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Bonehead Bonehead went on shooting rampage in Philadelphia ___________________________________________________ Q It is a profitable thing, if one is wise, to seem foolish. --- Aeschylus (525 BC - 456 BC) The difference between genius and stupidity is that genius has its limits. --- Socratex __________________________________________________ Here is a Classic: I gaze at the brilliant moon. The same one, I think to myself, at which Socrates, Aristotle, and Plato gazed. Suddenly, I imagine they appear beside me. I tell Socrates about the national debate over one's right to die and wonder at the constancy of the human condition. I tell Plato that I live in the country that has come closest to Utopia and I show him a copy of the Constitution. I tell Aristotle that we have found many more than four basic elements and I show him a periodic table. Then I get a box of kitchen matches and strike one. They gasp with wonder. We spend the rest of the night lighting farts. ___________________________________________________ If you can help with the cost of the Humor Letter, please donate what you can! ___________________________________________________ OregonFireOpal-.jpg Oregon Fire Opal ___________________________________________________ Husband: "This coffee isn't fit for a pig!" Wife: "No problem. I'll get you some that is." ________________________________________________ A Bonehead award has been reported by Rock Kimbrady Carriker, 40, PHILADELPHIA, USA Bonehead went on shooting rampage in Philadelphia Kimbrady Carriker known as a gun obsessed BLM activist. The brother of a young man who was killed in a mass shooting in Philadelphia said his brother had just stepped outside to go to the store when he was fatally shot. "Just walked out of the house, I guess [the shooter] was right there and shot him twice," Dominque Evans said. "It's just sad, this is stuff you see on TV, not real life, that's why I'm so shocked." Lashyd Merritt was one of five people who were gunned down Monday night when police say a lone gunman armed with a rifle and a handgun began his murderous rampage at 56th and Chester. The 40-year-old shooter, identified by police sources as Kimbrady Carriker, is accused of firing "aimlessly" at both occupied vehicles and people on the street. "He was simply trying to go to the store to get something to eat," Dreyanna Burnett, Merritt's girlfriend, said. "I had just got off the phone with him, and he was on break from work." Police believe the first victim, 31-year-old Joseph Wamah Jr., was killed inside a house on South 56th Street. A 2-year-old boy was in the backseat of his mom's car when he was hit by gunfire. Officers from the Philadelphia Police Department were first flagged down around 8:30 p.m. near the intersection of 56th and Chester streets where they found several gunshot victims. Police continued to hear gunfire on nearby streets and eventually caught up with the suspect on the 1600 block of Frazer Street where he surrendered in a back alley. "He was still shooting as we were scooping up humans, police were there and started running up to the scene," said Theo James who witnessed part of Monday night's carnage. Investigators say the shooter was wearing a ski mask and body armor, and had a police scanner with him when he was taken into custody. "What happened last night in our Kingsessing neighborhood was unimaginably disgusting and horrifying on what was supposed to be a beautiful summer evening," Commissioner Outlaw said. Less than 24-hours later, police publicly identified the victims who range in age from 15 to 59: Daujan Brown, 15, Lashyd Merritt, 20, Dymir Stanton, 29, Joseph Wamah Jr., 31, Ralph Moralis, 59. Police are combing through evidence, including a leaked video purporting to show part of the shooting, to discover what may have lead to the shooting. ___________________________________________________ Anyone who's ever ridden in a cab in Washington DC knows they're some of the world's most brazen drivers. Oddly enough though, their current accident rate isn't all that bad. I asked one of the drivers one day the reason for that. "Easy," he said. "all the really bad drivers are dead now." __________________________________________________ A man went to the doctor complaining of insomnia. The doctor gave him a thorough examination, found absolutely nothing physically wrong with him, and then told him, "Listen, if you ever expect to cure your insomnia, you just have to stop taking your trouble to bed with you." "I know" said the man, "but I can't. Until snow plowing season starts and more money comes in, I can't afford a divorce!" ___________________________________________________ Thanks to Betty on Vancouver Island for this: Betty's Fire Lilies ___________________________________________________ Sandra was trying on an EXTREMELY low cut dress. As she studied herself in the mirror, she asked Cindy if she thought it was too low cut. Cindy: "Do you have hair on your chest?" Sandra "No -- certainly NOT!!!" Cindy "Then it's too low cut." ___________________________________________________ From:Vin Re: Unwanted tool bars Dear Webby Every program I install seems to come with some silly toolbar that has maybe one icon on it that I use and half a dozen that are totally useless. If