Good Morning, Do! Today is Wednesday, December 23 ___________________________________________________ If you can spare a coin, PLEASE hit PayPal with it! ___________________________________________________ International Bonehead Award Priest faces federal child pornography charges ___________________________________________________ Today, December 23 in 1947 John Bardeen, Walter H. Brattain and William Shockley invented the transistor. _____________________________________________________ Women need a reason to have sex. Men just need a place. --- Billy Crystal (1947 - ) _____________________________________________________ A man was wandering around a fairground and he happened to see a fortune-tellers tent. Thinking it would be good for a laugh, he went inside and sat down. "Ah....." said the woman as she gazed into her crystal ball. "I see you are the father of two children." "That's what you think", said the man scornfully. I'm the father of THREE children." The woman grinned and said, "That's what YOU think!" _____________________________________________________   Morning stretch of the Great Egret ___________________________________________________ There was a Sunday school in Nebraska with thriteen children between the ages 4 to 5 yrs old. When the Sunday school teacher asked everyone to raise their hand if they wanted to go to heaven. Twelve of the chidren raised their hand, all except for four year old Johnny. When the Sunday school teacher asked: "Johnny, don't you want to go to Heaven?" Johnny looked around at everyone and replied: Not if this bunch is going." ___________________________________________________ Reported by Rock An INTERNATIONAL BONEHEAD AWARD has been earned by  William McCandless, 56, Wilmington, Delaware, USA  Priest faces federal child pornography charges  A Catholic priest from Wilmington, Delaware, who served as an advisor to Monoco's royal family now faces federal child pornography charges. Reverend William McCandless is accused of collecting thousands of child pornography images while serving overseas, then returning home with them. The 56-year-old was placed on home confinement and ordered to surrender his passport. McCandless also once served as principal of the Salesianum School in Wilmington and held a post at DeSales University.  
 DearWebby's Tech Support Pits  From: Sally Re: What to use instead of flash  Dear Webby, I agree that it is a good idea to never use flash, but what do I use for dark situations, like my kids and my parents around the Christmas tree, and the only light a bunch of candles? Sally  Dear Sally Go to Home Depot and get a Quartz work light like this:  Mine cost $12 a few years ago. They have all kinds, some even with head high tripods. Take your pick. Set it up so that it is positioned an arms length to the side of you, and an arms length higher than the camera for the most flattering light. Even though a quartz light seems cold and white, on pictures it is considerably warmer than the built in camera flash. The big alligator clamp is for attaching it to a shelf or step ladder, and to threaten kids, who want to get too close. Have FUN! DearWebby 
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 After doing the laundry, Lena folded Ole's underwear and put them in his dresser. The following morning, Ole took out a pair. Shaking the powder out, he grumbled, "Doggone it, Lena, I wish you wouldn't put so much laundry powder in my underwear." Grinning sheepishly, Lena replied, "Oh, Ole, that's not laundry powder..it's Miracle-Gro!" ____________________________________________ A cashier In the grocery store held up a small dairy carton and yelled to an older co-worker, "How much is half-and-half?" Without a moment's hesitation and in a very patient voice, the other cashier replied, "One." ____________________________________________ Home computers are being called upon to perform many new functions, including the consumption of homework formerly eaten by the dog. --- Doug Larson ____________________________________________ 
 Ophelia Dingbatter's NewsNo sermon and not suitable for church, just jokes and fun for grownups. Read it on-line or subscribe. If you subscribe, look for the double opt-in confirmation request. 
 ___________________________________________________  
 Today December 23 in 1783 George Washington returned home to Mount Vernon, after the disbanding of his army following the Revolutionary War. 1788 Maryland voted to cede a 100-square-mile area for the seat of the national government. About two-thirds of the area became the District of Columbia. 1823 The poem "A Visit from St. Nicholas" by Clement C. Moore (" 'Twas the night before Christmas...") was published. 1834 English architect Joseph Hansom patented his 'safety cab', better known as the Hansom cab. 1856 Ralph Collier was issued a U.S. patent for the first rotary egg beater with rotating parts. 1880 Thomas Edison incorporated the Edison Electric Light Company of Europe. 1888 Following a quarrel with Paul Gauguin, Dutch painter Vincent Van Gogh cut off part of his own earlobe. 1893 The Engelbert Humperdinck opera "Hansel und Gretel" was first performed, in Weimar, Germany. 1913 The Federal Reserve Bill was signed into law by U.S. President Woodrow Wilson. The act established 12 Federal Reserve Banks. 1919 The first ship designed to be used as an ambulance for the transport patients was launched. The hospital ship was named USS Relief and had 515 beds. 1922 The British Broadcasting Corporation began daily news broadcasts. 1930 Ruth Elizabeth Davis, an unknown actress, arrived in Hollywood, under contract to Universal Studios. Universal changed her name to Bette Davis for the movies. 1941 During World War II, American forces on Wake Island surrendered to the Japanese. 1942 Bob Hope agreed to entertain U.S. airmen in Alaska. It was the first of the traditional Christmas shows. 1943 "Hansel and Gretel," the opera, was televised on New York's WRBG. It was the first complete opera to be televised. 1947 John Bardeen, Walter H. Brattain and William Shockley invented the transistor. 1948 Former Japanese premier Hideki Tojo and six other Japanese war leaders were executed in Tokyo. They had been found guilty of crimes against humanity. 1953 Soviet secret police chief Lavrenti Beria and six of his associates were shot for treason following a secret trial. 1954 The Walt Disney movie "20,000 Leagues Under the Sea" was released. 1965 A 70-mph speed limit was introduced in Britain. 1968 The crew of the U.S. Navy ship, Pueblo, was released by North Korea. The Captain of the Pueblo, Commander Lloyd M. Bucher, and 82 of his crew were held for 11 months after the ship was seized by North Korea because of suspected spying by the Americans. 1970 In New York, the topping out ceremony for original One World Trade Center (North Tower) took place. The South Tower's ceremony took place on July 19, 1971. 1981 NASA approved a plan to continue the Voyager II spacecraft on a trajectory that would take it within 66,000 miles of Uranus on July 24, 1986. 1986 The experimental airplane Voyager, piloted by Dick Rutan and Jeana Yeager, completed the first non-stop, around-the-world flight without refueling as it landed safely at Edwards Air Force Base in California. 1987 Lynette "Squeaky" Fromme, serving a life sentence for the attempted assassination of U.S. President Ford in 1975, escaped from the Alderson Federal Prison for Women in West Virginia. She was recaptured two days later. 1989 Ousted Romanian President Nicolae Ceausescu and his wife, Elena, were captured as they were attempting to flee their country. 1990 Elections in Yugoslavia ended, leaving four of its six republics with non-Communist governments. 1995 A fire in Dabwali, India, killed 540 people, including 170 children, during a year-end party being held near the children's school. 1995 The bodies of 16 members of the Solar Temple religious sect were found in a clearing near Grenoble, France. 14 were presumed shot by two people who then committed suicide. 1997 Terry Nichols was convicted by a Denver jury on charges of conspiracy and involuntary manslaughter in the 1995 federal building bombing in Oklahoma City. The bomb killed 168 people. 1998 Guerrillas in south Lebanon fired dozens of rockets at northern Israel. 2020 Do smiled. 
 

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