Good Morning, Do! Thank you, Frank !!! Today is Tuesday, November 23 ___________________________________________________ If you can spare a coin, PLEASE hit PayPal with it! ___________________________________________________ Today's Bonehead Award: Christmas Parade Massacre driver arrested ___________________________________________________ Today, November 23 in 1948 Dr. Frank G. Back patented the "Zoomar" lens ____________________________________________________ A citizen of America will cross the ocean to fight for democracy, but won't cross the street to vote in a national election. --- Bill Vaughan It is a far, far better thing to have a firm anchor in nonsense than to put out on the troubled sea of thought. --- John Kenneth Galbraith ____________________________________________________ Little Johnny came home from a birthday party at a friends house. Knowing his sweet tooth, Johnny's mother looked straight into his eyes and said, "I hope you didn't ask for a second piece of cake." "No," replied Johnny. "I only asked Mrs. Smith for the recipe, so you could make a cake just as good, and she gave me two more pieces without me having to ask for them." ____________________________________________________  Laura ____________________________________________________ A doctor, an engineer, a rabbi and a politician were debating who was the world's first professional. The Doctor said "It must have been a doctor. Who else could have helped with the world's first surgery of taking a rib from Adam to create Eve, the first woman? "No," said the rabbi. "It must have been a rabbi, since the Lord needed someone to help preach his message to Adam and the world. "Wait," said the engineer. "The world was created in 6 days from nothing. Do you know what a master engineering feat that must have been to create the whole world into an orgnanized and reasonably civilized place from utter chaos?" "Yes, but who created the chaos?" asked the politician. ____________________________________________________ Reported by Rock  An INTERNATIONAL BONEHEAD AWARD has been earned by  Darrell Brooks, 39, Waukesha, Wisconsin, USA Christmas Parade Massacre driver arrested Darrell Brooks is in custody after the parade massacre Sunday in Waukesha, Wisconsin, police said. Five people were killed and more than 40 people were injured Sunday when a vehicle was driven into the Christmas parade, according to the Milwaukee Journal Sentinel. Darrell Brooks has a 44 page criminal history, and was a felon out on ridiculously negligible parole. It seems he was pushed out of jail in order to kill somebody, but then got interrupted and scared by the guards of whoever he was supposed to execute. The way he was driving was definitely not his style. He was driving as if he was being chased by the devil. You might have to ask Broom Hilda about who was scheduled to commit suicide. I have a hunch it is a female, who is currently guarded extremely well. I have no proof, of course. Mary Lemanski, the plastic face social media manager for the Democratic Party of DuPage County, Illinois, claimed the deadly Waukesha Christmas parade incident is karma, because the Rittenhouse judge did not follow HER advice. ____________________________________________________ If you can help with the cost of the Humor Letter, please donate what you can! ______________________________________________________ From: Jim Re: Should I Remove it Dear Webby this link works, but the download link on the resulting page does not work, as far as I can tell --- (from today's Dear Webby email): not that you can do anything about it --- just an FYI and, thanks! BTW, I found a link on Softpedia that worked --- (via search) Jim Dear Jim Looks like they have been taken over by the bad guys! You can still get it from the FileHorse: https://www.filehorse.com/download-should-i-remove-it/ AND your SoftPedia link. Have FUN! DearWebby