they have so little confidence in their program that they feel they have to provide an UN- install icon on prime, easy to get to, toolbar space, why sell it in the first place? How can I restrict all those silly toolbars to just one icon? Vin Dear Vin You can't. Just delete all those silly little toolbars. Make desktop shortcuts to the programs that you need, then make a desktop folder and drag them in there. Next you drag that folder into a subdirectory, and make one desktop shortcut icon for that. That way YOU control which icons are taking up space. Good Luck! DearWebby ___________________________________________________________ Jill chewed out her husband at the company Thanksgiving picnic. "Doesn't it embarrass you that people have seen you go up to the buffet table five times?" "Not a bit," the husband replied. "I tell them I'm just filling up the plate for you!" ___________________________________________________ If you can spare a coin, PLEASE hit PayPal with it! _____________________________________________________ Two confirmed bachelors sat talking. Their conversation drifted from politics to cooking. "I got a cookbook once," said the first, "but I could never do anything with it." "Too much fancy cooking in it, eh?" asked the second. "You said it. Every one of the recipes was limited to women and began the same way - 'Take a clean dish and....'" __________________________________________________ If you can help with the cost of the humor letter, please donate what you can! If you like my work,please donate a dollar, or two, if you can afford it! Please, help me stay online! __________________________________________________ History Today July 6, in 1483, King Richard III of England was crowned. 1699, Captain William Kidd, the pirate, was captured in Boston, MA, and deported back to England. 1777, British forces captured Fort Ticonderoga during the American Revolution. 1854, In Jackson, MI, the Republican Party held its first convention. 1858, Lyman Blake patented the shoe manufacturing machine. 1885, Louis Pasteur successfully tested his anti-rabies vaccine. The child used in the test later became the director of the Pasteur Institute. 1905, Fingerprints were exchanged for the first time between officials in Europe and the U.S. The person in question was John Walker. 1917, During World War I, Arab forces led by T.E. Lawrence captured the port of Aqaba from the Turks. 1919, A British dirigible landed in New York at Roosevelt Field. It completed the first crossing of the Atlantic Ocean by an airship. 1923, The Union of Soviet Socialist Republics was established. 1928, "The Lights of New York" was previewed in New York's Strand Theatre. It was the first all-talking movie. 1932, The postage rate for first class mail in the U.S. went from 2-cents to 3-cents. 1933, The first All-Star baseball game was held in Chicago. The American League beat the National League 4-2. 1942, Diarist Anne Frank and her family took refuge from the Nazis in Amsterdam. 1945, U.S. President Truman signed an order creating the Medal of Freedom. 1945, Nicaragua became the first nation to formally accept the United Nations Charter. 1947, "Candid Microphone" began airing on ABC radio. 1948, Frieda Hennok became the first woman to serve as the commissioner of the Federal Communications Commission. 1957, Althea Gibson won the Wimbledon women's singles tennis title. She was the first black athlete to win the event. 1966, Malawi became a republic within the Commonwealth with Dr. Hastings Banda as its first president. 1967, The Biafran War erupted. The war lasted two-and-a-half years. About 600,000 people died. 1981, Former President of Argentina Isabel Peron was freed after five years of house arrest by a federal court. 1981, The Dupont Company announced an agreement to purchase Conoco, Inc. (Continental Oil Co.) for $7 billion. At the time it was the largest merger in corporate history. 1983, The U.S. Supreme Court ruled that retirement plans could not pay women smaller monthly payments solely because of their gender. 1985, Martina Navratilova won her 4th consecutive Wimbledon singles title. 1985, The submarine Nautilus arrived in Groton, Connecticut. The vessel had been towed from Mare Island Naval Shipyard. 1988, Several popular beaches were closed in New York City due to medical waste and other debris began washing up on the seashores. 1989, The U.S. Army destroyed its last Pershing 1-A missiles at an ammunition plant in Karnack, TX. The dismantling was under the terms of the 1987 Intermediate-range Nuclear Forces Treaty. 1996, Steffi Graf won her seventh Wimbledon title. 1997, The Mars Pathfinder released Sojourner, a robot rover on the surface of Mars. The spacecraft landed on the red planet on July 4th. 1997, In Cambodia, Second Prime Minister Hun Sen ousted First Prime Minister Norodom Ranariddh and claimed to have the capital under his control. 1998, Protestants rioted in many parts of Northern Ireland after British authorities blocked an Orange Order march in Portadown. 2000, A jury awarded former NHL player Tony Twist $24 million for the unauthorized use of his name in the comic book Spawn and the HBO cartoon series. Co-defendant HBO settled with Twist out of court for an undisclosed amount. 2023, Do smiled.

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