I think about money a lot because it’s part of my job here, but also because I always have. While cleaning out my closet a few months back, I found a stack of old college notebooks that contained the embarrassing things a 19-year-old reading political theory for the first time might write down—“WHAT IS FREEDOM UNDER CAPITALISM??????”—mixed in with endless pages of equations I had done and redone in the same tight, all-caps script. They were budgets: my weekly earnings with rent, groceries, and utilities deducted. I crossed them out and started over any time I picked up another shift, lost one, or had the front wheel stolen off my bike and had to replace it. I still keep budgets, and still think about these things with the same mix of stoner abstraction and material practicality. Money, as I understood it then and still do now, was both real and not real. The expense lists are the real kind of money. Jeff Bezos is the fake kind, which is to say that there’s a certain level of wealth or number on a spreadsheet that’s more an idea than anything else. Last month, while tens of millions of people were applying for unemployment and burning through their limited or nonexistent savings, the Amazon founder’s fortune grew by $24 billion. His net worth now stands at $138 billion. What do you do with $138 billion? It doesn’t feel like a number. It’s a horizon—a money infinity—not a place. (This is also why deficits don’t matter.) |