Good Morning, Do! Today is Tuesday, January 17  | 1411If you like my work,
Please donate a dollar,
or two, if you can afford it!
Please, help me stay online!
 |
___________________________________________________ History: on this day, January 17, in 2002, It was announced that Microsoft had signed a joint venture agreement to produce software with two partners in China. The two partners were Beijin Centergate Technologies (Holding) Co. and the Stone Group. ____________________________________________________ Bonehead Award: Aurora man sentenced to twenty years in hammer attack _____________________________________________________ Q Efficiency is intelligent laziness. --- Socratex Technology is a way of organizing the universe so that man doesn't have to experience it. --- Max Frisch Reason is immortal, all else mortal. --- Pythagoras ____________________________________________________ Lucy went to college. However, she really worried her folks because all she ever wrote home about was boys and good times. Her mother decided to have a serious talk with Lucy when she came home for a weekend. The mother started out by saying, "Now, dear, if you are only going to college to find a husband, it certainly will be expensive shopping." "Yes, I know, Mom," said Lucy, "but what a supermarket." __________________________________________________ An angel appears at a faculty meeting and tells the dean that in return for his unselfish and exemplary behavior, the Lord will reward him with his choice of infinite wealth, infinite wisdom, or infinite beauty. Without hesitating, the dean selects infinite wisdom. "Done!" says the angel, and disappears in a cloud of smoke and a bolt of lightning. Now, all heads turn toward the dean, who sits surrounded by a faint halo of light. At length, one of his colleagues whispers, "Say something." The dean sighs and says, "I should have taken the money." __________________________________________________ Reported by Rock An International Bonehead Award has been earned by  Johnathan T. McDonald, 23, Aurora, Illinois, USA Aurora man sentenced to twenty years in hammer attack An Aurora man is being sentenced to twenty years in prison over a hammer attack in November of 2021. The Kane County State's Attorney's Office says that 23-year-old Johnathan T. McDonald pleaded guilty to attempted murder in exchange for the sentence. Prosecutors say that on November 20 McDonald went to the home of an acquaintance in Aurora and hit them in the head with a hammer twice. A news release from the state's attorney's office says there is no clear motivation for the attack and that McDonald and the victim had been friendly before. McDonald will need to serve at least 85 percent of his sentence. He's been in the Kane County Jail for over a year. ___________________________________________________  >From Linda Fjord In Norway ___________________________________________________ A teacher was giving a lesson on the circulation of the blood. Trying to make the matter clearer, he said: "Now, boys, if I stood on my head the blood, as you know, would run into it, and I would turn red in the face." "Yes, sir," the boys said. "Then why is it that while I am standing upright in the ordinary position the blood doesn't run into my feet?" A little fellow shouted, "'Cause yer feet ain't empty." ___________________________________________________ If you can spare a coin, PLEASE hit PayPal with it! ___________________________________________________  Red Panda _______________________________________________ You are 100% Texan if you have ever had this conversation : "You wanna Coke?" "Yeah." "What kind?" "Dr. Pepper." ____________________________________________________ A man and his little girl were on an overcrowded elevator. Suddenly a woman in front turned around, slapped him and left in a huff. The little girl remarked, "That's okay, Daddy, I didn't like her either, she was stepping all over my toes. That's why I pinched her." __________________________________________________ If you can spare a coin, PLEASE hit PayPal with it! _____________________________________________________ DearWebby's Tech Support Pits FROM: McCauley RE: Virus Alerts Dear Webby I get asked all the time if some supposed virus warning was serious. A while ago you had a link to the official virus hoax site. Can you please show that link again ? Also, how can one recognize a hoax without checking the official hoax site? Thanks C.McCauley Dear C You don't need to waste time with an official hoax site. If the email claims that Microsoft, AOL, IBM, etc. "announced" about a virus, then it is phony. If the email asks you to forward it to all your contacts, then it is phony. Real threats are caught automatically by MalwareBytes. No email alert is required. It updates on it's own in the background. Have FUN DearWebby _____________________________________________________ A Romanian woman, Marian Ghiorghiu, after hearing Brigitte Bardot ask the people of Bucharest to help solve the stray dog problem, took in five dogs and kicked out her husband. When her husband had come home and saw the dogs, he said, ''It's either me or the dogs.'' The dogs won. Ananova ____________________________________________________ Today, January 17 in 1377, The Papal See was transferred from Avignon in France back to Rome. 1562, French Protestants were recognized under the Edict of St. Germain. 