Post to the Host

My grandfather was an ER doctor in Danville into the 1930s. He was asked in his older years how he handled the occasional drunken, combative patients on the weekend. He said, “I just give ’em a bit of apa-morphine (it triggers the vomiting reflex). I’ve never seen a man who could fight and throw up at the same time.”

Hartwell Harrison

I wonder how your grandpa’s nurses and the hospital janitor felt about the induced vomiting. I’m going to bet that he was a true gentleman and showed great patience with the drunks and that the apa-morphine was less than occasional, more like incidental, but it makes a good story. GK

I am four months older than you, but we are on the same page in life. I’m just as witty as you. Just can’t put it into words … wit very extensive … vocabulary very limited. My concern is one of us will die before the other and I will be totally at a loss for words. Please advise.

Bill Lemery

I’m sorry to be the cause of worry. I don’t think about death except when someone else brings it up. I thought about it a lot when I was in the 11^th grade and Buddy Holly crashed in a cornfield in Iowa. I thought about it after 9/11. My mother lived to the age of 97 and was in good spirits and of good mind to the end. This is a great gift to her children. When she came to the end, she was quite prepared to go and we stood around her bed and sang to her. I have hopes of maintaining some sort of career for another ten years or so, God willing. GK

GK,

I wish I had known sooner that you don’t want a library named after you. The mayor of Dime Box, Texas, who is a big fan of yours, told me he has proposed naming a library there in honor of you. From what I hear, over half of the 400 people in that town have read or heard your stories about Lake Wobegon and they have their own version of the Chatterbox Cafe to identify with. So don't be surprised if this happens.

Fred Nugent

Thrall, Texas

The library would be wise to name itself for the wealthiest person in town on the basis of his or her guaranteeing a generous grant. This will do something to improve the library whereas putting my name on it would only alienate the half of the town that doesn’t know me. I am not going to charge you for this advice, but it comes from the heart. GK

Looking forward to seeing your show in Akron this Sunday! I can relate to your Minnesota upbringing; I think Ohio Lutherans and Minnesota Lutherans have the same mindset! I have enjoyed your performance of the hymn “Always Remembered” on past shows. Since this is Memorial Weekend, I am hoping you might work that into your show someplace. I know you don’t take requests, but it would be so appropriate as we remember those generations who came before us who built this country, and also 50 wonderful years of Prairie Home Companion. Thanks for continuing to do what you do.

Mike Stuckman

I will see if Heather and Christine want to sing that with me. I love the song but it needs other voices on the chorus. GK

Just read your Losing My Mind column and have an offer for you. Have to say that not many years ago people would say to me, “You look like that guy on the radio on Saturday nights. What's his name?” Anyway, I did and I do, sort of, anymore. I do have a “sense” of humor, I guess somewhat like yours because I have enjoyed your weekly episodes of PHC for many years, read some of your books, and do read your emails. 

So what I am offering: to be your body double, your look-alike stand-in, your stunt double, or the like. I grew up in South Dakota so I have a Great Plains accent like yours, I can get some rumpled suits and red shoes, and I wear thick glasses — what I am saying is that I naturally look, act, and move like you, at least from a distance. Not enough to fool your closest and most intimate friends but I think I can be a close-enough person to make people think I am you on the subway, bus, walking on the NY streets, or in the local coffee shops. And with some study and practice I think I can mimic your vocalizations and word usage. Not saying anything about copying your keen and fine sense of humor. I can also do a pretty good job of handling young teenage girls who mob you for your autograph — at least I would like to try. And what the heck — someday one of your mob might take your autograph onto Antiques Roadshow to find out the value. I think I can, with practice, do a pretty good job of making a copy of that that would fool many of those antique experts. So whadayasay?

Robert Moats

I say, No thanks. I like meeting people. People who’ve listened to the old radio show for years are not fans, they’re friends. I’m in Scranton as I write this, eating breakfast at a Hilton, and three people from Cooperstown walked up and we had breakfast together. One was a Rotarian and a children’s book author, the other two were parents of a dyslexic daughter, and we talked for about 40 minutes about various things — opera, computers, Rotary — over eggs and bacon. I’ve led a very narrow life and meeting friendly strangers is very educational. GK

Hi. I read your 5/20 column Losing My Mind in NY and: I have had several dear friends and relatives suggest that Lion’s Mane mushrooms, taken as a supplement, can enhance memory and nerve growth within the brain. I personally have been taking the supplement, the Paul Stametsbrand of Host Defense. I have noticed that things like people’s names and “where the hell did I leave x,y,z” to be significantly stronger and much more fluidly available.

It might be worth a whirl!

Much love,

John Mickelson

Thanks, John, and I’ll turn your suggestion over to the science experts in the family. GK

Garrison,

Just read your Losing my mind … and have a question: is there a connection between your misadventures in Manhattan and the absence of your beloved? She seems to be finding her bliss in Minnesota while you’re exploring ERs not in Minnesota! I see a worrisome pattern emerging!

Daniel Griset

She goes to Minnesota occasionally to play in an orchestra and see relatives, but she’s the New Yorker, not I. My visit to the ER at New York-Presbyterian was not a “misadventure,” it was a great experience. I told her all about it and she came home two days later to supervise my recovery and get me back on the road. GK

Hi, Garrison.

You had wondered if they teach kindness in med school. Having been there, I would say (at least based on my circa 1980s experience) not explicitly, but you hopefully see it modeled for you by individuals who represent the kind of physician you aspire to be. (Unfortunately, kindness isn’t usually directed at the trainees, particularly during internship/residency!)

Glad you are okay!
Best,
Pat McCormack

Thanks for the clarification. GK

Share

Help celebrate the 50th anniversary of A Prairie Home Companion with this handsome black T-shirt!

CLICK HERE to buy today!