| Hello, The current lock-downs are challenging and it affects each individual differently as we know social isolation, dealing with economic pressures, homeschooling and uncertainty can all contribute to mental stress. Relationship Matters is here to support you through these times. Our team of professionals are available both via telephone and telehealth to work with you individually or as a family to help you through these times. Recent Department of Health and Human Services (DHHS) data shows Victoria has recorded a 33 per cent rise in children presenting to hospital with self-harm injuries over the past six weeks, compared to a year earlier. The total number of self-harm presentations to emergency departments across all ages increased by 9.3 per cent. At Relationship Matters, we have specialist family therapist and counsellors who work with children and can support your child before issues escalate. We encourage you to be in touch with us as early intervention is key and our counsellors can support you, your family members or friends. Our workplace services support well-being, harmony and productivity in your workplace through team counselling and coaching, team health checks, mediation and conflict resolution, Training programs, Lunchtime well-being classes in emotional intelligence, resilience, and effective communication. If these can support your workplace we encourage you to get in touch with us. Our Relationship Education programs are offered online and I encourage you to see our upcoming relationship courses. Our team of counsellors and mediators are here to assist you as well. We are here to support you. Stay safe and keep smiling and we will get through this together. Yours sincerely, Janet Jukes CEO Relationship Matters |
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 | Help to navigate life after separation At Relationship Matters, professional and supportive counsellors and mediators are here to help people work through issues that can follow a separation. Mediators understand the difficulty and stress couples have been facing and aim to keep the process simple and find the best outcome for all involved.
Anjali turned to Relationship Matters when her relationship ended, on the advice of a family lawyer. She felt she had hit rock bottom and she was locked in conflict with her former partner. They couldn’t agree on anything and needed to work through how they were going to support their children and make payments such as the mortgage and school fees.
A mediator was able to help the couple reach agreements about how they parent their children after separation as well as help them to resolve outstanding financial and property matters. The pair have now both moved on financially and have a plan for how they communicate and resolve differences in the future.
Cath Tregillis, Executive Manager of Dispute Resolution and Education at Relationship Matters says Anjali’s story is common and it can make a big difference if couples can commit to mediation early in their separation. “Even though it can be a very raw time for lots of people, if they can come to agreements early on without too much legal involvement by having communication plans, it can make a huge difference moving forward,” she says.
Relationship Matters’ mediators are impartial and will work with a couple to assist them to make plans that work for both parents and, most importantly, work for any children involved. “We also understand how difficult separation can be for families and we offer a wide range of services that can assist further, including counselling, parenting courses and family violence programs.”
Picture credit: Joe Mastroianni |
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 | Supporting Children and Families Changes due to the pandemic have happened quite rapidly and families and individuals have had to adjust to varied scenarios in their homes. From adapting to technology, working from home, homeschooling and economic pressures can lead to stress and feeling overwhelmed. On the positive side of things, families have been at home and spending quality time increasing bonds within the family.
Uncertainty and isolation have contributed to poor mental health and though some children are resilient, for some, it can be overwhelming. Children have not been able to socialise with friends or engage in their normal routines while experiencing the stress parents feel as well. This has contributed to children experiencing anxiety. Early intervention is key and support is available.
