Dear Webby's Humor Letter
widely read, forwarded, copied and imitated daily since 1994
Dear Webby's Humor Letter, daily since 1994
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  Good Morning, Do! Today is Thursday, October 14 ___________________________________________________ If you can spare a coin, PLEASE hit PayPal with it! ___________________________________________________  Today's Bonehead Award: Man arrested for attacking people, cars with baseball bat  ___________________________________________________ Today, October 14 in 1962 The Cuban Missile Crisis began. It was on this day that U.S. intelligence personnel analyzing data discovered Soviet medium-range missile sites in Cuba. On October 22 U.S. President John F. Kennedy announced that he had ordered the naval "quarantine" of Cuba. ____________________________________________________ Men live in a fantasy world. I know this because I am one, and I actually receive my mail there. --- Scott Adams (1957 - ) If you're going through hell, keep going. --- Sir Winston Churchil Fools rush in where fools have been before. --- Socratex ____________________________________________________ A Texan was visiting a Maine farmer ("fahmah"). The Texas rancher was boasting to his host about the size of his spread: "I can get into my pickup truck and drive all day and still not reach the boundary of my ranch", he bragged. The Mainer shook his head knowingly, and replyed, "Aayuhh, I had a truck like that once" ____________________________________________________ The young bride's mother had some old- fashioned ideas of marriage, and passed them on to her daughter. "Never let your husband see you in the nude," she advised. "You should always wear something." "Yes, mother," replied the obedient girl. Two weeks after the wedding, the girl and her brand-new husband were preparing to retire when the guy asked, "Dear, has there ever been any insanity in your family?" "Not that I know of," she answered. "Why?" "Well, we've been married for two weeks now and every night you've worn that silly hat to bed." ____________________________________________________   ____________________________________________________ The local priest came across Paddy who had stumbled out of the town tavern. "Paddy," he said, "I'm afraid I'll not be seeing you in Heaven one day." "Really, Father?" slurred Paddy. "What have you done now?" ____________________________________________________ Reported by Rock An INTERNATIONAL BONEHEAD AWARD has been earned by  Wesley Abeita, Scottsdale, Arizona, USA  Man arrested for attacking people, cars with baseball bat  Officials with the Scottsdale Police Department say they have arrested a man after he allegedly attacked people and vehicles at a trailhead on Monday. According to a tweet made by the department, Wesley Abeita was arrested on Oct. 12. "He has been booked on numerous charges, including Attempted 2nd Degree Murder, Aggravated Assault, and Criminal Damage," read a portion of the tweet. According to police, Abeita allegedly attacked people and vehicles with a baseball bat at the Gateway Trailhead, which is located near Bell Road and Thompson Peak Parkway. The incident reportedly happened during the evening hours of Oct. 11. Police officials accuse Abeita of attacking parked vehicles and a woman while she was seated in her parked car. "Witnesses attempted to stop the assault by throwing rocks at Abeita, who then turned on them and attacked their vehicle, which forced them to flee for their own safety. Abeita was gone when officers arrived," read a portion of a statement released by Scottsdale Police. The female victim, according to police, was taken to the hospital by family members. She suffered serious injuries. Abeita, according to police, was seen at the trailhead parking lot on the morning of Oct. 12. He allegedly admitted to a Scottsdale city employee of burglarizing a city vehicle parked in the area. Police later took Abeita into custody at around 8:20 a.m.  ____________________________________________________ If you can help with the cost of the Humor Letter, please donate what you can! ______________________________________________________  From: Olga Re: World time zones Dear Webby, I have friends all over the world and need a map to show me what time zones they have. Olga  Dear Olga The clearest map seems to be at TimeTemperature Scroll down for all kinds of time tools. Have FUN! DearWebby 
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 Two gas company servicemen, a senior training supervisor and a young trainee, were out checking meters in a suburban neighborhood. They parked their truck at the end of the alley and worked their way to the other end. At the last house a woman looking out her kitchen window watched the two men as they checked her gas meter. Finishing the meter check, the senior supervisor challenged his younger coworker to a foot race down the alley back to the truck to prove that an older guy could outrun a younger one. As they came running up to the truck, they realized the lady from that last house was huffing and puffing right behind them. They stopped and asked her what was wrong. Gasping for breath, she replied, "When I see two gas men running as hard as you two were, I figured I'd better run too!" ______________________________________________ A minister was planning a wedding at the close of the Sunday morning service. After the benediction he had planned to call the couple down to be married for a brief ceremony before the congregation. For the life of him, he couldn't think of the names of those who were to be married. "Will those wanting to get married please come to the front?" he requested. Immediately, nine single ladies, six widows and two single men stepped to the front. ______________________________________________ 
Ophelia Dingbatter's NewsNo sermon and not suitable for church, just jokes and fun for grownups. Read it on-line or subscribe. If you subscribe, look for the double opt-in confirmation request.