1773, Captain Cook's Resolution became the first ship to cross the Antarctic Circle. 1795, The Dudingston Curling Society was organized in Edinburgh, Scotland. 1852, The independence of the Transvaal Boers was recognized by Britain. 1871, Andrew S. Hallidie received a patent for a cable car system. 1882, Thomas Edison's exhibit opened the Crystal Palace Exhibition in London. 1893, The Kingdom of Hawaii's monarchy was overthrown when a group of lawyers, businessmen and sugar planters forced Queen Liliuokalani to abdicate. 1900, The U.S. took Wake Island where there was an important cable link between Hawaii and Manila. 1900, Yaqui Indians in Texas proclaimed their independence from Mexico. 1900, Mormon Brigham Roberts was denied a seat in the U.S. House of Representatives for his practicing of polygamy. 1905, Punchboards were patented by a manufacturing firm in Chicago, IL. 1912, English explorer Robert Falcon Scott reached the South Pole. Norwegian Roald Amundsen had beaten him there by one month. Scott and his party died during the return trip. 1913, All partner interests in 36 Golden Rule Stores were consolidated and incorporated in Utah into one company. The new corporation was the J.C. Penney Company. 1916, The Professional Golfers Association was formed in New York City. 1928, The fully automatic, film-developing machine was patented by A.M. Josepho. 1934, Ferdinand Porsche submitted a design for a people's car, a "Volkswagen," to the new German Reich government. 1938, "Stepmother" debuted on CBS radio. 1945, Soviet and Polish forces liberated Warsaw during World War II. 1945, Swedish diplomat Raoul Wallenberg disappeared in Hungary while in Soviet custody. Wallenberg was credited with saving tens of thousands of Jews. 1946, The United Nations Security Council held its first meeting. 1949, "The Goldbergs" debuted on CBS-TV. The program had been on radio since 1931. The TV version lasted for four years. 1959, Senegal and the French Sudan joined to form the Federal State of Mali. 1961, In his farewell address, U.S. President Eisenhower warned against the rise of "the military-industrial complex." 1966, A B-52 carrying four H-bombs collided with a refuelling tanker. The bombs were released and eight crewmembers were killed. 1977, Double murderer Gary Gilmore became the first to be executed in the U.S. in a decade. The firing squad took place at Utah State Prison. 1991, Coalition airstrikes began against Iraq after negotiations failed to get Iraq to retreat from the country of Kuwait. 1992, An IRA bomb, placed next to a remote country road in County Tyrone, Northern Ireland, killed seven building workers and injured seven others. 1994, The Northridge earthquake rocked Los Angeles, CA, registering a 6.7 on the Richter Scale. At least 61 people were killed and about $20 billion in damage was caused. 1995, More than 6,000 people were killed when an earthquake with a magnitude of 7.2 devastated the city of Kobe, Japan. 1997, A court in Ireland granted the first divorce in the Roman Catholic country's history. 1997, Israel gave over 80% of Hebron to Palestinian rule, but held the remainder where several hundred Jewish settlers lived among 20,000 Palestinians. 1998, U.S. President Clinton gave his deposition in the Paula Jones sexual harassment lawsuit against him. He was the first U.S. President to testify as a defendant in a criminal or civil lawsuit. 2000, British pharmaceutical companies Glaxo Wellcome PLC and SmithKline Beecham PLC agreed to a merger that created the world's largest drugmaker. 2001, Congo's President Laurent Kabila was shot and killed during a coup attempt. Congolese officials temporarily placed Kabila's son in charge of the government. 2001, The director of Palestinian TV, Hisham Miki, was killed at a restaurant when three masked gunmen walked up to his table and shot him more than 10 times. 2002, It was announced that Microsoft had signed a joint venture agreement to produce software with two partners in China. The two partners were Beijin Centergate Technologies (Holding) Co. and the Stone Group. 2022 Do smiled.
If you can help with the cost of the
Humor Letter, please donate what you can! |  |
Go to TOP
Well, Do , that's all for today.
Have FUN !
Dear Webby from Webby.com
Please give a friend a subscription to the Humor Letter
If the greeting on top does NOT have your first name,
or at least your favorite nickname, please tell me.
I can correct that in two seconds and greet you properly
from then on.
If you want to give a gift subscription to a friend, but don't
have time to subscribe her or him, just hit REPLY and tell me.
I will gladly enter them for you and send them a confirmation request.
To reply to me personally, just hit REPLY or write to humor@webby.com
If you do not normally get the Humor Letter every day, and this was the first time,
then a friend sent you a one time sample or maybe even gave you a gift subscription.
If you like the Humor Letter, then you can subscribe at http://webby.com/sub.html
You can also UNsubscribe there.
If you don't want to receive the Webby Humor Letter,
please unsubscribe by clicking the link below:
You are currently subscribed to the Regular HTML version with this address:
newsletter@newslettercollector.com
UNSUBSCRIBE from the regular HTMLversion
| . |
Privacy Policy | About 
