Good Morning, Do, Today is Wednesday, December 27 Have FUN! Dearwebby Todays Bonehead Award: Fugitive arrested when he tried to rob Newark airport store  Bonehead ______________________________________________________ Today, December 27 in 1845 Dr. Crawford Williamson-Long used anesthesia for childbirth for the first time. The event was the delivery of his own child in Jefferson, GA.  See More of what happened on this day in history.
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 ______________________________________________________ "More Americans can name the three stooges than the three branches of government. Well, that's because the three stooges are more likely to get something done." --- David Letterman ______________________________________________________ If you like the Humor Letter, please vote!  ______________________________________________________ One Sunday in a Midwest city, a young child was "acting up" during the morning worship hour. The parents did their best to maintain some sense of order in the pew, but were losing the battle. Finally, the father picked the little fellow up and walked sternly up the aisle on his way out. Just before reaching the safety of the foyer, the little one called loudly to the congregation, "Pray for me! Pray for me!" _____________________________________________________ The new Supermarket near our house has an automatic water mister to keep the produce fresh. Just before it goes on, you hear the sound of distant thunder and the smell of fresh rain. When you approach the milk cases, you hear cows mooing and witness the scent of fresh hay. When you approach the egg case, you hear hens cluck and cackle and the air is filled with the pleasing aroma of bacon and eggs frying. The veggie department features the smell of fresh buttered corn. I don't buy toilet paper there any more. _____________________________________________________   ______________________________________________________   ____________________________________ 
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 _____________________________________________________ Our five-year-old grandson couldn't wait to tell his grand- father about the movie we had watched on television, "20,000 Leagues Under the Sea." The scenes with the submarine and the giant octopus had kept him wide-eyed. In the middle of the telling, my husband interrupted Mark, "What made the submarine sink, was it the octopus?" With a look of incredulity Mark replied, "No, Grampa, it was the 20,000 leaks!" _____________________________________________________ An INTERNATIONAL BONEHEAD AWARD has been earned by  Ernesto Rodriguez-Zazueta, 46, Newark, NJ  Fugitive arrested when he tried to rob Newark airport store  One man was taken into custody Friday morning when he tried to rob an electronics store in Newark Airport, authorities said. Ernesto Rodriguez-Zazueta, 46, who authorities said was a fugitive from the Drug Enforcement Agency, was arrested by Port Authority Police inside the airport. Rodriguez-Zazueta allegedly entered a Blue Wire Electronics store in Terminal C of Newark Airport Friday around 7 a.m., authorities said. He went behind the counter, and used a pen to mimic a weapon while demanding cash from a shop worker, they said. The worker struggled with Rodriguez-Zazueta, but was able to call Port Authority Police. Officers apprehended and arrested Rodriguez-Zazueta. One officer sustained minor injuries while in a struggle with Rodriguez-Zazueta, but was quickly treated, authorities said. During processing, police said Rodriguez-Zazueta gave several false names before officers discovered his true identity. Records show that Rodriguez-Zazueta was the subject of a federal arrest warrant for illegal drug sales, and was listed on the DEA's most wanted list. The report was filed by St. Louis DEA officials, but Rodriguez-Zazueta's last listed address was in Norfolk, Nebraska. Rodriguez-Zazueta was charged with robbery, resisting arrest and for hindering apprehension.  _________________________________  Tech Support Pits From: Eddie Re: Using my PC for a Fax machine Dear Webby, I have "Windows 10".... So can it work? and how much does this cost? Eddie  Dear Eddie All it will cost you is reading the instructions. You got the Fax already included in w10 and just have to set it up. It acts just like a printer. When you hit CTRL P to print, then you select FAX instead of the regular printer. If, for some reason, your built in fax does not work, or if you dont have a spare connection to your phone line, then browse to https://faxzero.com/ You can use that from anywhere, even if you dont have access to a phone line, for example if you are using the WiFi at the donut shop. You can send 5 pages for free, and a small nominal fee, ($1,99) for 25 pages. I have used https://faxzero.com/ for many years. Never any problem, as long as the recipient has paper in their fax machine. I use them mainly because I dont like receiving junk faxes, which is a real problem when you have a business number. So I dont have Winfax set up or even a phone line connected to the computer. For the few faxes I send, FaxZero is the perfect solution. Have FUN! DearWebby   
Automatically move ALL your settings and programs. No need to re-install them. The only mover recommended by Intel and Microsoft.  Three retirees, each with a hearing loss, were playing golf one fine day. One remarked to the other, "Windy, isn't it?" "No," the second man, replied, "it's Thursday." The third man chimed in, "So am I. Let's have a beer." 