Adam and Eve must have had a great marriage. Adam couldn't talk about his Mother's cooking, and Eve couldn't mention all the men she could/should have married. ___________________________________________________
 Today, October 14, in 1066 The Battle of Hastings occurred in England. The Norman forces of William the Conqueror defeated King Harold II of England. 1879 Thomas Edison signed an agreement with Jose D. Husbands for the sale of Edison telephones in Chile. 1887 Thomas Edison and George E. Gouraud reached an agreement for the international marketing rights for the phonograph. 1888 In England, Louis Le Prince filmed the experimental film "Roundhay Garden Scene." It is the oldest surviving motion picture. 1912 Theodore Roosevelt was shot while campaigning in Milwaukee, WI. Roosevelt's wound in the chest was not serious and he continued with his planned speech. William Schrenk was captured at the scene of the shooting. 1922 Lieutenant Lester James Maitland set a new airplane speed record when he reached a speed of 216.1 miles-per- hour. 1926 The book "Winnie-the-Pooh," by A.A. Milne, made its debut. 1928 The first televised wedding took place in Des Plains, IL. James Fowlkes and Cora Dennison were married in a radio studio. 1933 Nazi Germany announced that it was withdrawing from the League of Nations. 1936 The first SSB (Social Security Board) office opened in Austin, TX. From this point, the Board's local office took over the assigning of Social Security Numbers. 1944 German Field Marshal Erwin Rommel committed suicide rather than face execution after being accused of conspiring against Adolf Hitler and the execution that would follow. 1944 During World War II, the Second British Parachute Brigade liberated the city of Athens. 1947 Over Rogers Dry Lake in Southern California, pilot Chuck Yeager flew the Bell X-1 rocket plane and became the first American to break the sound barrier. 1954 C.B. DeMille's "The Ten Commandments", starring Charlton Heston, began filming in Egypt. The epic had a cast of 25,000 people. 1962 The Cuban Missile Crisis began. It was on this day that U.S. intelligence personnel analyzing data discovered Soviet medium-range missile sites in Cuba. On October 22 U.S. President John F. Kennedy announced that he had ordered the naval "quarantine" of Cuba. 1964 Dr. Martin Luther King, Jr. was awarded the Nobel Peace Prize for his non-violent resistance to racial prejudice in America. He was the youngest person to receive the award. 1968 The first live telecast to come from a manned U.S. spacecraft was transmitted from Apollo 7. 1970 Anwar el-Sadat became president of Egypt following the death of President Nasser. 1972 In Iraq, oil was struck for the first time just north of Kirkuk. 1986 Soviet leader Mikhail S. Gorbachev charged that the U.S. wanted to "bleed the Soviet Union economically" with the arms race in space. 1987 Jessica McClure, 18 months old, fell down an abandoned well in Midland, TX. The rescue took 58 hours. 2002 Britain stripped power from the Catholic and Protestant politicians of Northern Ireland. Britain resumed sole responsibility for running Northern Ireland. 2021 Do smiled. 

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