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_____________________________________________ Police was dispatched to an Ohio college campus this week to break up a fight involving two group of students, about 35 students total were involved. A group of black students saw what they thought were members of the KKK white supremacist organization parading around the campus. They took offense and proceeded to yell and throw empty bottles at them. A fight followed. It turned out that they were members of a campus fraternity that were going to a Halloween party dressed as the Pope and his entourage of Cardinals. That'll teach people not to wear "evil" costumes on Halloween. (Actually this happened a few years ago, but I repeat it now and then) ______________________________________________ A man walks up the counter and says, "I'll have 2 pounds of Tofu." The man at the counter says, "Oh, you must be from California." The man responds, "How stereotypical! If I had ordered Pepperoni would you think I was Italian?" "No." answers the man at the counter. And besides, pepperoni is more Sicilian than Italian. "If I had ordered Wienerschnitzel would you have thought I was German," he asks. "No." says the man behind the counter, "and besides, Wiener Schnitzel are from Wien, the capital of Austria." "Then why," he asks, "would you think I was from California, just because I want 2 pounds of tofu ???" The man looks up from the counter and says, "'Cause you're in a Home Depot hardware store." ______________________________________________  Ophelia Dingbatter's NewsNo sermon and not suitable for church, just jokes and fun for grownups. Read it on-line or subscribe. If you subscribe, look for the double opt-in confirmation request. |
When a mother saw a thunderstorm forming in mid- afternoon, she worried about her five-year-old daughter who would be walking the three blocks from kindergartenl to home. Deciding to meet her, the mother saw her walking nonchalantly along, stopping to smile whenever lightning flashed. Seeing her mother, the little girl ran to her, explaining happily, "All the way home, God's been taking my picture!" ___________________________________________________ Today, November 23, in 1765 Frederick County, MD, repudiated the British Stamp Act. 1835 Henry Burden patented the horseshoe manufacturing machine. 1889 The first jukebox made its debut in San Francisco, at the Palais Royale Saloon. 1890 Princess Wilhelmina became Queen of the Netherlands at the age of 10 when her father William III died. 1936 The first edition of "Life" was published. 1943 During World War II, U.S. forces seized control of Tarawa and Makin from the Japanese during the Central Pacific offensive in the Gilbert Islands. 1945 The U.S. wartime rationing of most foods ended. 1948 Dr. Frank G. Back patented the "Zoomar" lens. 1946 Mound Metalcraft changed its name to Tonka Toys Incorporated. 1961 The Dominican Republic changed the name of its capital from Ciudad Trujillo to Santo Domingo. 1971 The People's Republic of China was seated in the United Nations Security Council. 1979 In Dublin, Ireland, Thomas McMahon was sentenced to life imprisonment for the assassination of Earl Mountbatten. 1980 In southern Italy, approximately 4,800 people were killed in a series of earthquakes. 1983 The first Pershing II missiles were deployed in West Germany. In response, the U.S.S.R. broke off International Nuclear Forces (INF) talks in Geneva. 1985 Larry Wu-tai Chin, a retired CIA analyst, was arrested and accused of spying for China. He committed suicide a year after his conviction. 1985 Gunmen hijacked an Egyptian jetliner en route from Athens to Cairo. The plane was forced to land in Malta. 1986 In Manila, President Aquino dismissed Defense Minister Enrile. 1988 Wayne Gretzky scored his 600th National Hockey League (NHL) goal. 1989 Lucia Barrera de Cerna, a housekeeper who claimed she had witnessed the slaying of six Jesuit priests and two other people at the Jose Simeon Canas University in El Salvador, was flown to the U.S. 1991 Yugoslavia's rival leaders agreed to a new cease-fire, the 14th of the Balkan civil war. 1994 About 111 people, mostly women and children, were killed in a stampede after Indian police baton-charged tribal protesters in the western city of Nagpur. 1995 Charles Rathbun, free-lance photographer, was booked in Hermosa Beach, CA, for investigation of murder in the disappearance of model Linda Sobek. He was later convicted. 1998 Dennis Rodman filed for an annulment from Carmen Electra. The two had been married on November 14, 1998. 1998 The tobacco industry signed the biggest U.S. civil settlement. It was a $206-billion deal to resolve remaining state claims for treating sick smokers. 1998 A U.S. federal judge rejected a Virginia county's effort to block pornography on library computer calling the attempt unconstitutional. 2001 A crowd of 87,555 people watched the Texas Longhorns beat the Texas A&M Aggies 21-7. The crowd was the largest to see a football game in Texas. 2010 North Korea shelled Yeonpyeong Island. 2021 Do smiled. |
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