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 A couple drove several miles down a country road, not saying a word. An earlier discussion had led to an argument, and neither wanted to concede their position. As they passed a barnyard of mules and pigs, the wife sarcastically asked, "Relatives of yours?" "Yep," the husband replied, "In-laws." ____________________________________________________  Daily tip from Thriftyfun.com Italian Vermicelli Soup By suz1230 [8 Posts, 20 Comments] There's nothing like a hot bowl of beefy soup when it's cold outside. This is one of those soups that are really fail safe in that you can't really hurt it if you don't follow the directions exactly. Prep Time: 20 min approx Cook Time: 2 and 1/2 hrs approx. Total Time: Start to finish about 2.5 hrs-3hrs Ingredients: 3-4 lb chuck roast 2-3 Tbsp oil (to sear the chuck roast) 3/4 cup chopped white or yellow onion 2-3 leaves bay leaves 1/4 tsp salt or to taste preference 1/4-1/3 tsp pepper 1/4-3/4 tsp Italian seasoning 2-4 cubes beef bouillon 4-5 cups water 1/2 lb spaghetti pasta or Vermicelli pasta 1 can petite diced tomatoes Steps: Sear the chuck roast meat. You want a really good sear on both sides. Almost to the point where you think its going to burn it, but don't burn it. Cook at a medium high heat about 7ish minutes on each side. You'll know when it's super browned you've got that great sear. Coarsely chop your onion while the chuck roast is searing. When the meat is seared real good on both sides, throw your chopped onion into the same pot. Cook the onion on the medium high heat with your meat until the onions are caramelized slightly. Pour in your water and spices. Turn the heat down to the lowest simmer and put on a lid. The meat with the water and spices are going to now cook for 2-3 hrs, depending on when the meat is tender to your preference. Check the pot about every 45 min to an hour or so, because you may need to add 1/8 of a cup of water to it in a hour to an hour and a half, as it will reduce. In another pot cook your pasta, then drain it and just put a little oil on it, as to keep it from sticking together, and stir that around in the pot it cooked in just to get the pasta "oiled very very lightly", as you'll be adding that to the beef stock when the meat is done cooking. When the meat is done to your desired tenderness (mine was about 2.5 hrs), then turn off the pot of stock and using a meat fork, remove the meat from the pot so you can cut or tear it up into bite size pieces. Now add your cooked and drained pasta back into the beef stock. Now add your cut or torn up Chuck roast back into the pot with the stock and pasta. Add the diced tomatoes and a touch of salt and pepper on top of all that. Now it's ready. Tip provided by Thriftyfun.com font>  For the busy bachelor version you can use Italian or Farmer sausage for the meat cut in half lengthwise and then sliced. Sear it with the onion. Go ahead and just use the whole onion. Add a teaspoon of Minsestrone soup powder from the Bulk Barn instead of the oxo cubes. For the pasta, when done, "scare it" with a cup of cold water to make it non-stick, just like the Italian chefs do, before you tip it into the colander. For the tomatoes I use "stewed tomatoes", unless I have a fresh one handy. Either way, the tomatoes need to be stired in and simmered for a few minutes to get the real Italian flavor going. I usually have leftovers for the next day and simply add veggies. Have FUN! DearWebby  ____________________________________________________  Thanks to Maria for this story: A man is traveling with his wife and mother-in-law in a far east country. At a place of honor, his mother-in-law makes a careless remark, which the native people take as an insult to the royal family. The man is dragged off to court with his wife and mother- in-law and are sentenced to corporal punishment. Each of them are to receive 50 lashes on the rear end with a cane. But because the royal family doesn't want to appear hostile to foreigners, they grant the guests in their country a wish beforehand, as long as it can be fulfilled. The man's wife is first and she requests that a pillow be bound to her rear end before the lashings. The wish is granted, but because the pillow is too small, and the executioner also hits her back a couple of times, she receives a few blows. Next it is the man's mother-in-law's turn. Since she saw what happened to her daughter, she requests a pillow to be bound on her rear end and a pillow be bound on her back before the lashings. The mother in law's wish is granted and she receives her fifty lashes, but hardly feels the pain through the pillows. Then it is the man's turn, and he tells the leader of the royal family, "I have two wishes. Do you want to fulfill them for me?" The leader says, "Because you are a guest in our country, we want to fulfill your wishes for you, as long as they are reasonable." So, the man says, "I would like a hundred lashes instead of fifty." The executioner is surprised, but says, "Yes, that is a pious wish, it shall be granted to you. And what is your second wish?" And the man says, "I would like to have my mother-in-law bound to my back."  