Relationship Matters have experienced child counsellors who can support parents to find ways to stimulate children, establish a structure to the day and promote quality family time together. Structure motivates children and allows them a space to speak up about the issues they are grappling with. Please call Relationship Matters on 1300 543 396 and discuss how you can support your children. |
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 | Self-care During Times of Stress Self-care is any deliberate activity that refuels us, be it physically, emotionally, physically or spiritually. The form self-care takes is particular to the individual; one person’s day spa is another person’s triathlon training. Although it’s a simple concept, in theory, it’s something we very often overlook. Good self-care is key to improved mood and reduced anxiety. It’s also key to a good relationship with oneself and others. Do you ever notice how your partner or flatmate or parent is in a better mood once they’ve watched their footy team win/done some gardening/read their gossip magazines? Self-care becomes even more important during times of stress, to prevent burnout and counterbalance the effects of increased cortisol, decreased energy levels and increased mental pressure. One way to make the most of self-care is to do it intentionally, e.g., before you settle into an absorbing movie or book, or do something creatively, acknowledge to yourself ‘this is my rest and recharge’. |
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 | Parenting After Separation Recently separated? Are kids involved? Separation is a difficult time for children as well as parents. Because it can be difficult to focus on your children’s long term wellbeing when you are upset. Parenting after Separation is an online group for separated parents and carers who want to learn more about how they can best support their child through the process of family separation. The group will help you to learn more about managing your ongoing relationship with a former partner and to reduce conflict, whilst supporting your children during this transition. Our Parenting After Separation group programs run regularly online. To find a program date suitable, please visit https://relationshipmatters.com.au/programs/parenting-after-separation/ or contact 1300 543 396. |
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 | Group Counselling in the Workplace We’re aware that many of our clients have been interested to explore ways with us to support their staff during the COVID-19 pandemic. To that end, we’d like to share our experience that our delivery of group counselling and group wellbeing support sessions have been very effective ways for workplaces to support their employees. Some of the distinct benefits of group sessions are: - Provides tools and support to staff members who are not inclined to make an individual appointment but who nonetheless benefit from psychological support at this time
- Can offer positive psychology approaches to learn and grow during times of change
- In the group environment, feelings are shared and ‘normalised’.
- Provides a sense of team togetherness during a time of disruption
- Demonstrates to staff their organisation’s support for their wellbeing during this time
- Allows the employer to brief the counsellor on any issues of concern for that particular workplace group. For example, workloads, uncertainty, vicarious trauma, workplace division, engagement issues.
If this is something of interest to your workplace, please feel free to contact Priscilla Floyd, Manager Workplace services on 0435 897 015 or via email pfloyd@relationshipmatters.com.au to discuss. |
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 | Useful Resources and Tips The Corona virus is undoubtedly changing the way we live. It is impacting each of our lives and our relationships. We have put together some resources that will help you strengthen your relationships and support you during the COVID-19 pandemic. Click on the links below to read the resources as well as download a printable version.
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 | Matters of Adoption – A Podcast The Podcast takes a look at the myriad of perspectives and opinions around intercountry adoption in Australia.
Our first series of 4 episodes, has a focus on the life stages of adoptees and we interview some of our practitioners about the work they’ve been doing to support adoptive parents, adoptee children and teens as well as young and older adult adoptees. We’d like to acknowledge that this series is exploring the practitioner’s perspective, and future episodes will include the voices of all involved.
Listen to it here
https://soundcloud.com/user-797692394/sets/icafss-podcast-series-1 |
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 | What clients say about Tuning in to Teens™ Tuning in to Teens™ supports parents to help teenagers manage difficult feelings such as fear, sadness and anger, as well as how to stay calm when dealing with teens' challenging behaviours. It shows you how to help your teen develop emotional intelligence. Feedback from attendees: What have you got out of the group? - Sometimes better off just listening, not the solving problem
- Staying calm, No. 1
- Learning about how the brain works and develops
- I learnt a lot. We are all in this together
- My ‘go-to’ no is to be supportive and it’s helpful to learn about the brain and how it relates to myself
- It has been good. Some things are hard to apply. Lots of good advice. Like the parenting styles
- Support from other parents, working out the best way to parent our children, lots of support
- I appreciate the idea of not having to solve problems as number 1
- Not having to have all the answers is important
- It has been great. It has helped me to understand both my past and my future.
- We are all on the same page as a group
How has this experience strengthened your relationship with your teen? - Trying to be calmer
- I have been able to keep the interactions calmer
- Able to keep calm in stressful situations and able to walk away when you can’t
- I’m much more aware of how my adolescent is feeling and when to say something
- I have learnt a lot about how to be a better parent, it’s been great
- I feel that my child has not had big meltdowns over the past few weeks. That’s amazing and I can only hope that this will continue.
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 | No matter what issues you face in your relationships, Relationship Matters is here to support you. We offer telephone and telehealth counselling.
Visit www.relationshipmatters.com.au for more details or call 1300 543 396 |
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