schleep round here." _____________________________________________________ From: Connie RE: Search Hijacking Dear Webby, An email from security@paypal.com showed up in my mailwasher last night. I knew that MailWasher flagged it for deleting for a good reason, but I was curious and decided to play with fire. I downloaded this to see what it was, but did NOT click on the included link. And it still managed to hijack the search feature on my browser. When I turned on the computer (or rebooted), a search engine list ran down the left side column of the opening page. I could close that, but the next page I went to turned into a full screen search list. The only way to close this was to shut down the browser. After spending all morning on this, I found the CWShredder. This is a very small utility that specifically removes search hijacks. I vaguely remembered the Cool Web Search Shredder. It was a guerilla program at that time, ages ago. Now it is owned by Trend Micro. I hope they paid big money to put that great little program into their stable! It is now here: https://filehippo.com/download_cwshredder/ Still works great and fast! Connie Dear Connie! Thanks for bringing the Shredder back! Everbody, be careful with the download. TrendMicro likes to slither all kinds of ALMOST related stuff into yur path. By paying attention and not getting greedy, you CAN limit the download to just what you want. But you gotta pay attention! And, like Connie learned, when MailWasher marks something as bad, dont play with it! Have fun! Dearwebby ____________________________________________ If you can help with the cost of the humor letter, please donate what you can! If you like my work,please donate a dollar, or two, if you can afford it!Please, help me stay online! ___________________________________________________ __________________________________________________ Bob and Bill were sitting in a bar, and Bob was looking really down in the dumps. "What's the matter?" Bill asked. "I don't' get it," Bob sighed. "The dating scene is so confusing. There are so many damn people you have to please. "Like this one woman, she liked me, her mom liked me, but her father hated me. "Then there was this other woman, both of her parents really liked me, but SHE didn't like me. "And then there was this woman I met last night. She absolutely loved me, her parents seemed to really like me too, BUT her husband couldn't stand me!" _________________________________________________ Today, June 8 in 0452, Italy was invaded by Attila the Hun. 0793, The Vikings raided the Northumbrian coast of England. 1786, In New York City, commercially manufactured ice cream was advertised for the first time. 1790, The first loan for the U.S. was repaid. The Temporary Loan of 1789 was negotiated and secured on September 18, 1789 by Alexander Hamilton. 1861, Tennessee voted to secede from the Union and joined the Confederacy. 1866, Prussia annexed the region of Holstein. 1869, Ives W. McGaffey received a U.S. patent for the suction vacuum cleaner. 1872, The penny postcard was authorized by the U.S. Congress. 1904, U.S. Marines landed in Tangiers, Morocco, to protect U.S. citizens. 1915, U.S. Secretary of State William Jennings Bryan resigned in a disagreement over U.S. handling of the sinking of the Lusitania. 1934, The Cincinnati Reds became the first Major League team to use an airplane to travel from one city to another. They flew from Cincinnati to Chicago. 1947, "Lassie Show" debuted on ABC radio. It was a 15-minute show. 1953, The U.S. Supreme Court outlawed segregated restaurants in Washington, DC. 1965, U.S. troops in South Vietnam were given orders to begin fighting offensively. 1967, Israeli airplanes attacked the USS Liberty in the Mediterranean during the 6-Day War between Israel and its Arab neighbors. 34 U.S. Navy crewmen were killed. Israel later called the incident a tragic mistake due to the mis- identification of the ship. The U.S. has never publicly investigated the incident. 1969, U.S. President Richard Nixon met with President Thieu of South Vietnam to tell him 25,000 U.S. troops would pull out by August. 1978, A jury in Clark County, Nevada, ruled that the "Mormon will," was a forgery. The work was supposedly written by Howard Hughes. 1982, U.S. President Reagan became the first American chief executive to address a joint session of the British Parliament. 1987, Fawn Hill began testifying in the Iran-Contra hearings. She said that she had helped to shred some documents. 1988, The judge in the Iran-Contra conspiracy case ruled that Oliver North, John Poindexter, Richard Secord and Albert Hakim had to be tried separately. 1991, A victory parade was held in Washington, DC, to honor veterans of the Persian Gulf War. 1994, The warring factions in Bosnia agreed to a one-month cease-fire. 1995, U.S. Air Force pilot Captain Scott O'Grady was rescued by U.S. Marines after surviving alone in Bosnia after his F-16 fighter was shot down on June 2. 1996, China set off an underground nuclear test blast. 1998, The National Rifle Association elected Charlton Heston to be its president. 1998, In the U.S., the FTC brought an antitrust complaint against Intel Corp., alleging its policies punished other developers of microprocessor chips. 1998, Honda agreed to pay $17.1 million for disconnecting anti-pollution devices in 1.6 million cars. 1998, The space shuttle Discovery pulled away from Mir, ending America's three-year partnership with Russia. 2000, The Dallas Stars and the New Jersey Devils played the NHL's longest scoreless game in Stanley Cup finals history. The fifth game of the series lasted 106 minutes and 21 seconds. The game ended with a goal by Mike Madano that allowed the Stars to play a game six back in Dallas. 2001, Marc Chagall's painting "Study for 'Over Vitebsk" was stolen from the Jewish Museum in New York City. The 8x10 painting was valued at about $1 million. A group called the International Committee for Art and Peace later announced that they would return the painting after the Israelis and Palestinians made peace. 2004, Nate Olive and Sarah Jones began the first known continuous hike of the 1,800-mile trail down the U.S. Pacific Coast. They completed the trek at the U.S.-Mexico border on September 28. 2023, Do smiled.

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