 
The beautifully painted Monasteries of Romania. It's amazing to me what colorful paintings ancient men did without the modern paints we have today. 
 To get acquainted with his new Parish, the Priest decided to call on some members daily. One he selected was a young widow, her husband, according to the index card, had died two years ago. After knocking at the door, he was greeted by a young lady with a baby in her arms. He said, "I'm sorry, I must have the wrong address, I was looking for the widow Laffitte." "You've found her Father." smiled the lady. "Well, according to the card here, it says your husband died over two years ago." he said glancing at the baby in her arms. "That's correct Father, he surely did... but I didn't." ___________________________________________________ 
 Ophelia Dingbatter's NewsNo sermon and not suitable for church, just jokes and fun for grownups. Read it on-line or subscribe. If you subscribe, look for the double opt-in confirmation request. 
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 Today, December 27, in 1703 The Methuen Treaty was signed between Portugal and England, giving preference to the import of Portuguese wines into England. 1831 Charles Darwin set out on a voyage to the Pacific aboard the HMS Beagle. Darwin's discoveries during the voyage helped him form the basis of his theories on evolution. 1845 Dr. Crawford Williamson Long used anesthesia for childbirth for the first time. The event was the delivery of his own child in Jefferson, GA. 1900 Carrie Nation staged her first raid on a saloon at the Carey Hotel in Wichita, KS. She broke each and every one of the liquor bottles that could be seen. 1904 James Barrie's play "Peter Pan" premiered in London. 1927 Leon Trotsky was expelled from the Communist Party. 1938 The first skimobile course in America opened in North Conway, NH. 1945 The World Bank was created with an agreement signed by 28 nations. 1947 The children's television program "Howdy Doody," hosted by Bob Smith, made its debut on NBC. 1949 Queen Juliana of the Netherlands granted sovereignty to Indonesia after more than 300 years of Dutch rule. 1951 In Cincinnati, OH, a Crosley automobile, with a steering wheel on the right side, became the first vehicle of its kind to be placed in service for mail delivery. 1965 The BP oil rig Sea Gem capsized in the North Sea, with the loss of 13 lives. 1978 Spain adopted a new constitution and became a democracy after 40 years of dictatorship. 1979 Soviet forces seized control of Afghanistan. Babrak Karmal succeeded President Hafizullah Amin, who was overthrown and executed. 1985 Palestinian guerrillas opened fire inside the Rome and Vienna airports. A total of twenty people were killed, including five of the attackers, who were slain by police and security personnel. 1985 Dian Fossey, an American naturalist, was found murdered at a research station in Rawanda. 1992 The U.S. shot down an Iraqi fighter jet during what the Pentagon described as a confrontation between a pair of Iraqi warplanes and U.S. F-16 jets in U.N.-restricted airspace over southern Iraq. 1996 Muslim fundamentalist Taliban forces retook the strategic air base of Bagram, solidifying their buffer zone around Kabul, the Afghanistan capital. 1997 In Northern Ireland, Billy Wright was assassinated. He was imprisoned as a Protestant paramilitary leader. 2000 Mario Lemeiux (Pittsburgh Penguins) returned to the National Hockey League (NHL) as a player after over 3 years of retirement. He was the first owner-player in the modern era of pro sports. Lemieux had purchased the Pittsburgh Penguins during his retirement from playing. 2001 U.S. President George W. Bush granted China permanent normal trade status with the United States. 2002 North Korea ordered U.N. nuclear inspectors to leave the country and said that it would restart a laboratory capable of producing plutonium for nuclear weapons. 2002 Clonaid announced the birth of the first cloned human baby. The baby had been born December 26. 2002 In Chechnya, at least 40 people were killed when suicide bombers attacked the administartion of Grozny. 2017 Do smiled. 
 
 

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